Alex Jones: It’s All About Me

Someone shot a bunch of people at the Washington Navy Yard on Monday, so Alex Jones, never one to stray from the script, immediately and with no evidence whatsoever, declared it a false flag operation. Then when an arrest was made, he went on a rant about how it’s all about him.

“You better believe that even if they’re just pure jihadis that did this, even connected to Al-Qaeda groups out of the Middle East being commanded by the leader of Al-Qaeda last Friday to attack the United States… even if that’s the case, you can believe, like the last three or four cases, they’re going to try to connect it to and yours truly, part of the long-term demonization campaign,” Jones explained…

“If you want to wonder how big this radio show is, even separate from the website, it’s the fact that they try to pin, I’d say, about half the major crimes, we get brought into it,” he insisted. “It’s because we’ve got their number, we know who the globalists are, we know what their program is. And they’re very concerned that we be discredited so that people will not look at what we cover on the radio show, the Infowars nightly news and on the websites.”

Jones added that the circumstances of Monday’s shooting had “patsy written all over it.”

Uh, Alex…”they” — you know, the globalists, the Illuminati, the Freemasons, the barbershop quartet champions from Bugtussle or whoever the hell else you’re ranting incoherently about at any given moment, have never blamed any situation like this on you. You’ve been made fun of for doing exactly what you’re doing now, which is immediately declare a vast conspiracy with no evidence to back it up. If that discredits you, you have only yourself to blame. When you declare that everything from your own birth to the moon landing is false flag operation, it’s going to make you look pretty goddamn stupid.

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  • Has anyone with any establishment connections actually tried to blame any shootings on Alex Jones? Other, less-famous, conspiracy theorists are all I’m aware of.

  • garnetstar

    Delusions, dissociation from reality, and ideas of reference are classic symptoms of schizophrenia.

  • freehand

    Has it occurred to Alex Jones that he might be a false flag operation? How does he know that he’s taking orders from the right voices? Maybe it’s not God and common sense that he hears, but rather CIA implanted thoughts.

  • Trebuchet

    Alex is nuts.

    No arrest has been made, by the way, the shooter is dead.

  • If Alex Jones wasn’t involved in the Real Conspiracy, then why is he so quick to assert his “innocence” and push the blame on others so loudly? Real American Patriots® want, nay, deserve the Truth!

  • dan4

    What’s a “globalist?”

  • escuerd

    I initially associated Jones with the idiotic sites that 9/11 truthers would always reference. The first time I actually saw him, the first thing that came to my mind was schizophrenia (though he was so manic, I really wouldn’t venture a guess as to what combination of disorders is behind his deranged persona).

    He is clearly mentally ill, and while I don’t think that’s the kind of thing that someone ought to be condemned or made fun of for, Jones is such a douchey, hateful, grandiose asshole that I can’t feel too bad about making fun of him.

  • dingojack

    “If you want to wonder how big this radio show is, even separate from the website,….”

    What’s Mr Jones’ ratings numbers I wonder? Or are they too a vast conspiracy to bring him down?


  • Every time I read or hear something about this guy, I become more convinced that this man likely has serious psychological problems. A part of me wonders if he’s got something like Histrionic Personality Disorder or Pseudologia fantastica.

  • @9:

    Absent competent diagnosis, I’m gonna go with Assholius Totalicus.

  • Mr. Jones: Can you prove that you are not a false flag operation? I claim that you have been set up by the government/Illuminati/Bilderbergers/Tri-Lateral Commission and the kitchen staff at the Betty Crocker Institute in order to distract from the real conspiracies. You rant and rave and are so ridiculously over-the-top that nobody takes information about true conspiracies seriously.

  • Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden

    Okay, I listened to that thing.

    I was reminded eerily of Prothero in V for Vendetta. I always knew that he couldn’t be the only one out there propagandizing that fictional England. Just the most elevated. And he got very rant-like at his worst. The number 2 guy in the ministry of information could have been Alex Jones.

  • zero6ix

    So that’s what Glenn Beck would look like all hopped up on meth. Good to know.