The only way to solve the United States’ twin problems of homelessness and an embarrassingly low percentage (under 98%) of civilians with military-grade assault weapons is for charities to step up to the plate. Charities need to give America’s homeless assault weapons. Did you know owning an AR-15 is the gateway drug to American freedom and responsibility? It most certainly is. Back in the days of the Founding Fathers a man needed to own property to vote. And how… Read more

  There’s been a recent spike of news stories concerning white Americans calling the police on black Americans. Cases where the police were called unnecessarily include but aren’t limited to barbequeing while black, sleeping while black, and entrepreneuring while black. As the country moves towards the 2018 midterm elections the GOP issued a list clarifying when calling the police on blacks is justified. The following is an excerpt from the 321 single-spaced document: Anytime a black American uses the word… Read more

From Pliny the in Between! I was watching the video of Matt Dillahunty chatting with Jordan Peterson. If you don’t know who Jordan Peterson is, then congratulations. You’ve been able to insulate yourself in pop culture resistant insulation. Doctor Peterson waged a war against communist pronouns in Canada and has a rabid following of young dudes who need a father figure. Peterson said was that our entire ground of being is in danger. In short, you kill off the mythic… Read more

  Proud Baptist Richard “Fighting Dick” Henderson spent most of last night staring at his computer screen wondering if Yanny sounds less gay than Laurel. Coworkers asked him which word he heard when listening to the four second recording that went viral. Afraid of being considered a ‘soy boy’ by his buddies, Mr. Fighting Dick feigned ignorance. However, he was anything but ignorant. He was one of the first people to listen to the clip on Reddit. Truth be told… Read more

    Here is comedian Nathan Timmel’s weekly What Would Jesus Do Wednesday rant!    Tony Perkins. No, no… don’t formalize that. We’re not talking Anthony Perkins here, the Psycho who dressed up like his mom and stabbed women in the shower. That would be nuts. We’re talking about Tony Perkins, head of The Family Research Council. Which is not to be confused with Focus on the Family, The Christian Family Movement, The Fellowship (also known as “The Family), or… Read more

This comic is aptly titled Authority and is from Pliny the in Between! I should apologize to all of you because I haven’t been cranking out jokes at President Trump’s expense lately. There are only so many hours in a day and coupled with so many targets for humor it’s difficult to keep up. Today I’m making up for it. Enjoy these three comedic crunchy nuggets. Read more

  Washington DC – Leaked FBI documents reveal a secret plan President Trump has for destroying the Constitution of the United States of America. Codenamed ‘Goldfinger’ President Trump planned to destroy the original Constitution as well as the 14 early copies. Once completed, President Trump would rule over the country as Lord Protector and without any legal restraint. Project Goldfinger Revealed The documents show how a local aerial show, Pussy Galore’s Flying Circus, were to strafe the National Archives with… Read more

  Let me tell you guys a story about my mom, Rebecca Gansburg Sankey. When I was young, for a few years me and my brothers went to school in a one room Christian schoolhouse type situation inside our church. At most there were like 23 kids in the entire school any given year, one year there might have been like 12. It was tiny. Everyone knew each other super well. Lots of gossip. My family was always weird to… Read more

Many people know what Dungeons and Dragons is. The Dungeons and Dragons site explains the game as “players are characters in an ongoing fantasy story”  and “The core of D&D is storytelling. You and your friends tell a story together, guiding your heroes through quests for treasure, battles with deadly foes…” Your character must have a moral alignment. There are two axis: Lawful/Chaotic and Good/Evil. For example, you could be playing a wizard who is lawful-good. That character wouldn’t lie and… Read more

  InfoWars founder Alex Jones recently ranted  Iceland is fake news. Jones asserted no nation could be as liberal, happy, and prosperous as “egghead experts in the pockets of gl0balists” say it is. Iceland being a “libtard myth” is just the newest conspiracy theory by the man who helped spread lies including but not limited to Pizzagate, the government of the United States orchestrating the Oklahoma City bombing and 9/11 attacks, and that he is, in fact, a salmon swimming… Read more

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