Glenn Beck Returns to the Blackboard to Explain Everything

Oh goody! Glenn Beck has once again pulled out his trusty blackboard to deliver a weird, rambling, incoherent “explanation” of how World War III — the one he’s been predicting with completely different scenarios for a couple years now — is going to start. I love for this shit.


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  • Marcus Ranum

    You know, there could be cool contest here — a “make a video using Beck’s chart” contest.

    As I interpret that, the US is due for serious frottage from radical islam, then it will move down the alimentary canal and grow tumescent, into hard fascism. After a refractory period, it will soften and take on water and turn into a soft fascist stool. The stool will trigger a “call to arms” when it reaches the transverse colon and trigger global depression in the form of a massive ‘Nugent’ leaving the disenchanted youth to clean it all up.

  • Michael Heath

    IIRC, Bill O’Reilly proclaimed WWIII was happening after 9/11.

  • composer99

    Watching Glenn Beck get back to his Incredible Connect-the-Dots Act™ is leaving me misty-eyed.


    No, no, wait. That’s from Terry Pratchett’s death today.

  • Marcus Ranum

    Terry Pratchett’s death today

    Oh, no….

  • sugarfrosted

    As someone who actually uses blackboards to explain things, I am offended by Glenn Beck.

  • JustaTech

    I was going to be impressed by GB’s legible handwriting on that chalk board (it’s a lot harder than you think to write legibly on a chalk board), but then I saw it was pre-written, so then I had nothing to be impressed about, as usual.

    As for the wonderful Terry Pratchett … “ook” ( you will be missed).