Daily Hilarity: Republicans Confuse Reagan For Eisenhower

The Onion reports on the blunder:

WASHINGTON—At a press conference Monday, visibly embarrassed leaders of the Republican National Committee acknowledged that their nonstop, effusive praise of Ronald Reagan has been wholly unintentional, admitting they somehow managed to confuse him with Dwight D. Eisenhower for years.

The GOP’s humiliating blunder was discovered last weekend by RNC chairman Reince Priebus, who realized his party had been extolling “completely the wrong guy” after he watched the History Channel special Eisenhower: An American Portrait.

“When I heard about Eisenhower’s presidential accomplishments—holding down the national debt, keeping inflation in check, and fighting for balanced budgets—it hit me that we’d clearly gotten their names mixed up at some point,” Priebus told reporters. “I couldn’t believe we’d been associating terms like ‘visionary,’ ‘principled,’ and ‘bold’ with President Reagan. That wasn’t him at all—that was Ike.

But maybe they were both like that, right? From a non-satirical site, a list of Reagan divergences from the principles conservatives want to imagine he would fiercely enforce:

When he was president, did you know that Ronald Reagan raised taxes 11 times? And when he was governor of California, Reagan signed into law the largest tax increase in the history of any state up until then? Now, what do you think FOX News would have said about that?

Also President Reagan almost tripled the federal budget deficit during his time in office. The debt increased to nearly $3 trillion. That’s almost three times as much debt as the U.S. had accumulated in the first 80 years of the 20th century. That’s a lot of debt. I thought Republicans were against debt.

In addition, President Reagan also illegally gave weapons to Iran. He negotiated with terrorists. Secretly sold arms to Iran in exchange for American hostages and money for contrast. That was the Iran contra fair. Does it get any worse than negotiating with terrorists?

And in 1984, Reagan pulled American troops out of Lebanon. President Reagan deployed an American peace keeping force in Beirut but after 241 U.S. services members were killed in a bombing ordered by Hezbollah, he ran for the hills.

President Reagan also — and this is crazy I know, but I’ll explained, he helped to start the Taliban and Osama Bin Laden. How? Reagan was trying to fight the Soviet Union which made sense but he trained, equipped and funded the Islamic Mujahideen fighters in Afghanistan. His plan backfired a little bit when they became the Taliban and Osama Bin Laden, which were the tough fighters for that group. I’m not giving all of the blame for him there. But it did turn out that way.

Now, if all that wasn’t bad enough, this one is going to sting. Reagan gave amnesty to three million undocumented immigrants. He signed a law that made any immigrant who entered the U.S. before 1982 eligible for amnesty. Complete amnesty.

Marmalade has a ton of videos chronicling the real Reagan, as opposed to the mythical one of conservative imagination.

Your Thoughts?

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About Daniel Fincke

Dr. Daniel Fincke  has his PhD in philosophy from Fordham University and spent 11 years teaching in college classrooms. He wrote his dissertation on Ethics and the philosophy of Friedrich Nietzsche. On Camels With Hammers, the careful philosophy blog he writes for a popular audience, Dan argues for atheism and develops a humanistic ethical theory he calls “Empowerment Ethics”. Dan also teaches affordable, non-matriculated, video-conferencing philosophy classes on ethics, Nietzsche, historical philosophy, and philosophy for atheists that anyone around the world can sign up for. (You can learn more about Dan’s online classes here.) Dan is an APPA  (American Philosophical Practitioners Association) certified philosophical counselor who offers philosophical advice services to help people work through the philosophical aspects of their practical problems or to work out their views on philosophical issues. (You can read examples of Dan’s advice here.) Through his blogging, his online teaching, and his philosophical advice services each, Dan specializes in helping people who have recently left a religious tradition work out their constructive answers to questions of ethics, metaphysics, the meaning of life, etc. as part of their process of radical worldview change.