Fox and Friends…Wow. Just Wow.

Fox and Friends is a painfully ridiculous “news” show with three of the dumbest hosts in the history of television, but this clip takes them to new heights of buffoonery. The two male hosts (Steve Doocy was not there, unfortunately, so he had a guest host) take a “manhood test” of changing a tire and fail miserably.

Kilmeade and Brown teamed up once again for changing a tire on a car that had been loaned by Enterprise Rent-A-Car.

Confusion immediately ensued as Brown began cranking the jack while Kilmeade sent lug nuts rolling across the pavement.

“This is what a man does, not just a male,” Van Orden noted.

“Whoa, watch it, Brian!” Brown exclaimed as the car began to roll forward, suggesting that the parking brake had not been engaged.

“Jack it up?” Kilmeade asked.

“No, it’s jacked,” Brown noted.

“Okay, so lug nuts are out,” co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck chimed in.

“Watch your feet, Elisabeth,” Brown warned. “The jack is falling.”

“The jack is falling?” Kilmeade said while attempted to push the car back onto the jack.

“The jack is falling,” Brown repeated.

“We’ve got teamwork going on right now,” Hasselbeck remarked.

“This is amazing,” Van Orden said, turning to the camera.

Meanwhile, Brown furiously cranked the jack counterclockwise to lower car. However, all but one of the lugs had been removed and the host concluded that he might damage the vehicle by lowering it further.

They finally bail on the whole thing and go back to the studio. Now let’s first say that this “manhood test” is just inane from the get go. The whole idea that one should turn to a Navy SEAL to teach you how to be a man is too stupid for words, especially with the dipshit Navy SEAL saying things like “being a man is not about what you are but about who you are.” *headdesk* But Jesus, these guys just humiliate themselves on national TV. It’s a joy to watch.

POPULAR AT PATHEOS Nonreligious
What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Mr Ed

    The lug nuts were so loose that they could be turned by the wrenches weight alone. I’m not sure if the producers were hoping they would take it for a spin first or if Real Men™ get some one else to do the hard work for them off camera.

  • http://www.clanfield.net janiceintoronto

    They should have just called a dyke. Presto, tire changed.

  • John Pieret

    The Three Stooges couldn’t have made a funnier or more ridiculous tire changing clip.

  • Alverant

    If they can’t change a tire correctly they’re a danger to themselves and everyone else on the road. Not wanting a tire to fall off is “manly” right?

  • wreck

    Next on Fox And Friends, how three manly men change a light bulb!

  • petemoulton

    This is causing me some serious rethinking. I’ve long been convinced that Steve Doocy is far and away the stupidest person on the teevee machine, but apparently he was smart enough to be elsewhere when these clowns set out to ‘prove’ their manliness.

  • http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Modusoperandi Modusoperandi

    Real Men get their interns to loosen the lugnuts but not chock the wheels/leave it in gear/set the parking brake. That’s just common sense.

  • http://www.holytape.etsy.com holytape

    I tired to change a tire once, but I made the car explode. I don’t know if I am not a male, or if I am the most manly man ever known.

  • caseloweraz

    Steve Doocy was not there, unfortunately…

    Maybe he’s not quite so dumb as we’ve supposed.

  • scienceavenger

    You know, I probably score the lowest of any adult anyone reading this knows on car knowledge*, and even I can change a friggin flat. It just goes to show how stupid, or isolated from real life, or both, that these guys are.

    =====

    *My fellow Texans often react in disbelief that the only way I can tell a Chevy from a Ford is to read the name on the hood.

  • D. C. Sessions

    I don’t dare show this to $HERSELF. First, because she might hurt herself laughing.

    But mostly because I feel more useful doing the tire changes despite the fact that a 60+ year old woman half my size is at least as good at it as I am. Which, apparently, means that she’s more”manly” than that whole crew. No need to prove it again.

  • http://www.thelosersleague.com theschwa

    Jeeze! Did they even put it in park? Is the engine still running? Do they know to pull off the road before stopping, or would they stop in the middle lane on the highway and one of them tries to change the tire while the other gives it gas?!

  • StevoR

    Is it me or are those two silhoutted men on the cover of that navy SEAL book holding hands?

    Not that you can necessarily read anything into that but still..

    Gathered that fixing cars these days requires a computer technician more than anything else, well okay changing tyres not so much.

  • StevoR

    And they admit that at least two women they know including someones daughter can do what they can’t!

  • neonsequitur

    Changing a tire is easy. I’ve found that doing so in an expensive suit without ruining the damned thing is a real pain. Not that I give these clowns any points for that — they can afford more suits!

