Wingnut: Ice Bucket Challenge a ‘Satanic Ritual’

Boy, if you thought the “don’t do the ice bucket challenge because they fund stem cell research” argument was stupid, you ain’t heard nothing yet. Selena Owens, a Worldnetdaily columnist, turns the idiot up to 11 and declares that the challenge is a “satanic ritual” designed to destroy Jesus. She bases it all on a ridiculous video by an evangelist named Anita Fuentes.

I also thought about why people would pour water over their heads. Sometimes the participants drench themselves, but typically someone else is designated to this task. Now I realize that being immersed in ice-cold water is quite a challenge to take, and it would definitely attract attention; I get it. However, I couldn’t put my finger on why this didn’t feel right to me – then I saw this video on Facebook. In the video, Evangelist Anita Fuentes breaks down an assortment of cryptic and cultic messages hidden in the IBC. It’s worth watching to decide for yourself if evil influences and symbolism are embedded within the IBC, or if Fuentes – as well as myself – is looking for ghosts behind every bush and a conspiracy behind every popular fad.

In particular, Fuentes’ video depicts the world-renowned cultic queen of talk, Oprah Winfrey, taking the IBC. Winfrey precedes her dousing with the words, “In the name of ALS and the Ice Bucket Challenge. …”[emphasis mine] Interesting choice of words.

Winfrey’s proclamation hit a nerve with me because Christians, myself included, routinely pray and make decrees “in the name of Jesus.” We specify whom we worship when we invoke prayer in Jesus’ name. However, because Oprah mistakenly believes the One True God is jealous of her, and the well-known fact that she denounces Jesus as the only way to God and basically considers herself to be a god, I found this statement to be very cultic in nature.

Fuentes also addresses the matter of pouring water over ones head and how that act directly correlates with water baptism and syncs the IBC with the sacred Christian deed of cleansing and purification, albeit, in a sacrilegious manner. She also delves into deep issues of rituals stemming from dark, cultic practices that encompass the IBC and which symbolically place America and Americans in a satanic ritual – with or without their knowledge.

Satanic ritual? Yes. Rituals abound in “Christian” America. Whenever spectators watch singers like Beyonce, JayZ, Rihanna, Lady Gaga and especially Nicki Minaj, they are indoctrinated and involved with blatantly satanic rituals that stem from the deep abyss of the occult. Some of these very same artists have taken the ALS IBC. Gaga doesn’t utter a word as she baptizes herself, arrayed in a sexy black leotard, sporting black lips, perched in an ornate black chair. Gaga doesn’t use a bucket; she instead uses a large silver bowl associated with pagan worship. Do you think she would take the IBC if it didn’t meet her pagan criteria? Not a chance.

The ALS IBC is ritualistic in nature. People are chosen to undergo a form of water baptism with cultic god Oprah leading the charge “in the name of ALS.” The Bible is clear: “You shall have no other gods before me” (Exodus 20:3). Oprah is a god to millions of Americans, and those who follow her doctrine and antics have tossed Jesus off the throne of their hearts – perhaps not intentionally … or perhaps so. Yet by following her seemingly innocent IBC decree, knowingly or not, they have cast Jesus off symbolically.

Gosh, why would anyone think that Owens and Fuentes are “looking for ghosts behind every bush and a conspiracy behind every popular fad”?

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  • http://howlandbolton.com richardelguru

    So Hell has frozen over?

  • sh3baproject

    lady, if the ice bucket challange was satanic ut would be the fire bucket challange. and the people doing it would be speaking backwards latin.

  • noe1951

    so – pouring water over your head can lead to satanic problems? hmmm – do these people never wash their hair?

  • dingojack

    Looking at the ‘silver lining’ — At least WhirledNutsDaily hasn’t realised that the Nazis did extensive (and totally unethical) research on the effects of hypothermia.

    Dingo

  • eric

    Whenever spectators watch singers like Beyonce, JayZ, Rihanna, Lady Gaga and especially Nicki Minaj, they are indoctrinated and involved with blatantly satanic rituals that stem from the deep abyss of the occult

    Now look, I’m no fan of their music, but that’s just silly. Blatantly satanic. I do not think blatantly means what you think it means. Or maybe what’s really bothering the fundie WASPs is Black, Black, Black, Catholic, Black.

  • matty1

    I wasn’t even aware Oprah had done it or that were fixed words involved. Anyway these people seem so soaked in their own petty religion they can’t even imagine that other people do and think things for reasons that are not about worship, obedience and ritual.

