Courtship, Part 3: They Said He Would Leave Me

The whole reason I was sold on the idea of participating in a parent-guided courtship in the first place was my fear that if I chose my own husband I would be blinded by love or manipulated by an unscrupulous young man and thus end up in a hellish marriage. Following a parent-guided courtship was the safe thing to do. My father would protect me by vetting my suitors and choosing a good husband for me when I could not… Read more

Worthwhile Reads: Religious Homophobia

Sierra just finished a series on Christian fundamentalist homophobia: It Really Is about Fear Generalized Anxiety and Images of Depravity The Argument Is in the Eyebrows Finding Unconditional Love outside the Church See also: Hate the Sin, Love the Sinner? by Melissa “Hate the Sin, Love the Sinner,” by Katy-Anne Read more

Courtship, Part 2: What’s Important and What Isn’t

I explained in Part 1 why the idea of a parent-guided courtship was appealing to me. In that post I described the courtship process that I grew up expecting. Here I am going to focus on one aspect of that: the process by which the father vets his daughter’s prospective suitors. This is, after all, how the father is supposed to protect his daughter from a disastrous match by helping her choose a husband. My father made a list, a… Read more

Raised Quiverfull: Do You Wish You Could Go Back?

Do you sometimes wish to go “back”? Joe: Coming soon. Latebloomer: The further from the movement I am, the happier I become.  I have never had a desire to return or any feelings of nostalgia about it. Libby Anne: Not recently, no. For a while there though I did sometimes wonder if it wouldn’t simply be easier to step back into good-obedient-daughter-mode. I knew how to wear that hat, and I knew I could put it back on and everything… Read more

Worthwhile Reads: Feminism + Housewifery

Wow. When Jill posted her article, Feminism + Housewifery, on Feminste, she knew it would be provocative and controversial. She even ended her post with “Bombs thrown. Discuss away.” Basically, Jill takes on the idea that it’s just fine for women to choose to stay at home with their children and be housewives, and in the process she brings up a whole array of thought-provoking issues. Remember when I said that I like to think of feminism as a discussion rather than… Read more

Worthwhile Reads: On New Expriences, Gender, and Religion

Melissa on Fear of School Melissa on Five Things I Like about Being a Mom Who Works Part Time Sierra on Christian Patriarchy and Complementarianism: “Separate But Equal” Puts on Lipstick Sierra on Fast Cars and Misogyny: How Girls are Prevented from Learning “Masculine” Skills The Slactivist on The Big Four: The Package Deal of Christianity Sarah over the Moon on We teach boys to abuse women. We teach girls that abuse = attraction Read more

Courtship, Part 1: Eroding Girls’ Self Confidence

When I was in high school, I looked forward to the day when I would take part in a parent-guided courtship. It’s what I wanted. The idea that I could go out myself and find my own spouse was incomprehensible to me. In fact, I even said that I would be open to an arranged marriage. More than that, there was even a point where I wanted an arranged marriage. Why, you ask? Let me explain. The idea that adult… Read more

Raised Quiverfull: Looking Back on Your Childhood

How did you perceive your childhood at the time compared to how do you see it now? Joe: Coming soon. Latebloomer: At the time, I felt like a lot of things about myself were sinful—my sexuality, my negative feelings of frustration/anger, my opinions, and even my poor social skills.  I genuinely wanted to have a deep relationship with God that would let me be satisfied no matter what my circumstances were.  I believed that my challenges were God’s way of… Read more

Worthwhile Reads: A Week of Mutuality

Rachel Held Evans recently conducted a Week of Mutuality on her blog, with posts comparing egalitarianism and complementarianism and critiquing the latter. Here were some of the highlights: Week of Mutuality: How it will work, definition of terms Let’s start at the beginning, shall we? (Genesis 1-3) 4 Common Misconceptions About Egalitarianism Submission in Context: Christ and the Greco-Roman Household Codes Who’s Who Among Biblical Women Leaders For the Sake of the Gospel, Let Women Speak (1 Timothy 2:11-15) Is… Read more

Raised Evangelical: A Call for Questions

Now that the Raised Quiverfull project is coming to a close, I have decided to start another project. While Raised Quiverfull covers young adults raised in families influenced by the Christian Patriarchy and Quiverfull movements, this new project will cover young adults raised in evangelical or fundamentalist families. Before I make my call for question suggestions, I want to make a quick distinction. While evangelicals and fundamentalists usually endorse some form of patriarchal gender roles, that does not automatically make them part of… Read more