A Personal Note

As I’ve said in the past, I don’t usually write about myself or my personal life on this blog. But every so often, something forces me to break that rule. This is one of those occasions.

As of yesterday, I’m engaged to be married to the love of my life: a wonderful woman who, for the past eight years, has been my friend and companion. It’s been my great good fortune and happiness to have been together with her this far, and I’m looking forward to making our commitment a formal one.

I’m going to schedule the next few posts for automatic publication, but I’ll be around to approve and answer comments as I find the time.

Why Atheism Is a Force for Good
Weekend Coffee: February 22
Atlas Shrugged: Bring Me a New Black Guy
New on the Guardian: Beyond Debating God’s Existence
About Adam Lee

Adam Lee is an atheist writer and speaker living in New York City. His new novel, City of Light, is available in paperback and e-book. Read his full bio, or follow him on Twitter.

  • http://whyihatejesus.blogspot.com/ OMGF


  • Reality

    WOW! Congratulations! I wish you all the best. Or to put it more appropriately, may your marriage maximize the happiness of both yourself and your fiance.

  • Jennifer A. Burdoo

    Mazel tov!

    Yeah, yeah, it’s not QUITE a rationalist way of saying it. Call it force of habit! (grin)

  • Nathan

    Best wishes for the future!

  • http://intrinsicallyknotted.wordpress.com Susan B.

    Some things are more important than blogging. Go be happy and celebrate!

  • http://godlesswoman.blogspot.com/ Lisa

    Congrats! I hope that you two have fun planning your wedding.

  • Jesse

    Congratulations! May your future together be filled with joy!

  • OhioAtheist

    Congratulations! :)

  • Erika


  • heliobates

    Hey Adam, congrats.

    I just got married this weekend. We had a humanist officiant, wrote our own ceremony that affirmed our dignity as fully-caused human beings and we read your Atheist Dinner Benediction before our meal. Aside from the fact that we fill our lives with the coolest people, both of us received nothing but praise for how “meaningful” our ceremony was and how touching was the “grace”.

    No meaning without God? I got your meaning right cheer.

    Let us know how the big day turns out.

  • Polly

    :D -> Congratulations!

  • WasAGod


  • http://www.brucealderman.info/blog/ BruceA


  • 2-D Man

    Congrats, Ebon. It’s great to read that you’re so happy!

  • http://thestoneoftear.blogspot.com Callandor


    Of course, you need to be prepared for the most annoying questions to come. “What are the wedding plans?” “When will the children arrive?” “Who is changing last names?” “When are you moving in together?” (Alternatively, “When are you getting a new house?”)

    And the final one “When are the children arriving?” Yes, because they WILL ask twice.

  • Kevin

    Cool! I wish you two well.

  • caligatia


  • James B

    Fantastic news! Well done mate. :)

  • cinder

    Ebon, that is stupendous news indeed. All people deserve happiness and prosperity, though some never seem to acquire. I am gladdened to hear the news. May it be fruitful and long lasting. :-)

  • Stacey Melissa

    A big congrats to both of you!

  • Dawn Rhapsody

    Wonderful news, Adam. I know that it’ll be a real marriage; you’re doing it for yourselves and no one else, visible or invisible.

    All the best! :D

  • http://www.yunshui.wordpress.com yunshui

    Congratulations to you both! I just got married last week, and I can assure you it’s the most worthwhile thing you’ll ever do.

    Unless you have kids, of course. But good for you! I hope you will be blissfully happy together.

  • Nightcap

    Mazel Tov and goodonya!

    I’m fortunate enough to be married to my best friend and unindicted co-conspirator. The meaning of life and purpose of the universe can be found in her smile. I wish you and yours love, peace and joy!

  • HeavyThinker

    Congratulations! If you’ve been together for 8 years, then you can probably make it through anything.

  • Valhar2000

    In the words of the genius Tery Prattchett: May your loins be fruitful!

  • http://atheistself.blogspot.com David W.

    Congratulations, that’s excellent news!

  • http://inthenuts.blogspot.com King Aardvark

    I second what Callandor said. It’s a mix of good and bad. (good = you two, bad = everyone else being annoying – unless all your relatives are really laid-back).


  • NoAstronomer

    Congratulations to you and your betrothed!!! Church wedding?

  • hb531

    Adam, congratulations!As with heliobates, I too had an entirely secular wedding and it was a blast. We wrote out own vows because they would be more meaningful to us if we did so, rather than using the vows of someone else’s standards. After all, being married is a personal commitment between two people, so third parties are rather useless. Furthermore, the lack of any religious reference during the ceremony sent a clear message to those in attendance, especially to those who were religious, without hitting them over the head with it.

    Again, congratulations.

  • mikespeir

    Hey, this is great! Best wishes for a long and happy life together.

