‘Ex-Gays’: ‘End Homosexuality and Prevent Bullying’

One of the disingenuous claims we hear from the “ex-gay” crowd is that they just want people to have a choice to change their sexual orientation (which doesn’t work, of course). But a recent fundraising letter from the International Healing Foundation, an “ex-gay” clinic, reveals the real goal:

Announcing THE END OF HOMOSEXUALITY Want to Know How?

Want to be part of an exciting revolution? Want to end homosexuality and prevent bullying? Want to protect your children and grandchildren?

Everyday our kids are being inundated with false information about homosexuality-born that way and cannot change. This is both scientifically and scripturally untrue.

Their claims have always been disingenuous because the same people who say we don’t want to force all gay people to change, we only want them to have the option if they want to change also then argue that the fact that some people can change means all people can become straight and therefore gay rights should not be protected. But it’s nice to hear them just come out and say it.

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  • …But it’s nice to hear them just come out and say it.

    How is it “nice?”

  • NitricAcid

    Just like the kids who beat me up in elementary school were just trying to prevent bullying, by giving me a reason to stop being a nerd and thus giving people a reason to bully me….

  • It’s nice in the way that it’s always nice when bigots come out and express their bigotry in the clearest, plainest language possible. When they don’t, it’s not possible to tell whether they genuinely are bigots but are simply too afraid to be recognized as such. Additionally, it’s a pain in the ass to argue against someone’s position over and over again only to discover that the reason your arguments have no effect is because it’s not actually their position, but one they made up because it sounds better than the truth.

  • MikeMa

    Even assuming it were true that sexual preference is a choice, why would it be any of my business (or theirs) to have them change against their will?

    Blaming the victim is all I see here.

  • eric

    How was this ‘real goal’ hidden or disingenuous? Wanting to end it and wanting people to choose not to do it are not logically contradictory – the first is a strategic goal, the other is a method or tactic for achieving the strategic goal. Here, I’ll give an analogy: I’d like to end theft. I’d like help people not need to steal to live comfortably, and not want to steal for other reasons. Are those two statements, when paired together, either hypcritical or disingenous?

    They’re voicing some nasty anti-gay bigotry. Their misinformation is damaging and should be fought. And they ARE disengenuous because we all pretty much know that they WOULD make it illegal if they could. But I don’t see much hypocrisy or inconsistency between the bolded statements and their claim that being gay is a choice.

  • Alverant

    So not only are they blaming the victim but they think all bullying is about homosexuality.

    Truly truly pathetic

  • Ex-gays? The ones that marched on DC a couple months ago and were stood up by Michelle Bachmann?

    All ten of them?

  • magistramarla

    On a related note: After much yelling, screaming and gnashing of teeth by the local bigots, the San Antonio City Council just passed a non-discrimination ordinance.


    I’m sure that the opponents are headed to their churches for an evening of mourning.

    Man, would I love to be attending the celebrations of the supporters!

  • When they don’t, it’s not possible to tell whether they genuinely are bigots but are simply too afraid to be recognized as such.

    Actually, yes, it is possible to see the real bigotry through their waffling, weasel-words and BS. I’ve been seeing through the BS of both Christian and libertarian bigots since the 1970s, without having to wait for them to lose the masks. It’s really not that hard.

  • Also, Gretchen and Ed, it’s not at all “nice” when bigots drop their pretenses, because that means they have reason to believe they can get away with saying whatever they want, and don’t have to worry about any reaction. There’s nothing at all “nice” about living in a society where the bigots don’t have to hide or use any discretion. That’s why no one here is saying how “nice” it is to check out the Slymepit.

  • This “tough love” stuff is so confusing and counter-intuitive. I guess only the god-benumbed can comprehend it.

  • davideriksen


    That’s fantastic. Fearing the worst, I’ve avoided the local news for the last few days.

  • What a bunch of evil assholes. It is nice to hear them come out and say it though, I agree.

  • lorn

    On the other hand … that claim may be something of a back hand psychological breakthrough for the homophobe community. If gay people can change to straight it seems entirely reasonable that the straight arrows could get over their obsession with what people do with their genitals by ‘taking a walk on the wild side’ . Given that it is such a simple and easy choice there would be no danger for such willfully upright and hard Christian men. They can always switch back. I’m sure after a dip in the warm waters exploring their sexuality they will be able to ‘give it up anytime they want’. Unless their excessive concerns over what others do with their genitals is really a manifestation of a latent desire. I think they need to swim the warm waters just to make sure.

  • Thumper; Immorally Inferior Sergeant Major in the Grand Gynarchy Mangina Corps (GGMC)

    This is both scientifically and scripturally untrue.

    The first is a lie, the second is irrelevant.

  • @3:

    I think it’s been sufficiently established that you are a nicer person than I am, Gretchen (no, that is not meant as a dig or snark). Having said that, I have no difficulty with telling who are bigots and who are people who grew up in bigotry and have worked to get over it. When dealing with the former I prefer “You’re full of shit, you fucking bigot” to long, involved arguments.

  • lofgren

    This is like when the mobsters walk into a store and say, “Nice place you got here. Shame if something happened to it.” Please get help for your gayness. We’d hate to have to keep bullying you like this.

  • John Allman

    “the ‘ex-gay’ crowd … just want people to have a choice to change their sexual orientation (which doesn’t work, of course)”

    Firstly, this is a pretty bad example of belittling an entire demographic, if “the ‘ex-gay’ crowd is supposed to refer to people who have been drawn to and have practised homosexuality, in the past, but are not drawn to homosexuality now, nor practise it.

    Secondly, it is also a bad example of a straw man argument. Nobody ex-gay whom I have ever come across believes that sexual orientation is a real biological characteristic of a human or any other mammalian specimen, other than when defined in terms of behaviour. So somebody “ex-gay” would be unlikely to say that, other than as a shorthand for expressing a far more sophisticated idea, in an attempt to communicate with others more simplistic who *do* believe that the mythical “sexual orientation” really does exist.

    Thirdly, when sexual orientation is defined behaviourally, either in terms of sexual behaviour, or self-identification, it is plainly untrue (of course) to assert that changing one’s behaviourally-defined sexual orientation “doesn’t work”.

    Of course, reducing the prevalence of homosexual behaviour in the population to zero is an unrealistic goal. However, it is undeniable that “kids are being inundated with false information about homosexuality”. That everybody who has practised homosexuality was “born that way and cannot change” really is “both scientifically and scripturally untrue”.

    I do not know the writer of the fundraising letter quoted, but his or her agenda is not that of most former practisers of homosexuality. Most of us just want to be accepted, not erased as though we didn’t exist (like those who identify as bisexual, but more so), and often called names and discriminated against in life-wrecking ways. See a webpage I only discovered myself today,


    for some vivid examples of the abuse that those who used to practise homosexuality have been subjected to over the years.