“Legitimate Rape” and the Good Men Project

slut shaming

By now you have probably heard about the Good Men Project's recent putting its foot in its mouth on the topic of rape. If you haven't, Grace has a good summary with a list of posts written on the subject. What it comes down to is this: The Good Men Project has started discussing the role partying, alcohol, and drugs play in rape, which is good. However, instead of focusing solely on the necessity of consent they are spending time talking about how "nice guys" can get confused by alcohol and … [Read more...]

Tragedies Should Be Calls to Action

tragedy

I'm hearing it again. Eighteen elementary children met pointless deaths today, and yet my facebook feed has lit up with cries that gun control doesn't solve anything and assertions that the problem is spiritual darkness, not things like guns or mental illness. Eighteen families have lost their children, and yet the cries of denial are loud already.I am a mother. I have children, one of whom is fast approaching elementary school age. I cannot imagine the grief those families in Connecticut … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: In Which Mike Spills the Garbage

spilled garbage

Created To Be His Help Meet, pp. 40-42Debi's goal in this passage is to show how thanksgiving produces joy. She starts with a story called "My Jolly Playmate." This story is sort of divided into three parts: the first part continues Debi's pattern of urging women to just be happy rather than actually dealing with things that irritate or bother them; the second part involves a heavy dose of gender essentialism; and the third part takes a bizarre turn as Debi makes light of the idea of marital … [Read more...]

How Sex Offenders Return to the Pulpit

pastor

I grew up in a large evangelical megachurch. I only ever heard of one sex scandal, and that involved a junior pastor having an affair with a secretary. The junior pastor left both his family and the church, the secretary stayed with her husband (I am not sure whether she kept her job at the church), and that was the end of that. So for a long time, I have been unable to understand stories like this one, reported as follows by blogger Incongruous Circumspection: Many of my readers may be familiar … [Read more...]

The Results of Homeschool Mis-Socialization

scared

As I was thinking about homeschooling and socialization recently, I realized something in my experiences that at first seemed contradictory. You see, when I first started college I found frightening something as simple as walking through crowded hallways or sidewalks between class. However, I had never found walking through the crowded foyer in my parents' megachurch frightening in the least, even though most of those individuals were also strangers (that's generally how it is in a megachurch - … [Read more...]

How To Do Rape Awareness Right

rape

**Trigger warning for survivors of rape and sexual abuse.**Reader Petticoat Philosopher just sent me a rape awareness ad aimed at teenagers. It's an excellent example of what rape awareness campaigns should focus on, rather than on things like how women dress.Petticoat Philosopher shared her thoughts as follows: There isn't anything about this that isn't perfect. Why can't we have campaigns like this!? I love it because, for one thing, it's targeted about people who might rape not … [Read more...]

Christian Patriarchy and Gender: Contentment v. Ambition

stars

For as long as I can remember, I heard the values of contentment extolled. Contentment, contentment, contentment, contentment, contentment. Growing up in a family influenced by the Quiverfull and Christian Patriarchy movements, contentment was something preached on a daily basis. I learned very early that I must be content.But you know what? This isn't what the guys around me were being told. While I was being taught to be content, they were being taught to be ambitious. They had to find jobs … [Read more...]


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