Rick Joyner Goes to Heaven

Christian con man Rick Joyner got sick recently and thinks he went to heaven to talk to God for 8 hours. Well, he says he thinks this. He might just be lying to fleece his followers for more money. That would certainly not be an unexpected behavior from a fraud like him.


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  • dingojack

    Evidently, even god didn’t want him.


  • sh3baproject

    dingo, god did want him. he just had problems with the soul teleporter infinity. apparently its running low on dead innocents.

  • dingojack

    sh3baproject – he should borrow Allah’s.


  • raven

    If god spent 8 hours talking to Rick Joyner, he is totally bored and has no life.

    Even most humans couldn’t be bothered to do that. It’s not like Joyner has much interesting or worthwhile to say.

  • sh3baproject

    god is not on speaking terms with allah ever since allah decided to end god’s favorite empire.

  • dingojack

    Allah favoured the Babylonians then the Romans but only revealed himself to a merchant of Medina 600 years later.

    Bashful ain’t he?

    😉 Dingo

  • notruescott

    Translation into sane person speak:

    “I had this really weird fever dream last night”.

  • dingojack

    notruescott – Or perhaps — ‘…after half a bottle of cough syrup the ‘hillbilly heroin’ really started to kick in…’

    :) Dingo

  • John Pieret

    In another video at RWW, Joyner says he learned that there is no Ebola virus in heaven (wha?) and that some Christians have such “authority” over Ebola that people with the disease who are in the same room with these Christians are instantaneously cured. Uh, Rick … could you round some of these people up and get them tickets to Liberia?

  • busterggi

    I saw similar testimony in the past. That guy liked the hair replacement so much he bought the company.

  • Chiroptera

    And he came back? Damn!

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Chiroptera “And he came back? Damn!”

    God eventually recognized him. St Peter was quite apologetic about the whole thing.

  • dhall

    So . . . he thought maybe he had the bird flu and Ebola–or maybe food poisoning–and he thought maybe he went to heaven–or maybe it was just a prophetic dream. Maybe he ought to make up his mind. The applause was a little tepid when he said he was bringing heaven to earth too. Then again, he didn’t describe the place very well.

  • evodevo

    Didn’t Oral Roberts pull this one in 1987? Oh, wait, he said g-d would kill him if his followers didn’t cough up $8 mil or something. Never did visit “heaven”.

  • John Pieret


    Chiroptera “And he came back? Damn!”

    God eventually recognized him. St Peter was quite apologetic about the whole thing.

    I can’t imagine how you get around the house with all the internets laying about here and there!