    BTW, don’t sound so apologetic about writing personal stuff. If it’s your own desire for privacy, that’s understandable; but you might be surprised at how interested we really are.

  • Rowan

    Congratulations, Adam, and many of them!

  • http://bluelinchpin.wordpress.com Blue Linchpin


  • Joffan

    Many congratulations, and what took you so long?

    NoAstronomer wrote
    Church wedding?

    I laughed… but anything is possible.

  • http://anexerciseinfutility.blogspot.com Tommykey

    Wundaful! Glad to hear the news.

  • http://dominicself.co.uk Dominic Self

    Many congratulations to you both! :D

  • http://redmolly.typepad.com RedMolly

    Congratulations on your engagement, Adam! And congratulations, heliobates, on your marriage. Now the fun begins! Mazel tov and Many Years.

  • jack

    Best wishes to both of you! A happy marriage is a marvelous thing.

  • Christopher

    While I don’t believe in the institution of marraige (I’ve always preferred promiscuous relationships) I still wish you and your girl the best of luck in your new life together. I hope that both of you will take away all you can from this relationship.

  • Louis Doench

    Secular Weddings Rock!
    No stale formula’s to follow, and no guilt for all the… fornicating you did beforehand.
    (8 years? I assume there was some fornication.)

    Advice from a fellow married guy… The wedding prep will be stressful, but simply plan for the reception to be the best party you’ve ever thrown for your friends and family and you’ll enjoy it.

  • velkyn

    I’ll add congrats! I was married in a secular service, quick, to the point, and full of friends and my brother was married in a utterly long tedious religous one (poor guy, his mother-in-law is a nutcase evangelical minster) and guess which wedding people enjoyed more? :)

    finding that special someone is probably one of the best things in life. My husband and I will have been married 17 years and together for 18.

  • Malky

    Congratulations – I wish both all the best for the future

  • terrence

    CONGRATULATIONS!! And may Curly Howard never show up at your door at census time to ask “Are you married or happy?”


  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03859405216390259275 Rose

    Congrats! I just got married last Saturday, welcome to the club ;) I wish you all the best!!!

  • JR

    Congratulations and all the best!

  • http://spaninquis.wordpress.com/ Spanish Inquisitor

    Congratulations Adam, to you, to the future Mrs. Muse, and also to all your faithful readers who also a got married recently(heliobates, Yunshui, and Rose).

    Congrats to all of you.

    And post a few pics.

  • http://www.blacksunjournal.com BlackSun

    Big Congrats, Adam!

  • Juan Felipe

    Congratulations to both!

  • Entomologista


  • http://michaelgr.com/ Michael G.R.

    Congrats! Happy for you.

  • Steven

    Eight years? That’s longer than most folks manage to stay married these days. I’m curious as to which one of you proposed. It sounds like your future spouse is a very patient (or very mature) person – many people are not willing to wait and seem to think that no proposal equals a lack of commitment.
    I’ve been married for a while now and can honestly say that I’ve never lived so fully as I’ve done since my wedding day.
    Good wishes to both of you – I strongly recommend a cash bar at the reception :)

  • http://cranialhyperossification.com GDad


  • Nes

    Congratulations Ebonmuse and MissCherryPi!

  • http://blog.evangelicalrealism.com Deacon Duncan

    Congratulations! May you have a long and happy life together and be a blessing to each other and to those around you.

  • http://www.daylightatheism.org Ebonmuse

    Thank you, all! My sincere gratitude to everyone who’s left their kind wishes. And yes, you can all be assured that this is going to be a secular wedding. :) We’re thinking of enlisting a Unitarian minister to be the officiant, which is absolutely fine with me. Of course, we have plenty of time to consider those details.

    Also, just for the record: The legality of gay marriage in Massachusetts and California did not deter our decision in any way. ;)

  • Judy

    Congratulations, Adam! Much love to you and your lady!

  • http://metroblog.blgospot.com Metro

    Good on you! I hope I’m not too late to wish you all the best.

  • silentsanta

    just wanted to say ‘Congrats’. Wish you both all the best

  • Matt R.

    Awesome! Congrats!

  • Janice

    Sucker! No I mean, congratulations Ebon! ;)

  • JoshH

    I’ll echo everyone else’s sentiments by wishing both of you the best :D. Congratulations!

  • Rosemary Lyndall Wemm

    Congrats, of course.

    Here is a choice of attire to wear for the wedding:


    My secularly-married husband of 13 years (together for 14, phenomenally accidental kid of 13)just bought one of the second mentioned variety. It’s a hoot because there is absolutely no truth in it. We have a wonderful (and entirely godless) marriage. I wish the two of you the same excellent luck. With eight years experience I think you will manage the “mixed” part just fine.