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When I saw this, I was surprised:
Mark Driscoll has thoughts?!
Hemant Mehta is the editor of Friendly Atheist, appears on the Atheist Voice channel on YouTube, and co-hosts the uniquely-named Friendly Atheist Podcast. You can read much more about him here.
That guy is such an asshole. I was watching this one video of his where he’s describing the ideal marriage, and he explains modern marriages guided by feminism. Basically since the husband and wife are equal, they have separate jobs, separate interests and they divide all responsibilities perfectly equally. He claims that it’s a new trend in building houses to build two master bedrooms because they don’t like to sleep together. It’s obvious he does everything he can to scare women away from seeking equality.
Caught a segment on Catholic radio the other day about how churches are becoming to womanized and don’t respect or value men like they used to. Apparently, there’s a whole let’s-focus-on-men movement going on:
I don’t think he cares much if women seek equality, unless ‘unmanly’ men go along with the idea.
Everytime I see this guy or his stuff (books, promotions, ect….) I want to vomit. Seriously, Driscoll? He’s so incredibly fanatical, I can only shake my head. Why people actually listen to this guy, I’ll never know.
The mind of Mark Driscoll? See below;
He should really get out of his bubble and see how well these egalitarian marriages do in the real world.
He’s very charismatic. I feel the same magnetism for Glenn Beck if I zone out a little and stop thinking critically about what he’s saying.
He claims that it’s a new trend in building houses to build two master bedrooms because they don’t like to sleep together.
“A new trend” dating back to (at least) a model home I visited in the mid 1980s? Well, that is *really* new if you prefer the standards of the 1850s, I suppose. But … wasn’t it a thing back in the Victorian era for couples (who could afford it, obviously) to have separate bedrooms? And doesn’t it go MUCH further back than that for the really rich and powerful (kings and queens, etc.) to have separate apartments within a palace?
Not to mention that aside from whether it’s “new” or not, it’s probably helped save a few marriages. When one person snores really really loud, and the other can’t sleep through it – if you can’t afford the extra bedroom, you have to deal one way or another. But if you can afford the other bedroom, why not? Likewise if the two work different shifts, or have really different sleep schedules, etc.
If you have a good marriage, separate bedrooms won’t kill it, and may help keep it. If you have a horrible marriage, the separate bedrooms may be a symptom, but they’re not a cause.
I was expecting an x-ray image of Cygnus X-1.
Another reason to have a second master bedroom is to have a grandparent live with the family. It also makes a great guest room. Our first house had two masters, and we loved it.
Mark Driscoll has thoughts?
A few. He has other thoughts besides “woman = whore.” Here are some others: all men other than Mark = inadequate wimps, Mark wannabes. Mark = Ultrastud! Megamacho! He-Man is a girl in comparison! my congregation = money producing units. Jesus of Nazareth = a suspiciously leftist wimp who needs to listen to me to man-up.
Yeah, I found it funny that he thought it was new. Also, I can see how it would help in some marriages. I just thought it was crazy that he seemed to think that people in egalitarian marriages don’t actually love each other. Like they just say hi to each other every now and then, but their lives are completely separate.
The Acts 29 Network (which Driscoll is part of) specifically says on their web site that the sexes are not equal. I think they’re actually offended at the idea that women should be considered equal to men. So it’s not surprising if a church is “too womanized” if they don’t cater to the grunty wants of the men all the time. I’m being serious there, especially given how Driscoll almost worships physical toughness and has even brought an octagon ring into his church.
Driscoll is an insufferable obnoxious prick. He’s the heir apparent to Falwell, Swaggart etc. He took out the southern hillbilly element and substituted it with this bullshit tough guy persona. I hope he gets caught with a tranny hooker.
So I went over to the Mars Hill website today and made myself read the full transcript of the first sermon of Driscoll’s Esther series, which is what inspired the above comic (I still can’t make myself listen to the man’s voice). Here are some of the highlights:
“Esther is one of only two books of the Bible that has its name after a woman. For you ladies, God bestows particular dignity, value, and worth for you in the pages of Scripture, but particularly in the book of Esther.”
Two whole books of the Bible? That’s, like, 3%! I feel more valuable and honoured already!
“You heard of Xerxes? You shouldn’t watch it, but if you have seen Frank Miller’s film, _300_—a bunch of guys who did P90X and a bunch of gals who don’t wear enough clothes, that’s why I can’t recommend it.”
I have a sneaking suspicion that Driscoll’s obsession with strong male bodies is not entirely to do with a desire to be a rugged manly-man. (Note: I haven’t seen 300, but from what I’ve heard, it was brimming with homoerotic subtext.)
“How many of you guys play Assassin’s Creed? Okay, if you raised your hand, you’re new to Mars Hill and you don’t know that we make fun of men like you. So if you’re one of those guys who’s really good at video games, you know, tell your mom “Hi” in the basement where you live, but what you will note is one of the characters in Assassin’s Creed is Xerxes.”
Because all the *real* men are out cage fighting and f***ing their wives, amirite? What a condescending a**hole.
“He assumed the throne at about the age of thirty-two, so now he’s, let’s say, thirty-five or thirty-six. This means when Esther enters the scene in a few weeks, she’s fifteen to twenty years younger than he is.”
