The Twitter Report: The Secret Purpose of Twitter

I probably shouldn’t have said this in public, but now that the cat’s out of the bag, I might as well tell you all as well.

It all started a few days ago with a question about what the median number of Twitter followers is among active accounts. It turns out to be surprisingly low – less than 100 – and people with just 1000 followers are in the 96th percentile. This prompted me to make the following observation:

PZ rejoindered that even being in the top 1% would still put you among a vast horde, and that’s when I made the crucial slip-up.

Well, thanks to my loose tongue, the damage was done. The only thing to do at that point, I thought, was to be completely candid with everyone:

Several people raised questions about this, so the following day I had to post a followup:

I hope this resolves any remaining questions. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have the Illuminati on the other line, and I have to do some fast talking – they’re pretty upset with me for disclosing the space-ark thing, as you can imagine. But as long as I don’t reveal the even more secret connection between Reddit upvotes and the kraken-proof dome cities on the ocean floor, I’m pretty sure I can smooth things over…

"Based on who benefits most from American law and looking at the history of our ..."

Who Are the Real Americans?
"Carl Sagan: "We come from people who walked, from East Africa to Novaya Zemlya to ..."

Who Are the Real Americans?
"I agree but you'll never get the Zionists to, their existence is based on false ..."

Who Are the Real Americans?
"Perhaps he thinks that while we can't do anything about citizens, dangerous aliens could be ..."

Who Are the Real Americans?

Browse Our Archives

Follow Us!

What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment