C-SPAN Gets a Report from Planet Wingnuttia

A C-SPAN call in show recently took a call from a very…special caller from Georgia, who went on an extended rant about how President Obama, the EPA and the Sierra Club were hatching a secret plot to reduce the world’s population by creating lots more gay people.

“Last summer in Rio,” the caller from Georgia began, “the Sierra Club had a summit on sustainable population,” in which a member of the group allegedly said that “in order to reduce the population, we need to do these things — as many abortions as possible, promote homosexuality, and attack Christians that stand in the way of doing this.”

As the hosts looked on in stone-faced disbelief, the caller continued, saying “they want to reduce the population, and they planned to do this — the [Environmental Protection Agency] and the Sierra Club — they planned to make as many homosexuals as possible to reduce the population.”

“They are talking about bad things with these homosexuals, but when they talk to them, they act like they’re behind them and they’re all wonderful — but they have an agenda against them.”

According to the caller, the EPA and Sierra Club think “white people and black people, by abortions and turning people into homosexuals, will clear the way for them to have these Latinos come in and be the main population. Could you say anything about this?”

I can say something about it. I can say lots of things about it. “Put down the crack pipe” seems appropriate.

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  • John Pieret

    Could you say anything about this?

    Umm … how do you breathe with your head up there?

  • Chiroptera

    “Could you say anything about this?”

    I, uh, er, what?

    Seriously, I cannot “think on my feet” in public situations.

  • raven

    The UN-Illuminati-New World Order population reduction program is a staple of right wing nutjobs.

    Vaccines are an important part of it. Obama is a big part of it. Same with UN Agenda 21. In fact, everything iis a big part of it.

    Except reality of course. Right wing nutjobs don’t do reality.

  • raven

    One of our Mormon tech workers once told me that Them meaning The New World Order I guess, had plans to reduce the world’s population.

    I pointed out that most of Western Europe, Eastern Europe, Japan, and Russia already had negative population growth rates and falling populations. All without anyone doing anything much less herding people into death camps.

    His eyes went blank and his mind shut down. Then again, his mind shutting down was about his normal state.

  • Mr Ed

    You know when you think about it, it makes perfect sense.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    “Homosexualization.” said the shadowy figure as he crossed out ‘whites’ on the Big Board.

    “Abortion.” he continued, crossing off ‘blacks’.

    “And then?” asked the second shadow figure.

    “Then, the Endgame. For population reduction we elliminate the whites and the blacks,” the first replied, circling ‘hispanics’ on the Big Board, “then we import the papist Latinos.”.

    “Aren’t they against birth control?” asked the second.

    “Shit. I hadn’t thought of that.”

    “Oh. And aren’t we white?”

    “Yes. Wanna have some homosex?”

    “Obviously. Meeting adjourned!”

    [Credits roll]

    (In the shadowy shadows, a shadowy Asiatic figure laughs menacingly)

    [Cut to black]

  • caseloweraz

    Meanwhile, in the Land of the Rising Sun, Japan’s defense minister reassured the public on Wednesday that aliens have never entered the country’s airspace.

    He meant extraterrestrial aliens. Apparently this was in response to a question raised by a wrestler turned politician.

  • Sastra

    Oh, come on. I don’t know about the EPA, but I’m willing to bet that any world domination plan set up by the Sierra Club is bound to involve bears. Stands to reason.

    If there’s no mention of bears — and I don’t see it, correct me if I’m wrong — then we can be confident these reports are bullshit.

  • lldayo

    Could you say anything about this?

    Yeah, even Iran is laughing at your nutty ass.

  • busterggi

    I see Modus is a George Takai fan.

  • Larry

    Me thinks somebody had their tin-foil full body suit adjusted a wee bit too loose, allowing those Agenda 21 rays from the UN black helicopters to leak in and scramble what few brain cells they had.

  • Nentuaby

    Sastra: Believe me, if they’re promoting homosexualit anything like we do it here in San Francisco, there are going to be a LOT of bears involved, and a few otters too.

  • felidae

    This sounds like an opportunity for us heterosexual males to do our duty to repopulate the earth–we will have to do yeoman duty to service all those women left barren by the advance of the gays. It will be a demanding task, but we will rise to the occasion, heh,heh For more information, watch the ending of Dr Strangelove

  • Jared James

    Obviously most of us will be gay by then, too, felidae, but it should be somewhat comforting that we’ll each get our own twink, and possibly a cool bonus prize, like an electric motorcycle.

    Care for a locavore organic beet chip and a vacant-lot rye beer?

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    busterggi “I see Modus is a George Takai fan.”

    What was the giveaway? Was it the tattoo?

    More to he point, did I accidentally steal from him?* If so, I blame it on a teleporter accident.


    * Oh, my.

  • John Pieret

    And now for something completely different weird, Gordon Klingyshit is “predicting” that, within 100 years, 20% of Americans could be gay:


  • lorn

    Remember that there are literally millions of people who believe in at least some of those ridiculous assertions. They vote, contribute to political campaigns and parties who court them, and have a pretty good record of being politically effective. Wrong, but effective.

    It is liberals who are getting their butts kicked. We may be right, but we are also ineffective.

  • dingojack

    “… Could you say anything about this?”

    Neads moar Lizerdmen. D-.



  • dingojack

    Also how does it relate to — BEN GARZI!!?!?!


  • caseloweraz

    busterggi: I see Modus is a George Takai fan.

    He may well be, but I think what you meant is that he is a George Takei fan.

    The difference is important. It trips me up every time I pronounce the actor’s name: I say “ta-kay” when “tak-aye” is what’s wanted.

    It’s like when Dr. Pulaski first met the ST:TNG android:

    “Hello, Mr. Datta”.


    “Datta, Dayta — what’s the difference?”

    “One is my name. The other is not.”

  • abb3w

    Sounds like someone who read too much by LaRouche.

  • ehmm

    This is why the Washington Journal is the best show on the Tee Vee. Goddam I love C-SPAN.