I always laugh when Tucker Carlson takes a stand for traditional, macho notions of masculinity because, obviously, he could hardly be further from them himself. In what was a truly weird segment on the Fox News weekend morning show, he said that smoking is a “symbol of freedom and masculinity,” while one of his co-hosts told female cartoon characters, “If you’ve got it, flaunt it.”
Last week, leaked photos from the studios of animator Genndy Tartakovsky showed what the updated CGI-animated Popeye would look like.
“Without the iconic anchor tattoo and the smoking pipe!” Fox News host Clayton Morris announced on Sunday. “Are they wussifying Popeye?”
“Of course, they’re wussifying,” co-host Tucker Carlson agreed. “Nothing is scarier to a modern liberal than tobacco. If Popeye were driving around giving the morning after [birth control] pill to fourth graders, that would be totally fine.”
“But smoking a pipe, a symbol of freedom and masculinity in America itself, the reason this country exists, tobacco, that’s like, ‘Oh, that’s outrageous. That’s a major sin.’”
Morris was angry that Wonder Woman was wearing a “pantsuit” instead of “short-shorts.”
“Some people would say that this is an important thing that we’re not sexualizing these women so much,” Kooiman noted. “It’s the same for men. I mean, we make sure they have perfect figures, actually larger-than-life better.”
“That’s a good Islamic point,” Carlson snarked. “We should cover them. We should cover the women because, otherwise, it just incites the men. It’s immodest as we say in the Sharia.”
“I want to see Wonder Woman in the original short-shorts, and the halter top,” Morris whined.
“I think she looks great,” Kooiman observed. “I actually like that outfit better.”
“If you’ve got the body, flaunt it,” Morris replied. “That’s what I always say.”
Uh, dumbass…it’s a cartoon character. It doesn’t actually have a body.