Daniel Lapin’s Farcical Hebrew Claims

I was flipping channels the other day and I came across the end of a Benny Hinn show with Rabbi Daniel Lapin, who is simply bugnutty. And this video starts at almost the exact point that I stopped on the channel. It’s a hilarious discussion of the human hand and how it adds up to 14 (What? Yeah, just watch). It’s all Hebrew numerology bullshit and it’s really quite absurd.


About Ed Brayton

After spending several years touring the country as a stand up comedian, Ed Brayton tired of explaining his jokes to small groups of dazed illiterates and turned to writing as the most common outlet for the voices in his head. He has appeared on the Rachel Maddow Show and the Thom Hartmann Show, and is almost certain that he is the only person ever to make fun of Chuck Norris on C-SPAN.

  • John Pieret

    Heh! When I first read that I thought you said “the end of a Benny Hill show with Rabbi Daniel Lapin.”

    It would have been a more appropriate forum for Lapin.

  • http://thebronzeblog.wordpress.com/ Bronze Dog

    I always think of Benny Hill whenever Benny Hinn comes up. Hill is more dignified.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    John Pieret & Bronze Dog, plus Yakkity Sax.

  • gertzedek

    Oy. Per Wikipedia, ‘Lapin was one of the Jewish voices in support of Mel Gibson’s controversial film The Passion of the Christ, and was a strong supporter of the efforts by Terri Schiavo’s parents to keep their daughter alive. He is also a strong supporter of Pope Pius XII as a righteous gentile, a term he believes should be renamed “righteous Christian”.’ This man is a disgrace to Judaism and a defender of anti-semites.

    (For those who don’t know, Pius XII =” Hitler’s pope”, who turned a blind eye to the Holocaust.)

    Sadly, though, this type of numerology (called gematria) is altogether to common among Jewish mystics and fundamentalists.

  • Hercules Grytpype-Thynne

    I loves me some magickal thinking.

  • raven

    (For those who don’t know, Pius XII =” Hitler’s pope”, who turned a blind eye to the Holocaust.)

    Oh great Cthulhu, Pacelli, Hitler’s Pope.

    Pius XII negotiated a deal with the Nazis, the Reichskonkordat, that greatly aided their rise to power.

    Oddly enough, the Reichskonkordat survived WWII and is still the law in Germany.

    Pacelli probably wasn’t a raving antisemite but he was indifferent to the Jews at best and more likely mildly disliked them.

  • evilDoug

    Of course he doesn’t count any of the carpometacarpal joints, and most notably omits that of the thumb – the one joint whose freedom contributes hugely to the opposability of the human thumb.

  • Randomfactor

    See, now, Ed, you’ve fallen for a hoax. Benny Hinn is actually a Jon Lovitz character. It explains the whols schtick.

    Yeah, that’s the ticket.

  • brianwestley

    Lapin is the same chucklehead who said all atheists are “parasites”.

  • unemployedphilosopher

    I made it three minutes in before my left eye started twitching and, for some reason, I tasted key lime pie.

    While I generally enjoy key lime pie, I don’t think I’ll watch any more of that.