Joyner: God Will Side With Trump Over Comey

Professional con man Rick Joyner says that Donald Trump will win the battle against fired FBI Director James Comey because God is on his side. And God is on Putin’s side, too, which is why that damn liberal media hates Putin so much. Or something.

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Joyner said that the media is intent on destroying Trump and is obsessed with the Russia story because Vladimir Putin “hates the LGBT, he hates that whole gay agenda and will not tolerate it in Russia.”

No, that’s why you love Putin. That isn’t why the media hates him. He and you both hate gay people and want them oppressed by the state. And you’re both decidedly on the wrong side.

But Joyner predicted that, in the end, Trump will win in this battle because he has the “favor of God on him.”

“He’s a fighter, he was made for that,” Joyner said. “Wait and see if he doesn’t prevail. I tell you, he’s got favor from God on him, he’s got a calling. Every other time before in these unbelievable battles, whenever everybody thought he was done, he’ll never get up from this one, he keeps getting up and he keeps winning every time. He’s going to ultimately prevail in all of this.”

That’s a perfectly testable prediction, or should I say prophecy? And if you’re wrong, we get to stone you to death. God says so.

About Ed Brayton

After spending several years touring the country as a stand up comedian, Ed Brayton tired of explaining his jokes to small groups of dazed illiterates and turned to writing as the most common outlet for the voices in his head. He has appeared on the Rachel Maddow Show and the Thom Hartmann Show, and is almost certain that he is the only person ever to make fun of Chuck Norris on C-SPAN.