Beck Won’t Send Kids to College

Glenn Beck has been ranting like a lunatic about the new Common Core standards, developed by the National Governor’s Association and the Council of Chief State School Officers (not the federal government). Naturally, this is all a giant conspiracy to brainwash your children and Beck will no longer let his kids go to college because of the many unspoken dangers.


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  • shouldbeworking

    With daddy’s outlook on public education, could hey pass the SATs to get into a reputable college anyway?

  • Synfandel

    To be fair, education is the biggest threat to the lunatic right wing.

  • David C Brayton

    I feel for Mr, Beck.

    Mr. Beck, being a fantastic teacher and a fine citizen, has imbued his children with the ability to tell bullshit from the truth and good from evil. Yet, his children are so fragile and tender that they cannot venture forth into the world and stand up for what is right.

    To realize that the world is such an awful place that you must prevent your children from simply hearing ideas different from the Truth…well, that must be a terrifying realization.

  • nigelTheBold, also Avo

    Wow. You can see him make an outlandish statement, like, “This is vey frightening,” and then pause to think up something frightening. The most he can come up with is, “Be aware. There are many ways to mark people. Be aware.”

    I’m wondering what new marking is in the Common Core standards. I mean, other than grades.

  • Reverend PJ

    @4 They might (shudder) mandate a brief narrative describing the student’s progress.

  • raven

    Beck Won’t Send Kids to College

    Beck is probably lying here.

    1. He can certainly afford it. The guy is worth an estimated $100 million and growing rapidly.

    2. His kids won’t have to go to college anyway. They can spend dad’s money earned being cuckoo for several lifetimes if they are even slightly careful.

    3. There are lots of fake xian colleges that brainwash kids while teaching them nothing. They exist mostly to entertain the kids while promoting endogamy, marriage within the cults. They aren’t cheap but you often get a lot of entertainment for the money. For kids who don’t want to grow up or the parents, they make great babysitters.

    Some are Mormon, BYU and BYU Idaho.

    You wouldn’t want your kid to marry a Mormon would you? They don’t want their kids to marry nonMormons either. One of the Mormon popes said the worst thing a Mormon can do is marry a nonMormon. For once, I agree with them completely.

  • Gregory in Seattle

    @raven #6 – PROBABLY lying?

  • Mr Ed

    knowledge is ignorance

  • anubisprime

    Almost a way around avoiding the reality of …well reality!

    Education not only threatens bigotry it reveals the underlying premise, and some folks do not want their offspring to realize a very salient point.

    That some parents swim in ignorance, and most glory in it because they have not the integrity to do other!

    And deep down they cannot countenance the shame of being seen for what and who they are!

    One reason that fundies hate college and certainly a reason why Beck would…absolute fear of being found out!

  • Ben P

    According to Wikipedia Beck’s oldest two children (first wife) were born in 1988 and 1990. Without looking further, one would assume that if those children were going to attend college, they’d be there already. He has two younger kids from a second marriage though.

  • Hercules Grytpype-Thynne

    Beck Won’t Send Kids to College

    Not even Beck University?

    (BTW, preview is pretty borked.

  • erichoug

    Great, that’s exactly what the world needs another bunch of lack-wit, know nothing teenagers whose parents prepared them to be a youth minister or a choir director. Awesome.

    The people I really feel sad for are the kids. Their parents are not serving their best interests by taking an anti-education path. By keeping them in ignorance and not letting them get all the facts and make up their own minds they are almost certainly poisoning them against their own belief system. The smarter ones will be furious at having been lied to and misled whiled even the dumber ones will likely develop some sense that they have been somehow short changed.

    Education is the only hope for the future of humanity and by denying it to their children, these right wing lunatics and fundamentalist fanatics are ensuring that we have no future.

  • Larry

    And this is a problem because???

  • TGAP Dad

    I think Beck may soon discover that 18-year-olds will do what they want, despite their father’s wishes.

  • thomasmorris

    There are lots of fake xian colleges that brainwash kids while teaching them nothing … Some are Mormon, BYU and BYU Idaho.

    To be fair, BYU isn’t exactly Liberty University – and it does sometimes provide a decent education. Several of their programs are actually quite respected – and outside of the 12 credits of mandatory religion classes, it is possible to avoid most of the BS if you choose your professors wisely (I was a part of an underground “reprobate” community during my final semesters there, which helped in that regard.) A few of the classes started off with a prayer – and some teachers occasionally threw in the obligatory “and this connects to gospel principles in this way” speech – but overall I managed to avoid the worst of it. We even watched a few (gasp!) R-rated movies and read some moderately “controversial” literature in a few of my advanced classes.

    Yes, the biology classes teach evolution – and, at least in my experience, it was never in a “well, we don’t actually believe this but you’ve gotta learn about it anyways” manner. We actually had a multi-day lecture that could be summed up as: “Yes, evolution is definitely real – reconcile that with your faith in whatever way you will, but it’s pretty much impossible to deny the reality of it.” One of my professors even went so far as to go through and explain why Bruce McConkie’s (an LDS general authority) rantings about evolution were bullshit.

    That’s not to deny the brainwashing element or anything – a lot of parents send their kids there with the hope that it’ll help “keep them on the path” as opposed to all those other, “corrupt” universities. When they do teach things like evolution, oftentimes the professors will get angry letters from parents. And then there’s the fact that they can kick you out and prevent you from getting a copy of your transcript if you openly admit to losing your faith or commit some “egregious sin.”

