Dumbass Quote of the Day

Judson Phillips of Tea Party Nation isn’t the sharpest knife in the drawer, to say the least. Which is why no one should be surprised by this juvenile tweet:

Sports teams are named after something admired.That’s why there is no sports team named the Democrats or the liberals.

Right. Unlike all those sports teams named the Republicans or the conservatives. Be quiet, Judson; adults are talking.

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  • John Pieret

    But don’t forget the New York Teapartiers!

  • Al Dente

    An argument could be made that the University of Callifornia-Santa Cruz Banana Slugs commemorate conservatives.

  • http://composer99.blogspot.ca composer99

    As the elementary school I spent grades 4 through 8 in changed its mascot/team name to ‘Walrus’ (when it was originally ‘Falcon’) I beg to differ.

    (To be fair, walruses are impressive, awesome creatures. But hardly as admirable, from a sports team context, as falcons, except perhaps for swimming competitions.)

  • Chiroptera

    And yet in the last election the Democrat was reelected President and a majority of votes went to Democratic Candidates in the House elections. Funny, that.

  • Alverant

    Phillips is wrong! The Patriots is the name of a sports team.

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    Knife? He’s not even a spoon.

  • kantalope

    Why aren’t we electing more Tigers to the House of Representatives? At least with the napping and the pooping and the roaring something would be getting done. GO TIGERS!

  • dogmeat

    As a member of the Oneida Nation, and the “honor” of being a mascot, I’m all for changing Washington’s team to the Republicans. We can have a fat-ass slob in a Rascal scooter as their mascot. We could make the Chiefs into a Conservatives, mascot could be a self righteous bigot in a Klan outfit holding a cross.

  • eric

    Sports teams are named after something admired.

    Raiders. Buccaneers. Titans. Stars. Senators (!!!). Wizards (and, previously, Bullets). Nationals. Capitals. Boilermakers. Redwings. Then there’s the Kontinental hockey league: tractors, locomotives, automobiles, dynamos, metallurgists…

  • Reginald Selkirk

    Miami Hurricanes. Tulsa Golden Hurricane. Karatedo Typhoon. Iowa State Cyclones. Santa Cruz Banana Slugs. Alabama Crimson Tide. Kampala City Council. Fotballaget Fart (linked because you wouldn’t believe me.) Yuma City Criminals. Watersmeet Nimrods. Yeah, these are all things that are admired.


    And don’t forget the Tennessee Volunteers. Most volunteers are probably liberals.

  • vicvanity

    “As a member of the Oneida Nation, and the “honor” of being a mascot, I’m all for changing Washington’s team to the Republicans. We can have a fat-ass slob in a Rascal scooter as their mascot. ”

    I get to be a mascot ?

  • oranje

    I want to make a Tea Party/turd joke with the Browns, but I’m not awake enough and I don’t want my fog to make something sound racist. So: turd, Tea Party, Browns. Back to bed with me.

  • Mr Ed

    I’m not a big sports fan so I missed the Fighting Jesuses or the God[s] -what is the plural of a singular deity?

  • dogmeat

    I get to be a mascot ?

    I guess if you self identify as a fat slob on a Rascal scooter, sort of. I’d have to say it’s not all it’s cracked up to be, I especially love the “But you don’t look like an Indian” like I’m supposed to be running around with warpaint and a headdress, ’cause I’m a warrior don’tcha know? But hey, you’re “admired.”

  • kantalope

    Don’t forget the Fighting Ichabods of Washburn University: GO Ichabods!


  • Mr Ed

    #8 Dogmeat.

    Your idea of changing teams to represent Republicans, conservatives or the tea party got my imagination going and I don’t think it would work. I think crowds of fans waving poorly spelled signs, shouting nonquitors and arguing that the rules are biased would detract from the game being played. It does make for some amusing mental images. “Fans are reminded to sign us for the seventh inning Hoveround race around the diamond the winner will get a six month supply of MREs for the bunker.”

  • kantalope

    ” …crowds of fans waving poorly spelled signs, shouting non-sequiturs and arguing that the rules are biased…”

    So, just like the real Congress.

  • hunter

    I guess Chicago must really love the gays — we have the Bears and the Cubs.

  • scienceavenger

    @16 We could have the Minnesota Morans.

    Also don’t forget the Colorado Avalanche, Miami Heat, Marshall Thundering Herd, Ole Miss Rebels, and of course, the dumbest name in sports, the Buffalo Bills.

  • doublereed

    Yea, like the Redskins and the Chiefs.

  • unemployedphilosopher


    You’re right. He’s more like that half-melted spatula at the back of the drawer that you just never get around to throwing out.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    [Conservative mascot comes out, stands on the 1st Base line. Stops the other team’s runners from reaching First. Shouts “No!”. Stops own team from reaching First. Shouts “No!”. Insists to umpires that’s how the Founding Father, Ted Baseball, meant game to be played]

  • busterggi

    Albany River Rats – go Rats!

  • http://riffingreligion.wordpress.com/ Wes

    Then there’s the Wake Forest Demon Deacons and the Duke Blue Devils. I guess people in North Carolina admire demons and devils?

  • eric

    Demon Deacons and Blue Devils. NC is infested with Satan-admirers!

  • Skip White

    busterggi @23 –

    Aren’t they the Charlotte Checkers now? And what the hell is a Checker anyway? Oh well, whatever, Hershey Bears fan here.

  • gorypdx

    In Portland we have the Jefferson HS Democrats…. mascot is a donkey.

    Perhaps not the most academically rigorous school, but they won state in basketball a couple years ago.

  • gearloose

    Detroit’s Pissed-Ons

  • colnago80

    Re doubleread @ #20

    A change of name to the Deadskins would be highly appropriate.

  • Synfandel

    Who doesn’t admire mudhens?

  • arakasi

    I always figured that the University of Hawaii Rainbow Warriors gave conservatives dyspepsia

  • illdoittomorrow

    Scienceavenger @ 19,

    “…the dumbest name in sports, the Buffalo Bills.”

    No, the Calgary Hitmen is the worst name. Definitely something to be admired though, right?

  • http://polrant@blogspot.com democommie

    I wonder if some of those eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevul Sorosbillions could be used to bribe the Dallas Cowboys to change their name to the “Chickenhawks” to honor Shrubya and the Dorklord Cheney.

  • konrad_arflane

    Fotballaget Fart (linked because you wouldn’t believe me.)

    Oh, I believe you. I also happen to know what “fart” means in Norwegian (“speed”), so I didn’t find it quite so funny.

    Not that I don’t find fart jokes funny – that particular fart joke is just pretty old when you know your Scandinavian 😉