Charles Pierce is probably my single favorite columnist today. He can be brutal, but usually with great justification. In a new column he takes on Sarah Palin’s recitation of a plagiarized viral email with a rewritten Green Eggs and Ham at CPAC.
Yesterday she gave a wildly received speech to ring down the curtain at CPAC. The applause, as far as I know, may still be going on. It was as singularly embarrassing a public address as any allegedly sentient primate ever has delivered. It was a disgrace to politics, to rhetoric, to the English language, and to seventh-grade slam books everywhere.
This ambulatory bag of rank resentment pulled out all the tricks. The cheap shots; “Aw, John, why the long face?” to the Secretary of State. The sneering, wheedling playground taunting — “You can’t make a phone call without Michelle Obama knowing, ‘This is the third time this week you dialed Pizza Hut Delivery'” — and a full panoply of funny voices that are the trademark of dipshit comics in every two-drink minimum club in America. We got “hope and channng-ey,” and how “some members” of the GOP establishment are saying to us, “Hush, America. Go to sleep, little lambs.” And, in what is being celebrated as the piece de resistance , she turned Green Eggs And Ham into an extended taunt…
If you laughed, you’re an idiot and I feel sorry for you.
We even got the inevitable gloat. Back five years ago, somebody wrote down on a little card for her that allowing the Russians to invade Georgia — as though there was anything we could have done about that — would embolden Vladimir Putin to move on Ukraine. She dutifully read it in public and now, of course, she is the smartest geopolitical mind in the country…
In 2008, we should remember, she wasn’t sure how many Koreas there were, thought Saddam Hussein was behind the 9/11 attacks, and was unclear whether or not Africa was a country. So, in an act of Christian charity, I will grant that some anonymous staffer, who very likely has only now recovered from the serious heroin habit he developed while working with Palin on foreign policy in 2008, was slightly clairvoyant about the intentions of the Putin government. Well done, unsung hero. If you respect her knowledge of anything beyond where her next speaking fee is coming from, you’re an idiot and I feel sorry for you.
Ouch. But well deserved.