Bullcrap. Driscoll may like to imagine Esther was 16-21, but if she was beautiful and still an unmarried virgin at that time, in all likelihood, she was closer to 13 or 14 at most.
“Women were widely mistreated. In addition, they had an enormous harem, and so the palace would include an entire section just to house all of the women who were there to please the king, whatever his nefarious desires might be. As corrupted as your mind can conceive is the reality of life in that day. These men make Hugh Hefner look Little League in comparison to the kind of lavish lifestyle, opulence, and abuse of women that they enjoyed.”
Yes, let’s dwell on that for a moment, shall we? Driscoll loves to bring this stuff up. Anything that will titillate his young audience and hold their attention.
“In that day, men conceived children; they didn’t raise children. So, you wouldn’t even meet your dad until your fifth birthday. You were raised by your mom. In this case, you were raised in the women’s quarters in the palace. You were raised with the other wives in the harem. So, he grew up a very spoiled boy.”
Maybe he’s just commenting on absentee fathers here, but it sounds to me like Driscoll is saying a boy raised by women can come to no good.
“In that day, they would have also called this ‘the world.’ Okay? Okay? That’s the world. Okay? There weren’t a ton of people, yet, in Mexico or Detroit. Right? Or wearing kilts in Scotland. Right? That hadn’t happened yet. At this point, the majority of people on the earth lived in this region, and he ruled all of it.”
Yeah, nobody lived in all those other places … except for the people who lived there. I guess if it didn’t happen in the “Holy Land”, it just couldn’t have been all that important.
“In addition, we are told, and I am not saying this in a way that is inappropriate, but he is supposed to be a handsome guy. Okay? I don’t know what a handsome guy is, but the record says that he was tall, dark, and handsome. I’m not sure that’s handsome. I tend to think that short and wide is handsome, but the historical record says that he was very handsome, like, a very good-looking guy. Okay?”
Translation: “Because I am totally un-gay, I have no idea what makes a man physically attractive. Really. None at all. I mean, it’s a complete mystery to me what features a female person would find aesthetically pleasing on a male face or body. Because I’m totally and in all ways 100% straight. In fact, I can’t even see men. When I look at them, I just see a blank space. That’s how not-homosexual I am. I am not in any way thinking about the movie 300 again right now.”
“And again, I’m not recommending it, but they [the Immortals] also make an appearance in the film, 300. They’re the guys with the masks.”
Oh, wait. He totally was thinking of the movie again, wasn’t he?
“If we gave you an unlimited amount of power and wealth, what would you do? Some of you are like, ‘I would feed the poor.’ You would throw a party. You would throw a party. You would throw a party and you would invite lots of important people so they could all take their photo with you, and you could put it on Facebook and Twitter.”
Hey, look! Driscoll assumes everyone is a selfish a**hole deep down. I wonder why he would think that? Couldn’t be because he’s a selfish a**hole. No, I wouldn’t throw a massive, self-indulgent party full of famous people if I suddenly had access to a ton of money. I’d do my damnedest to make the world a better place, because I’m not a shallow, self-absorbed dickhead.
“In addition, do the math with me. Start to think about it. Six-month party for fifteen thousand people. How many of you have recently just had a dinner party where you cooked for some people, and then you went to bed for a month you were so tired? Right? Like, Thanksgiving, Christmas, exhausted. Six months. Six months!”
With all the lascivious talk of harems and abuse of women and girls, guess what Driscoll doesn’t mention even in passing? Slavery. Because obviously all of Xerxes cooks and event organisers are paid a fair wage with a benefits package and 401k, and they get evenings, weekends, and holidays off. It’s just those poor, poor women and girls in the harem who are abused. Driscoll focuses his congregation’s attention on nubile concubines and the dirty, dirty things that were done to them, rather than mentioning the uncomfortable topic of slavery more generally. I wonder if it’s even crossed his mind?
“When no women are present and no rules are in place, men become animals. Amen? What they’re doing is despicable, deplorable, disgusting, and depraved, and there are women there, but these are women who are getting used and abused.”
That’s right; men are just animals. They can’t help themselves. It’s up to the ladies to civilise them (not those whores from the harem). No pressure, though, girls.
“He was totally consumed with the harem and all the women who just met all of his evil, sick, sinful, selfish, abusive desires.”
Oh, are we back to this again? The congregation are all going to need cold showers when this is all over. Driscoll definitely is.
By the end of the sermon, Driscoll has mentioned women and girls being abused seven separate times, and Xerxes’ harem seven separate times. Count ‘em:
“Women were widely mistreated. […] he mistreated and abused women […] Is he going to look after young girls who could be abused in a very difficult day? […] Just a drunk old man, ruling, reigning, abusing girls […] to ravage and abuse women […] Women are being abused […] Xerxes used his power to abuse women.”
“they had an enormous harem, […] you had many wives and a huge harem […] You were raised with the other wives in the harem. […] you hand to them the most beautiful harem […] Food, drink, flowers, place settings, entertainment, bands, harem, girls, teenagers. […] The employed women who are part of the harem […] In addition, he had numerous other wives and he had a harem.”
Is this the only way he can fathom talking about power, wealth, and excess? Is he really hyper-focused on this stuff, or does he think he needs to be to maintain his audience’s attention? This guy baffles and infuriates me. I feel like I need a strong drink before I think about tackling sermon #2.
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