Montreal, Canada – Canadians are waking up to their country accepting more and more refugees from Donald Trump’s America. These refugees come from all walks of life. Even though their needs may be very different, Canadians are determined not to act like their neighbors to the south.
“What we’re not doing is freaking out,” stated Prime Minister Andrew Canard. “Have you seen this country? It’s huge. We have enough maple syrup for everyone.”
This calm and collected attitude is shared by many Canadians. In fact, there is a realization among those over the age of 30 that the United States goes through apoplectic fits of political schizophrenia every once in a while.
“I remember Bush W. That guy got America into one big mess after another,” mused Montreal native Nathan Smith. “Tax refunds the country couldn’t afford and then that whole Iraq debacle, and then the financial crisis. Americans are basically nice people with political bipolar disorder.”
With more and more asylum seekers coming into Canada from the United States there is a consensus that the government needs to create a system to assist them. In a bold move, the Canadian Parliament voted to allow the Native Peoples to elect commissioners to head such efforts.
“Native People have a good understanding on how not to do immigration,” stated Prime Minister Canard.
The system of screening and housing refugees isn’t complete. However, a pencil and paper test is being debated to see how an asylum seeker from the United States may fare in Canada. Such questions include:
- _____ lives matter. If the answer is “Blue” then the refugee may need extra time to integrate into a Canadian society not as riddled with institutional racism as America.
- Make America _________________. What many Canadians are concerned about are Americans trying to infiltrate their country in order to make Canada a banana republic like the US. If the answer is “great again” then the individual may need to spend time in a 7th-grade civics class.
This Poe is based on the very real BBC article Canada opens Montreal Olympic Stadium for migrants from US. There is a very real spike of people from the US heading into Canada. Most of the time its refugees who came to US who are heading into Canada seeking help.
Andrew Hall is the author of Laughing in Disbelief. Besides writing a blog, co-hosting the Naked Diner, he wrote two books, Vampires, Lovers, and Other Strangers and God’s Diary: January 2017 . Andrew is reading through the Bible and making videos about his journey on YouTube. He is a talented stand-up comedian. You can find him on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.
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