Sometimes I Really Hate Advertising

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A friend of mine just sent me an email she got from Ebates.[Text: Boy's Shoes. Keep Them Active. Make sure your boys is comfortable for all of his activities, indoors and out.][Text: Girl's Shoes. Show Them Off. From the school yard to the birthday party, find the perfect pair for activities and comfort.]I am doing my best to raise my children in an egalitarian way, but I often feel like I am swimming upstream. I mean, really? Really? Boys shoes: "Keep Them Active." Girl's sh … [Read more...]

The Patriarchal Utility of the Threat of Rape

India Gang Rape Protests

I would hazard a guess that many people think rape is wholly about individual men forcing individual women to have sex with them. Many people object when the phrase "rape culture" is used because, they argue, everyone knows rape is wrong. There is an inability, I think, to look at rape on a national level, or even a global level, because for many people rape is simply local and individual, a random criminal act like theft or vandalism. But to view rape in this way misses the bigger picture. You … [Read more...]

“I Make More Money Than He Does”

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Over the holidays, I made the mistake of bringing up laundry at the dinner table at Sean's parents' house. Sean may not have grown up in the evangelical homeschool world of Christian Patriarchy that I did, but his mother doesn't work outside of the home and his parents have always embraced fairly traditional gender roles, so I really should have known better. Anyway, I simply wanted to know if Sean had started the load of laundry he had said he would, and to let him know that he would have to … [Read more...]

Why My Son Bobby Needs Feminism Too

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I've noticed something as the mother of two children, one daughter and one son. I can dress my preschool daughter in girls' clothes or in boys' clothes, but if I dressed my baby in purple or put him in a dress, well, I'd get some serious stares.We often say that "patriarchy hurts men too." It's true. For example, I grew up in a community where boys were expected to grow up to be providers and girls were expected to grow up to be homemakers. Girls didn't have any options, but boys' options … [Read more...]

New Year’s Resolutions Anyone?

2013

Happy New Year everyone!So ... I know, I know, the whole New Year's Resolution thing is cliche and can lead to feeling guilty later when you don't follow through on your good intentions, but I like the idea of sitting down and thinking about the closing of one year and the opening of another and what you can do differently and better in the new year.For this next year, I have not so much a resolution as a word: "balance." I have so many balls in the air right now that finding a good … [Read more...]

Awesome Comment Award: Tsara on “Girl Clothes”

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Reader tsara left the following comment on a post about the modesty doctrine and rape culture: …seriously, guys actually think that women dress for them? What sort of thought processes do they imagine go into picking out clothing? For me it’s mostly‘is this clean?’‘does it more or less match’‘will my mother say it makes me look like an old woman with too many cats’‘would I get looked at funny for walking around the mall like this’‘is it comfortable enough to wear all day’ … [Read more...]

My Top Ten Posts of 2012

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I've put up literally hundreds of posts over the past year, so I thought I'd take a moment to look back at the ten posts that got the most traffic. Unfortunately, something got reset when I moved my blog to Patheos this past March, so this list is actually the top ten posts of the last ten months. I'll add a moment of commentary after each.1o. So you say you don’t hate gay people, Part IVThis post was the one where I introduced the sexual ethics graph I later highlighted in my post A Ta … [Read more...]


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