Conservative Christian or Fundamentalist Muslim?

Slate has the quiz and it features quotations like this one:

“It’s like having a flower, or a rose. You water it and keep it at home for yourself, to look at it and smell it. It is not supposed to be taken out of the house to be smelled.”

Who said it?

100 Internet points to anyone who gets a perfect score!

(Thanks to Rike for the link)

About Hemant Mehta

Hemant Mehta is the editor of Friendly Atheist, appears on the Atheist Voice channel on YouTube, and co-hosts the uniquely-named Friendly Atheist Podcast. You can read much more about him here.

  • Matt Eggler

    I saw this the other day, I got one wrong. What helped me do so well was noticing a key difference between the way fundamentalist Christians and fundamentalist Muslims view women. Fundamentalist Christians tend to just be patronizing and controlling, fundamentalist  Muslims are afraid of women. 

  • Graham Hill

    Woot, 9 out of 10!

  • Neil Rickert

    7 out of 9.

    The attitude toward women is the same, but there are some cultural distinctions in how they express that attitude.

  • Graham Hill

    So I can distinguish between conservative Christians and fundamentalist Muslims, yet I cannot count. I got 8 out of 9.

  • Achron Timeless

    7 out of 9. I would’ve done one better, but the one talking about a woman reading or doing homework (instead of masturbating I’d later find out) threw me because of the general anti-education stance islam has for women.

  • tkmlac

    8 out of 9! I was fooled by this quote: “[A girl] can read a useful book, prepare her homework, join a charity, and spend her time doing things that are useful to her in this world and the world to come, instead of thinking about satisfying her urges.”

    I was thrown off by the idea of a Muslim fundamentalist allowing a girl to read and do homework…

  • Amakudari

    Spoilers, so take the quiz first.

    7 of 9, but more because of word choice and what people can get away with in a culture.
    I can’t think as easily of a Westerner claiming women will get divorced in the first week of marriage or that a women is like a house plant. “Problems” with “radical feminists,” on the other hand, are very Western in nature. And the way of talking about power and nature’s endowment also struck me as Western. Definitely thrown off by the al-Qaradhawi quote, though. (Yes, there’s an Australian Sunni in here as well, but the semantics of Western vs. Islamic isn’t that important here.)

    The point, however, is that it’s how they say it rather than what they say. There’s unfortunately not much context for these quotes, which might make things more obvious, but it’s still amusing.

  • Kterb

    You scored 9 out of 9. 


  • Kevin_Of_Bangor

    6 out of 9 for me…

  • Michaelbrice

    8 of 9, got tripped up on same one as you, pretty much for the same reason. I guess reading a book is a lesser sin than masturbation – or something like that – or maybe by ‘useful book’ he means the koran

  • rlrose328

    Eh, I got 6/9 but hit the wrong button on one of them.  All it did was depress me… you can add fun to crazy but that doesn’t make it crazy fun.

  • shannonkish

    100%. Not very hard, actually

  • ImRike

     “The point, however, is that it’s how they say it rather than what they say”
    Yes, how they say it helps to identify the Christian from the Muslim. But what I find interesting is that WHAT they say is so similar that it’s hard to tell them apart. So here we have these Christians that are constantly agitating against Islam and Sharia Law being so similar to what they say they disagree with!

  • Heidi

    7 of 9. I like that score, actually. Next stop: The Federation

  • Jason Horton

    They’re almost indistinguishable to me. Are they having a competition on who can be the most ridiculous and vile? If they are I don’t see anyone winning.

  • Thumper1990

    I got LOADS wrong. But that hardly suprises me, since I have always maintained that despite their self-professed animosity, Fundementalist Christians and Fundementalist Muslims are just two sides of the same hate-filled coin.

  • jpml

    9 out of 9.
    And now I feel terrible.

  • Aljaž Kozina

    Me too!

  • Lagerbaer

    7 out of 9. The content could come from both of them, but sometimes little cue words give it away. A Fundamentalist Muslim wouldn’t talk about “Radical Feminism”, for example.

  • CanadianNihilist


  • Ibis3

    9 out of 9. The main difference is that the Islamists are more prone to cast women as highly sexualised temptresses who must be kept in their place to preserve the purity of men. The Christians used to do the same, but they’ve changed their focus slightly (e.g. they often stress the necessity for girls to show modesty, but don’t generally speak of them as if they were nymphomaniac sex demons–temptations for boys and men, yes; seductresses, not so much–though that line of thinking comes out of the cupboard the instant someone’s being accused of rape) .

  • DrExceptional

    Me too, I can’t complain about having Jeri Ryan’s character for a score.

  • Raising_Rlyeh

    7 out of 9
    I assumed “Bring up your daughters with manners, otherwise they’re going to be divorced in the first week of their marriage.” was a christian fundamentalist.

    I also got “It’s like having a flower, or a rose. You water it and keep it at home for yourself, to look at it and smell it. It is not supposed to be taken out of the house to be smelled.” wrong

  • Seth Peterson

    OH yeah perfect score! Internet points for me!

  • Brian Tarr

    it was the “urges” part that tipped me off, i guess…well, plus the idea of something being actually “useful” in the afterlife; christians seem to think it all arrives on a silver platter for merely being credulous(and what “it” actually is is almost never concretely discussed among christians), but muslims have a more practical(albeit nevertheless barbarous’n’backwards) view of the hereafter.

    also, ironically enough, i just remembered what first caught my eye when i saw this’n(it was a few weeks ago): the fact that, indeed, he is talking about things which at first glance might be considered progressive, but upon closer inspection leave more than enough open to interpretation to figure he might’ve meant a useful book like the qur’an(or maybe just some hadiths for some light reading :P); her homework on her qur’an studies, or maybe just some home economics classes; an islamic charity which fights tirelessly against the menacing global threat of danish cartoonists and pours its resources into restoring the caliphate and establishing sharia law, and finally, all the juicy, greasygoodness you can imagine would be subsumed under “useful things” :D