  • dhall

    So . . . these people think that Oprah has tossed aside Jebus to worship a disease called ALS . . ? And apparently neither Owens nor Fuentes is aware that some of the pagan mystery religions that predated Christianity employed baptism as part of the initiation into their faiths, and early Christians adopted the practice just as they borrowed winter solstice celebrations and spring fertility celebrations, among other things, including the death and return of the deity.

    Yeah, Owens, and yeah, Fuentes, you’re seeing satanic rituals behind every popular fad. Grow up.

  • Alverant

    Wait, I thought christians were into the “suffering makes you holy” meme. Jesus suffered ergo suffering brings you closer to god. That’s what Mother Theresa thought. So wouldn’t the sudden pain of getting drenched with ice water be a holy thing?

  • magistramarla

    I haven’t picked up an Oprah magazine in a while, but the last time I did, she was still spouting an annoying amount of religious claptrap in most everything that she wrote. She seems to pride herself on being very spiritual, and I believe that her roots are in the Baptist cult. These xtians really eat their own, don’t they?

  • colnago80

    Re dhall @ #7

    It is my recollection that John the Baptist baptized Yeshua ben Yusef of Nazareth. Hey, if it was good enough for Yeshua, it should be good enough for ole Selena.

  • scienceavenger

    I couldn’t put my finger on why this didn’t feel right to me

    Let me explain it to you. Here are otherwise rational people, apparently unmotivated to donate money to a perfectly good charity on its merits, somehow become more motivated to do so because someone else does something totally pointless. Could be walking in a circle, could be dumping water over one’s head, makes no difference, its just different variants of stupid. It’s proof positive a concept need not make any logical sense whatsoever to be effective. No devils needed.

  • anubisprime

    Seems someone is rather jealous if not resentful of Oprah and her massive audience.

    Just another xtian with issues of martyrdom while hobbling along the road to perdition, while others can afford to rent a limousine.

    Hatchet job is all, traditional in xtian circles, they love taking chunks out of each other, it is what they do!

  • dugglebogey

    Do fundamentalists play an elaborate game of “look what I can make them believe now?”

  • dugglebogey

    Next the baptists will sue the ALS group for violating their copyrights on the baptism ritual.

  • dhall

    #10 cologno80 – true, but people had been getting baptised into the mystery religion surrounding Isis, once she was imported to Greece from Egypt, as well as into the Eleusinian Mysteries, for centuries by then. In other words, John the Baptist wasn’t the original.

  • dhall

    Whoops, colagno80. Sorry about the misspelling.

  • Katie Anderson

    I found this gem posted to the FRC’s Facebook page recently:

    https://www.facebook.com/familyresearchcouncil/posts/10152690924892442

    “Hi Tony, I was listening to your broadcast today August 27. You had mentioned you took the ice bucket challenge and you challenged others. Please think about this. I was awakened to this several days ago by an evangelist preacher. This is a worldly thing. It seems innocent but it is not. You are becoming part of this world by doing this and I ask you to look at the list of people who took this challenge. Lady GAGA, Ophra Winfrey, Hilary Clinton, Basically every liberal and demonic rock star. Think about this, the terror group name is ISIS, When you do the ice bucket it is, ice us. We are not to be conformed to this world but to be transformed. I urge you to look at the list of celebrities who took part in this. Even Sarah Palin is deceived. Kathy A”

  • dhall

    #17 – Katie Anderson. Kind of priceless, isn’t it. Isis is the same as ‘ice us.’ I guess that would fall apart if we used the acronym ISIL then . . . Gotta admit, the person does seem out of touch with this world; i.e., reality.

  • Nemo

    At least she shows some self-awareness with the “looking for ghosts” line. Not quite enough, but maybe it’s a start.

  • Dark Jaguar

    When I first heard about the “ice bucket challenge”, I assumed it was the same as literally every other Youtube “challenge”, stupid kids doing something that’d probably get them killed for no reason at all (like eating way too much cinnamon). I was wrong, but could you blame me? At a certain point, when do I get to just stop looking into certain things because they just seem too much like a long string of pointlessness?

    But then, after seeing someone I actually respect do it, I decided to figure out why someone would do something like that. First, I found out it isn’t so severe as I assumed. Just a bucket of ice water (kinda… boring if truth be told). I also found out it was for charity.