    I used to have a job that required suit wearing and lots of driving, which resulted in the above scenario playing out much too often. And the pay was terrible; I couldn’t afford the suits or the tires. And by the way, the weather looks perfect in that clip….

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    The last time I watched Fox’n’Friends, it was shortly after Trayvon Martin was shot, and they were acting all indignorant about how there was another incident where a black guy shot a white guy and where was the media’s public outrage then and whites don’t get no respect blah blah blah… And that was AFTER the actual news item reported that the black shooter had been arrested and charges were imminent — which meant there was nowhere near as much REASON for outrage then as there was in the Trayvon Martin case. They were clearly nothing but a bunch of overpaid clueless brats, and I never bothered with them since then.

  • https://plus.google.com/107095827599382907783 NS Alito

    In the mid-70’s, in an all-girl Catholic high school, Sr. Sylvia taught our mini-mechanics class how to change tires. We would all troop out to the parking lot and each have to do it on various volunteered cars. While we each had to change a tire at least once, more often than not the task of replacing the jack components in the trunk (different and bizarre for each car) was my job, and I found that to be more challenging than the tire changing itself.

  • http://motherwell.livejournal.com/ Raging Bee

    They should have just called a dyke. Presto, tire changed.

    Yes, and it would have taken years of reparative therapy to change it back again. IS NO ONE THINKING OF THE (overgrown) CHILDREN HERE?!!!!

  • Abby Normal

    I’ve been caught by this same gender role before. To avoid any confusion I should mention I’m male. Years ago I was in a long-term open relationship with a wonderful woman. It never bothered me when she’d hook-up with someone. I never felt threatened or jealous or inadequate.

    Then one day we were riding in her car when we got a flat tire. She had no jack. So we called AAA and a nice man came to bail us out. As he started pumping the jack I felt a wave of shame and anger. I wanted to punch him right in his stupid, helpful face. This was my job. I’m the one who fixes things, especially her things.

    Funny where we invest our ego sometimes. Even now, as I read what I just wrote, I notice I was careful to mention it was her car that did not have a jack. I wanted to make no one would think I’d ever be so unprepared as to drive without a jack. I’m a work in progress.

  • http://artk.typepad.com ArtK

    Every time I read or hear “Fox and Friends” I can’t help thinking that it’s a kid’s show. Certainly an inane title for something that wants to be news for adults. I guess “The Wiggles” was already taken. Frankly, I think that they’d have to work hard to get up to the intelligence level of Barney.

  • Kermit Sansoo

    I don’t know why anyone would think tire changing is a good test for manliness, but it’s surely a test for isolation from real world consequences. These boys have clearly been protected from the real world all their lives. I can’t imagine any test for grit, however, which they could pass. Of course I can’t think of any test for grit which would be exclusively male, anyway. Even if you counted push-ups, most males would fail those and some females wouldn’t.

  • StevoR

    @ ^ Abby Normal : Same here. We probably all are.

  • http://onhandcomments.blogspot.com/ left0ver1under

    In libertaryanland, you don’t change tires yourself. Your income is large enough that you can hire “them” to do it for you. That’s why those clowns have no clue.

  • ebotebo

    These guys (and girl) could fuck up an anvil!

  • kimbeaux

    I rotated the tires on my dad’s Impala with a bumper jack when I was 15. That’s six tire changes. By these guys logic, that means a 15 year old girl is six times manlier than either of these buffoons, right?

  • vereverum

    Re #5

    Next on Fox And Friends, how three manly men change a light bulb!

    .

    One to assure us that if it wasn’t for gay marriage the old one would still be working and two to screw it into a water faucet.

  • Abby Normal

    Next on Fox And Friends, how three manly men change a light bulb!

    They’ll just rant about how the lightbulb was good enough for their parents and changing it will doom America to becoming a Marxist caliphate led by the demoic spirit of Hitler.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=153100784 Michael Brew

    Ah, yes, tire changing. The truest test of manliness despite the fact that most women can easily perform the same task and large swathes of men cannot. Obviously it’s just more of a Guy Thing™.

  • dingojack

    Alice Elizabeth Foley Anderson (1897-1926). Clearly not a women, then.

    @@ Dingo

  • dingojack

    Alice Huyler Ramsey, another FAUX ‘news’ non-woman, at work. @@

    [see here.]

    Dingo

  • sigurd jorsalfar

    Not wanting a tire to fall off is “manly” right?

    Pfffft, no. It means you are a total pussy, everyone knows that.