‘America Needs a White Republican President’

Kevin Jackson, one of those infamous black wingnuts, writes on his website that America needs a white president. And he reassures the many white people who agree with him, like Joe the Plumber, that it’s not at all racist for them to think or say that.

Admit it. You want a white Republican president again.

Now before you start feeling like you’re a racist, understand you are not.

Wanting a white Republican president doesn’t make you racist, it just makes you American.

In the pre-black president era, criticizing the president was simply the American thing to do. An exercise of one’s First Amendment right. Criticism had nothing to do with color, because there had never been a black president, or at least one whom people recognized as black.

So to criticize the president meant that you didn’t like his policies.

The election of a recognized black president was not supposed to change anything. In fact, it was supposed to (1) ease any perceived racial tensions, and (2) allow the government to focus on legislating without race. So America would be more free than ever to discuss the issues.

Not the case. And that is why having a white Republican president is best for the country.

And Martin Luther King wept.

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About Ed Brayton

After spending several years touring the country as a stand up comedian, Ed Brayton tired of explaining his jokes to small groups of dazed illiterates and turned to writing as the most common outlet for the voices in his head. He has appeared on the Rachel Maddow Show and the Thom Hartmann Show, and is almost certain that he is the only person ever to make fun of Chuck Norris on C-SPAN.

  • MikeMa

    I think mandating black presidents until the wingnuts STFU or die is the way to go.

  • http://www.electricminstrel.com Brett McCoy

    America needs a Latino atheist lesbian president.

  • coragyps

    Dammit! We tried a white Republican president in 2000 – and look how that turned out!

  • Childermass

    Dear racists and those who pander to them for political and/or financial reasons,

    America needs a president. We elect one every four years. You lost the last two elections fair and square. Stop whining about it.

  • http://www.gregory-gadow.net Gregory in Seattle

    Because all of the recent white Republicans have worked out so well.

  • Rip Steakface

    I think we should simply follow Lady Gaga’s suggestion and have a black white beige chola descent Lebanese Oriental president.

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    Wanting a white Republican president doesn’t make you racist, it just makes you American.

    Well, that kinda puts a dent in the “America is not a racist nation” narrative…

  • abb3w

    Wanting a white Republican president doesn’t make you racist; being racist makes you want a white Republican president. Such wanting thus implies you are more likely to be racist, since racists disproportionately tend to prefer having a white Republican president, while non-racists tend to not give a damn.

    Cue correlation-versus-causation XKCD comic….

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    And the GOP minority outreach program continues. Still, it’s nice that they found a minority to advocate against minorities.*

    * “We got one!” ~ GOP

  • Ryan Jean

    A _Republican_ President hasn’t been the best thing for this nation since before my Grandparents were children trying to survive the Great Depression. Everything since then has only made it a _worse_ thing year-by-year to do so.

  • greg1466

    In the pre-black president era,…Criticism had nothing to do with color

    Wow. So no one complained about any of our black presidents before the first one. Now that’s some insight right there. See, the GOP really is the intelligent party.

  • The Beautiful Void

    @9 Modus:

    Blame Herman Cain. The wingnuts supported him, and after he lost, they went sour-grapes on the idea of a black president.

  • zippythepinhead

    Nixon: Secret bombing of Cambodia, Watergate

    Reagan: Iran-Contra scandal, deficit increased from ~30% to >50% of GDP

    Bush I: 1st US-Iraq war, deficit increased to > 60% of GDP

    Bush II: 2nd US-Iraq war, deficit increased > 80% of GDP, great recession

  • raven

    Obama isn’t black.

    His mother was white which makes him…half white.

    Someone can ask Kevin Jackson if a half white president will work. Someone who gives one rat’s ass what Kevin Jackson claims to think..

  • dogmeat

    In the pre-black president era, criticizing the president was simply the American thing to do.

    Actually, it usually resulted in you getting slammed for hating America, apple pie, and eagles. I can’t even begin to count the times I was told that I had to “respect” the office, etc. etc., during the Bush years. Apparently that whole “respect the office” thing fell out of favor in January ’09. I’m sure it’s just a coincidence.

  • Jordan Genso

    @13 zippythepinhead

    I think you are equating ‘deficit’ and ‘debt’.

  • sigurd jorsalfar

    Zippy, the great Bush recession wasn’t caused by the national debt or ‘deficit’ as you mistakenly refer to it. It was caused by an almost totally unregulated and fraud-filled financial sector combined with an unsustainable level of private debt.

  • caseloweraz

    To paraphrase Larry Niven, this country needs a white Republican president like a fish needs a bicycle.

    Kevin Jackson needs a functioning brain like this country needs a functioning House of Representatives.

  • tubi

    So the solution to the (legitimate) problem is to get rid of the cause of the problem, i.e. the black guy, rather than for the TP racists to quit being so fucking racist.

    Makes sense.

  • Pieter B, FCD

    “Like a fish needs a bicycle” is not a Larry Niven coinage. I had thought until today that it was Florynce Kennedy, but it apparently was not.

  • scienceavenger

    or at least one whom people recognized as black

    Is that a reference to Clinton?

  • http://www.facebook.com/eo.raptor.3 eoraptor

    Raven @ 14… Obama is half white…

    In the infamous Plessy v. Ferguson* case, Plessy was 7/8th white, and his black heritage was “… not visible upon him.” Nevertheless, under Louisiana law, Plessy coounted as black, and was required to ride in the “colored” car.

    Bigotry knows no bounds.

    *For the furriners among us, Plessy v. Ferguson established the separate but “equal” doctrine.

  • Nick Gotts


    I wondered about that. WTF could he possibly mean?


    Exactly. The test for whether a person is black, in the USA, is whether they would have had to ride in the “coloured” car, or at the back of the bus.

  • John Pieret

    In the pre-black president era, criticizing the president was simply the American thing to do.

    Um … in case you haven’t noticed, Mr. Jackson, Obama being black hasn’t exactly slowed down the criticism he has gotten from the right. The Value Voters Summit just spent an entire weekend doing nothing but criticizing Obama. Once again, a wingnut living in an alternative universe.

  • felidae

    I get it: using a race test for a presidential election proves we are a post racial society–stupidity is obviously colorblind

  • http://www.pandasthumb.org Area Man

    So, let me get this straight. It is totally not racist to want a white president because when we got a black president, it turned out that his skin color was a huge distraction thanks to racists, so you’re not a racist if your plan is to give into those racists and give them what they want. Or something.

  • Chiroptera

    John Pieret, #24: …Obama being black hasn’t exactly slowed down the criticism he has gotten from the right.

    Nor from the left, come to think about it.

    Wanting a white Republican president doesn’t make you racist…

    Actually, it does. It just does.

  • John Pieret

    Chiroptera @ 27:

    Nor from the left, come to think about it.

    You’re correct. The only difference is that the left, for the most part, criticizes him for what he’s actually done or failed to do.

  • exdrone

    In the pre-black president era

    Era >= 4 years. Who knew? So was the era of the dinosaurs shorter than I thought? Maybe the YECs are correct.

  • caseloweraz

    Pieter B: “Like a fish needs a bicycle” is not a Larry Niven coinage.

    OK, no argument. But I’m sure he used it in one of his novels. I think it was A World Out of Time.

  • http://polrant@blogspot.com democommie

    “‘America Needs a White Republican President’”

    Depending on assigned values for “White” and “Republican” (along a spectrum of Eisenhower to Bush, the douche) I’d say that we have something like a 50-75% “White Republican” PotUS, already.

    Maybe we’re not getting where he’s going with this and he just really wants to repeal the 22nd Amendment?