Perkins: God Answered Prayer With Court Ruling

A whole lot of stupid things have been said about the Supreme Court’s ruling in Greece v Galloway by the Christian right. Naturally, Tony Perkins wants to add his name to the list of those staying stupid things. He says the ruling was an answer to prayer!

Monday’s U.S. Supreme Court ruling wasn’t just an answer on prayer—it was an answer to prayer! In what experts are calling one of the biggest religious liberty wins in the last half-century, the court gave its blessing on an American tradition more than 200 years old: legislative prayer. In cities across America, secular activists have come to legal blows with dozens of local governments over the freedom to open meetings with a prayer, recognizing the Author of our liberty.

Okay Tony, tell us specifically what all those prayers did. Millions of people undoubtedly prayed for this outcome to happen, but millions of people pray for the outcome of Supreme Court cases all the time when they lose too. So what exactly did God do here? Was there a justice who was going to vote the other way but God put the mojo on them and changed their mind? If so, what happened to that free will thing you like to blather on about? And if not, if that result was going to happen anyway, then the prayer didn’t do anything. Take your pick.

One look at the headlines and we can all agree: If there’s one thing this country could use more of, it’s prayer!

Nope, we can’t all agree on that. I’m old school. What this country needs is more animal sacrifice, especially in the form of BBQ.

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  • Kevin Kehres

    So let me get this straight. God answered a prayer about a court case about prayer by … doing what exactly?

    And seriously, if this is the only type of prayer god answers — one that encourages more prayer over actually doing something — then god has a self-esteem issue.

    Why does god need to be prayed to anyway?

  • Marcus Ranum

    All those court rulings against, those were god’s will, too?

  • StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return!

    In cities across America, secular activists have come to legal blows with dozens of local governments over the freedom to open meetings with a prayer, recognizing the Author of our liberty.

    So George Washington has been made a god now like the Caesars of old?

    After all, he’s usually the one most considered the Author of the United States liberty from England or have i got my admittedly rather poor knowledge of ancient US history wrong?

    But isn’t that kinda not traditionally Christian – sainthood which jus’ain’t quite da same aside?

  • Synfandel

    Maybe this time they prayed to Saint Antonin and Saint Clarence.

  • cptdoom

    I’m sure all the starving refugees in war-torn countries are happy God took the time to ensure a bunch of small-town hicks get to pray in Jayzus’ name.

  • Stevarious, Public Health Problem

    Well, you see. God is omnipotent but not omniscient. He’s only able to hear and answer every billionth prayer or so, and from this extremely tiny slice of human experience, he’s received a pretty dim view of humanity.

    “Jesus! ANOTHER prayer to fix a sporting event? I’m omnipotent! I could cure all disease, or remove all hardship, and all I get are requests to fix elections and sway court cases and rig sporting events and games of chance! And when they DO bother to ask for something good, they only ask it for one person that they personally care about! These humans are a selfish lot!”

    “Well, it’s better than the old days, isn’t it dad? Back then it was all, ‘Please let Boar tribe die of poop-too-much sickness!’ or ‘Please let Grok get eat by pointy tooth tiger so me can have his mate!’ or ‘Please make the Roman emperors go crazy and destroy the empire from withing!’ or ‘Please kill Richard with a disease so terrible that they name it the Black Death and remember it forever!’ That’s improvement, right?”

    “Yeah, I guess. So what’s the next one? ‘Please make the Supreme Court approve prayers in legislative meetings.’ By Me, that’s so trivial and stupid! I can do literally ANYTHING and THIS is what they want?”

    “Really makes you regret promising not to do the flood thing again, eh?”

  • zero6ix

    Pretty telling when the infallible relies on the fallible to pass on infallible wisdom via fallible systems. The world’s worst game of telephone.