Charles Koch Leaves My Flabber Completely Gasted

KochBrothersEvery once in a while I will read something that someone said and it will leave me so gobsmacked that I spent the next few minutes just staring at the screen in disbelief while a bit of drool emerges and slides down my chin. Charles Koch of the infamous Koch Brothers managed to do just that in an interview with the CBS Sunday morning talk show. This is simply a staggering bit of self-delusion:

MASON: But do you think it’s healthy for the system that so much money is coming out of a relatively small group of people?

KOCH: Listen, if I didn’t think it was healthy or fair I wouldn’t do it, because what we’re after is to fight against special interests.

MASON: Some people would look at you and say you’re a special interest.

KOCH: Well, yeah but my interest is just as its been in business, is what will help people improve their lives? And to get rid of these special interests, that’s the whole thing that drives me.

Oh yes, of course. Like when they spend hundreds of millions of dollars on lobbyists and political bribes to kill regulation that makes their refineries, paper plants and other facilities spew less pollution into the air and water, that has nothing to do with them wanting to maximize their profits, it’s only because they’re so gosh darned concerned about helping people improve their lives! When they spend vast sums of money to convince people that global warming is a lie, actions that will lead to massive damage, millions of refugees, resource wars and much more, they do it out of the benevolence of their pure and selfless hearts.

My flabber is truly gasted.

About Ed Brayton

After spending several years touring the country as a stand up comedian, Ed Brayton tired of explaining his jokes to small groups of dazed illiterates and turned to writing as the most common outlet for the voices in his head. He has appeared on the Rachel Maddow Show and the Thom Hartmann Show, and is almost certain that he is the only person ever to make fun of Chuck Norris on C-SPAN.