I Sold My Soul For a Cookie

Posted on September 29, 2009 by Guest Contributor

If you’re on campus at Texas Tech on Wednesday (a.k.a. International Blasphemy Day), you’re in for a treat if you stop by the table of the Secular Student Society near the library.

All you have to do is sign over your soul and they’ll give you a cookie!

Here’s an amusing thought: A Christian student passes by the table, starving because he didn’t have time to eat lunch… What does he do?! Oh, the dilemma…

(Thanks to Drew for the link!)

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  • http://baroncognito.livejournal.com/ BenYitzhak

    I couldn’t possibly sell something I didn’t possess.

  • Delphine

    If I were the Christian in your scenario I’d sign over my soul.

    It’s a cookie. And it’s free.

    Besides, if God is all powerful you’d think he would be able to do something as simple as getting my soul back.

  • http://religiouscomics.net Jeff

    God is so easily tricked into giving up souls. The devil’s job is VERY easy.

    Of course, if one could hold onto the souls and sell them to the devil for two cookies each, then one could make a lot of cookies ;)

    Silly

    (and people sell stuff they don’t have all the time). Its called the free market. What ever the market will bear.

  • CaptainBeefheart

    I do nothing and walk to the nearest coffee shop or store to buy something bigger and better.

    Duh.

  • http://ilikeportello.blogspot.com/ Matt

    I already sold my soul for untold riches and all the women I can handle.
    Tha devil said the paperwork’s going to take a while, so while I’m waiting can I have a cookie?

  • Pustulio

    I knew a guy in high school who sold his soul for a taco one day at lunch because he forgot his wallet. After college he went to work for Microsoft. Coincidence?

  • http://lunchboxsw.wordpress.com Aaron

    Jacob and Esau from the book of Genesis comes to mind…

  • http://baroncognito.livejournal.com/ BenYitzhak

    But if I sign a check saying that I’ll give 500 dollars to someone for a cookie, I’m still responsible to give them 500 dollars even if I don’t have it.

  • http://chaoskeptic.blogspot.com Iason Ouabache

    I just want to know if they will be handing out receipts to show whose souls that they have bought. You have to have a paper trail on things like this.

  • http://littlelioness.net Fiona

    If they are yummy Subway coookies, then maybe

  • Revyloution

    Hell, I’d sell my soul for a piece of Bazooka chewing gum. And I even hate gum.

    Which reminds me of the all time best movie quote

    “I came here to kick ass and chew bubblegum. And I’m all out of bubblegum”

  • http://religiouscomics.net Jeff

    Jacob and Esau from the book of Genesis comes to mind…

    Hmmm… Lets see. The secular student society is “Jacob” and “Esau” is the person that stops by the booth. “Esau” is hungry and sells off a future “blessing” for an immediate gain (the cookie). Does this mean that “Esau” will later come back and demand his soul back and threaten to kill “Jacob”? I guess “Jacob” would need to go in the witness protection program for about 20 years until such time as “Esau” forgives him. Perhaps the conflict could simply be avoided by giving “Esau” a receipt to reclaim his “soul” if he joins the secular student society… That would be the reasonable thing to do. :)

  • CAL

    Revyloution Says:“I came here to kick ass and chew bubblegum. And I’m all out of bubblegum”

    I thought it was “I came here for two things, kick some ass and drink some beer, and we’re almost out of beer”

    Different movies I guess=)

  • Erp

    It would also mean the secular student society “Jacob” would wrestle with God and get renamed “Israel”.

  • http://st-eutychus.com Nathan

    Does the Secular Society promise not to sell the souls to the campus Christian group?

    You’d have to hope so – wouldn’t you. Wouldn’t want that soul of yours falling into the wrong hands…

    And in answer to your question – I’m a Christian and it would depend on what sort of cookies they’re offering as to whether I took up the offer.

    I don’t think that sort of deal is legally or spiritually binding.

  • http://www.myspace.com/khassem Alexi

    forbidden cookie ..*drools*

  • TXatheist

    imo, Texas Tech is one of the most conservative public schools in Texas…it’s a damn dry county and the 2 guys I know that went there said it’s surrounded by fundies. Glad to hear of the group in Lubbock. Trivia knowledge for all. Lubbock ISD has been preaching abstinence for years. They have 3 times the rate of teen pregnancy/std compared to the rest of Texas. That info is a few years old.

  • lubbockchick

    Txatheist…Lubbock actually went wet last week! Lbk and Texas Tech are both quite conservative, but with interesting pockets of freethinking liberals/independent types.

    Lbk does still teach abstinence in the schools and still has the high std rates, but not 3x the rest of the state. :)

  • http://jessicasideways.com Jessica Sideways

    I know that I do not have a soul but if I were down at Texas Tech, I definitely would sign it over for a cookie. ^_^

  • Hector Brenes

    What a great idea and it doesn’t give me a heartburn. I’ve sold my soul numerous times and I’m still broke! Luckily, I can keep on selling it for whatever I can get.

  • http://web.utk.edu/~bvanderf Hazor

    My new goal in life is to own ten souls. I’m going to do this some time at my school, the University of Tennessee at Knoxville.

    Now, if only I could find another rationalist on this campus to join me.