    BYU kind of has to walk a fine line between satisfying their (generally orthodox Mormon) alumni/donors and making sure that they remain an accredited university. It’s definitely not an experience I would wish on anyone (though sometimes the sheer absurdity of certain aspects of the “honor code” and campus culture did provide a great deal of amusement), but the educational aspects can be pretty decent.

  • eric

    He dislikes 38 states agreeing on standards for public K-12 curricula, so he refuses to send his kids to a private (or public) university of his choice. Got it. Makes total Beckian sense.

  • Dave Maier

    Thanks, thomasmorris, that sounds very plausible.

  • busterggi

    Godfrey Daniels – it spawned????

  • sosw

    I think Beck may soon discover that 18-year-olds will do what they want, despite their father’s wishes.

    I’ve always found the US notion of parents “sending their kids to college/uni” more than a little bit outdated, although I do understand the financial reasons for it.

    IMHO education — much like healthcare — is such an obvious benefit to society that anyone sane should support it being universally available (and high-quality).

  • TCC

    Holy crap, has he read the standards? As an ELA teacher, I’ve been poring over those standards for the past 2-3 years or so, and I don’t even know how anyone could find anything objectionable in them, even for someone with the feverishly raving mind of Glenn Beck. Then again, it’s probably just the existence of the standards themselves that are the problem, not the content of those standards.

  • patricksimons

    I’m sure he didn’t mean to do it but Beck just announced that his ideas do not bear much inspection. I use the word “ideas’ loosely.

  • slc1

    Re thomasmorris @ #15

    Sounds a little like Wheaton College.

  • Karen Locke

    If his kids see college as the path to what they want to do, and if they’ve inherited his intransigence, they’ll get whatever degrees they need. I married into a family of stubbornness; you don’t argue with the in-laws or the husband unless you’ve got a whole bushel of facts on your side. Beck strikes me as having that bullheadedness without the sublayer of reason. He may just hear, “get $%&*, Dad, I’m going to college and I’ll work full time and pay for it myself.”

    (Yes, this is possible, a whole lot of people in the U.S. do it. They may not graduate from the top 10 schools, but they don’t do too badly for themselves, either.)

  • raven

    Holy crap, has he read the standards?

    Don’t be silly. Of course he has no idea what is in the standards.

    This is Glenn Beck here.

    A better question is whether he had his minders read the standards to him.

    If his kids see college as the path to what they want to do,…

    Technically, at age 18 his kids are adults and can do whatever they want.

    In practice, Glenn Beck is very wealthy and the kids don’t have to do anything to end up the same, just by waiting. And not ticking Daddy Warbucks off too much. I’m sure that is hard though. Glenn Beck always looks like he is about to explode in rage.

    It’s just as likely he is spouting off and hoping some of his cowlike listeners will decide to send their kid’s college funds to him.

  • grumpyoldfart

    Beck isn’t frightened of anything. He makes his money selling fear to the public.

    After the show he sits back and laughs at the gullibility of his audience.

  • bryanfeir

    Yes, the biology classes teach evolution […]

    Considering the BYU is world-famous for its paleontology museum and department, thanks largely to James A. Jensen and the large number of workable fossil beds in Utah, I should hope that most of the staff there are pretty realistically grounded in terms of evolution.

  • d.c.wilson

    Typical Beck fear mongering. Make some vague pronouncements designed to terrify parents without giving any details as to how or why these standards are going to brainwash your kids.

    I keep hoping that his audience will eventually figure out that he’s just peddling fear because fear sells, but that’s like hoping that one day, Limbaugh will say something so offensive that even his most ardent defenders will abandon him.

    There is no bottom to the conservative entertainment complex.

  • shouldbeworking

    Beck’s problem, other than the one with reality, is that they are Common standards. It don’t take no genius to figure that Common and Communist have the same origin. Make the connections!

  • Modusoperandi

    d.c.wilson “There is no bottom to the conservative entertainment complex.”

    There is. Also, shovels.*


    * Fast forward to 2040, when the current crop are presented (by the, I’m told, “liberal media”) as sensible, moderate, centrists.

  • mudpuddles

    @ nigel the bold, #4

    They’re going to tag kids electronically. Its a government plot to enable colleges to… eh… return kids to their owners when they’re lost or stolen.

    Oh no wait… that’s for kittens. Or turtles, I think.

  • mikecline

    At least he’ll be non-paying for their non-education with non-gold. Hope he lost a bundle. However, he seems cunning and slimey enough to push gold to his gullible audience but not actually buy in himself. Hope he’s dumper than he looks.

  • uzza

    Katie Goodman explains Glenn Beck quite well.

  • democommie

    “Oh no wait… that’s for kittens. Or turtles, I think.”

    Let’s hope that the kittehs and turtles are not housed in the same kennel; we know what that sort of thing will lead to.

    “Katie Goodman explains Glenn Beck quite well.”

    For my part, expanding on, “Bek’s a monomaniacal fucking asshole” is not required.

  • Barefoot Bree

    TCC @ 20: (I recognize that avatar, btw – is that you, old buddy?)

    The other day on NPR I heard a story about the standards, and had a clip of one principal (I think) who absolutely refused to implement them in his school because he was convinced they would just add more and more testing to an already test-saturated school year. There were also accusations that the standards were too tough for the lower grades.

    What’s your take? Are they too tough? And will adoption of these standards lead to more testing on top of all that kids already do?