‘Bible Man’ in Schools? Seriously?

A few weeks ago, the Freedom From Religion Foundation sent a letter to the superintendent of Grundy County schools in Altamont, Tennessee about the school allowing a guy who calls himself Bible Man to come into the school and proselytize students. Nothing that happened next will surprise you in the least.

Bible Man has been visiting Grundy County Schools for nearly 40 years without any problems, until recently. Last month, the Freedom From Religion Foundation wrote the school after hearing a local complaint.

The letter warns that Bible Man assemblies violate the constitution, and Bible Man is currently taking a break from visiting the schools.

“I believe the perception was that we’re trying to get rid of him, and that was not the perception we wanted to present,” said Dr. Willie Childers, interim Director of Schools.

“At the last board meeting, there were several concerned citizens wanting to make sure that Bible Man or Mr. Turner will continue to be in Grundy County,” said Childers, who hopes the school will adopt a “club schedule.”

That schedule would allow students to have the freedom to participate in a club of their choosing, which could include a religious-based club.

“We are trying to make sure that the procedures that we do are legal and constitutional for every citizen,” Childers said.

They let this guy lead a school assembly once a month, for crying out loud. It’s true that students can form Christian clubs and invite in speakers, but the Equal Access Act only applies to secondary school. Elementary children are likely not mature enough to organize and run a club. The EAA says that adults may not “direct, conduct, control, or regularly attend meetings,” and it’s highly doubtful that elementary school kids could create and run a club without that.

They obviously know they can’t continue the school assemblies, but it isn’t clear that they can do this through a club at the elementary level either. And of course, those who oppose allowing Bible Man in to the school are being threatened:

While the concerned mom says she’s glad it’s being addressed, she still worries about the lack of acceptance for those who don’t support Bible Man.

She points to threats made on Facebook against her child that include pictures of a burning house.

“We just can’t get over how much hate there is in their loving, Christian hearts,” she said.

As always, there’s a very simple test for all this: Would the people supporting this be okay if it was Quran Man instead of Bible Man? But here’s what I guarantee would happen. If it were Quran Man, that man would be threatened and run out of town on a rail and so would anyone who supported it. The school board would be recalled, administrators fired for allowing it. So when it’s Bible Man, anyone who opposes it is threatened. When it’s Quran Man, anyone who supports it is threatened. As always, when they say “religious freedom” what they really mean is Christian privilege — maintained through threats and violence if necessary.

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  • John Pieret

    “Christian religious freedom” = “Freedom to force Christianity on everyone else”

  • wreck

    Bible Man? What’s his superpower?

  • dugglebogey

    I’m trying to remember in which one of the gospels Jesus said “If they stop letting you force your religion on someone, that’s when you threaten to burn their house down!”

    Was that Luke or John maybe?

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    From what I understand, Triangle Man hated Bible Man. They had a fight. Triangle won. Take from that what you will.

  • Trebuchet

    Persecution, that’s what it is! They’re verbally killing him!! Eleventy!

  • LightningRose

    What a shame there are no Xian churches in Grundy county that could invite Babble Man to speak at Sunday school.

  • Larry

    In my school, they let a guy come and talk to us regularly who went by the name of Bat Man. He’d proselytize about the advantages of having a well-stocked utility belt. Didn’t do us no harm.

  • StevoR

    Half man half Bible?

    Fights crooks by um … citing bible verses and stopping bullets. Up to a few armour piercing rounds?

    Weaknesses iron chariots, solid evidence and the dreaded super-villan Literary Deconstruction Man?

  • StevoR

    Bible man! Bibleman!

    Doing whatever a bible can .. which is ..erm .. not much really?

    With notso greta power coems not-so great Christianity.

    Bible man inferior sequel of the far better superhero Torahman?

  • StevoR

    Dangnabbit! Tyops.

  • Michael Heath

    wreck states:

    Bible Man? What’s his superpower?

    I suspect it’s shamelessly lying to children.

  • Michael Heath

    dugglebogey writes:

    I’m trying to remember in which one of the gospels Jesus said “If they stop letting you force your religion on someone, that’s when you threaten to burn their house down!”

    Was that Luke or John maybe?

    I suspect this Christian terrorist is taking their cue from the Bible’s gods, Yahweh and Jesus; both promise to burn humans in a lake of fire for eternity. I think those are also relevant passages when it comes to this threat; that makes it one more illustration regarding the inherent evil of Christianity.

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    Is it Willie Aames? After Charles in Charge, he had a TV show where he played Bible-man. I’d go to the assemblies just to meet Buddy Lembeck!

  • samgardner

    C’mon, you guys don’t know the famous Bibleman, who apparently works by boring his opponents to death with Bible quotes?

    One of his enemies:

    Primordius Drool/The Wacky Protestor (Jef Scott) was a goofy, blue-skinned demon scientist who was formerly a green skinned demon with greater powers before he got demoted. His abilities include plasma balls and, as Primordius Drool, lightning. During his final scheme, he created a special portal to another realm to trap Christian students and turn them to Atheism. However, he got caught in his own trap and was stuck there forever. He was the first villain fought by the new Bibleman, Josh Carpenter.

  • blf

    Bible Man? What’s his superpower?

    Conveniently interpreting some heavily recopied and edited scrolls originating in the oral legends of stone age shepherds.

  • Lofty

    Bible Man? What’s his superpower?

    Stupendous leaps of faith from entirely made up multi stories.

  • Anders Kehlet

    @14 samgardner: Since you had to go and remind me of that I feel compelled to link to an episode on youtube.

    Here: Bibleman

    It’s exactly as horrible as you think it is.