    Huh… You see here’s my deal. I hate “races for the cure” and similar things going all the way back to when I was in school and forced to do pledge drives. I just… didn’t see the point. I was asking people to donate such and such money for something as arbitrary as how many times I ran around a track. Nothing would be accomplished. They wouldn’t even see me do it, but I was “held” to it. Why? Just… why?! Why do people do these things? I can’t help but want a more honest drive, just me saying “hey, donate this money”. Heck, even donating to get a physical prize like a tote bag is SOMETHING. I’ll donate to causes when I feel I have some money to spare and the charity is on the level, sure, but no, I really don’t care if you shave your head or run around or… dump ice down your back. I really don’t. Don’t do that for my sake. Here, just… just take a little more money and use it to buy some dignity, but don’t do that. Just… make your case and trust in people to do the right thing. No, don’t ask that question: “You aren’t willing to swallow a little pride or race around FOR THE CHILDRENS?!”, because it isn’t for the children, it’s for nobody, and it’s dumb, so let’s just focus on the actual drive.

    Now, Jon Stewert’s Ferguson challenge? That had a point! That was social satire that actually had a message. A bucket of ice water? Again… why? (Yes, I really don’t get social stuff. I never go to bars or parties because… they bore me. As a result I don’t run into any opportunities to stand up for people like I’m asked to do, so basically I make ZERO difference in changing society as I’m not really actively taking part in it.)

    … I’m really going to pay for this one…

  • Ichthyic

    or if Fuentes – as well as myself – is looking for ghosts behind every bush and a conspiracy behind every popular fad.

    yeah. that.

  • Ichthyic

    Or maybe what’s really bothering the fundie WASPs is Black, Black, Black, Catholic, Black.

    *ding* winner!

    it’s the very literal demonization of the hated other by authoritarian wankers.

  • DavidinOz

    Looks like the story I was told was wrong. I heard it was actually a secret Mormon plan to baptise the world. :-)

  • jnorris

    Anita Fuentes and Selena Owens dare to challenge William Tapley, Third Eagle of the Apocalypse and Co-Prophet of the End Times.

  • hexidecima

    SO, therefore the ritualistic dumping of icewater or Gatorade after a sports game must be a satanic ritual too.

    Alas, TrueChristians are so very very stupid.

  • vereverum

    So all these years when the cops were shouting “Stop in the name of the law”, they were talking about the Torah.

    Wow, whooda thunk it. If I’d’ve known that, I might’ve stopped.

    At least she didn’t mention Benghazi.

  • tbp1

    There is apparently absolutely nothing, the matter how innocuous or even silly, that WND won’t denounce as demonic, Nazi, or both.

  • Michael Heath

    A wingnut:

    Even Sarah Palin is deceived.

    Impossible.

  • Chiroptera

    In the video, Evangelist Anita Fuentes breaks down an assortment of cryptic and cultic messages hidden in the IBC.

    And sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

  • howardhershey

    Methinks she is in need of a cold shower.

  • grumpyoldfart

    At least nobody believes her. Well, apart from a few hundred million American fundies…

  • samgardner

    Dark Jaguar,

    You are right, it is irrational. So what? People themselves aren’t wholly rational, and if they need some irrational excuse to get excited about something that they rationally should be excited about, then that’s fine in my book.

  • Artor

    Look at this baby being dedicated to Satan through this evil ritual!

    http://www.pravoslavie.ru/sas/image//101528/152895.x.jpg

  • dingojack

    Ator – to be fair, the kid sure looks like it’s got ‘666’ tattooed on it’s butt.

    Dingo

  • matty1

    @33 Satan, God it’s hard to tell the difference. I think Satan is the one with a lower body count.

    @20 There are decent objections to this challenge, it may divert funds from other charities, many people who do it think the ice water is an alternative to donating, it encourages water waste. All of these have a point, complaining that people do not share your motivations and view of rationality I just don’t see. You ask “What is accomplished” by such things, surely that is obvious – a donation to the charity in question. I’d turn it round and ask what is lost by people also gaining pleasure from the process of fundraising?

  • lofgren

    It’s a game. You don’t have to play, but bitching about other people playing it is about the most dickish thing you can do. Well, besides accusing them of being Satanists anyway.

  • eric

    Huh… You see here’s my deal. I hate “races for the cure” and similar things going all the way back to when I was in school and forced to do pledge drives. I just… didn’t see the point. I was asking people to donate such and such money for something as arbitrary as how many times I ran around a track. Nothing would be accomplished.

    With standard ‘Race for the…” things, you’re paying someone to do exercise. Most of us need to do more of that anyway, so promising to give money to a charity if one of your friends gets slightly more in shape is at least giving your money for two good things.

    The ice bucket challenge is more like a dunk tank. Entertainment spending. You’re paying for some mostly harmless schaudenfreude. It relies on a bit of human psychology that makes little objective or rational sense (why do most of us enjoy a little schaudenfreude?), but the business/charity idea to offer that commodity for a price makes perfect sense to me.