(Too) Great Expectations

Quiverfull teaches that Christian parents should have large numbers of children in order to raise up and army for Christ and take back America for His Glory. My parents always told me that they were filling their quiver with arrows in order to shoot them out into the world and retake this country and this culture for Christ. They said the reason they weren’t out being missionaries, pastors, or politicians making godly laws was that they were instead investing their… Read more

The Problem With Homeschooling

This has been a hard post to write, because it is a touchy subject. But I’ve written it anyway because I feel passionate about this issue, so please hang in there and hear me out! Without homeschooling, Christian Patriarchy as we know it could not exist. Why? First, because Christian Patriarchy cannot exist without parents having the ability to isolate their children, especially their daughters, from the outside world, and second, because Christian patriarchy cannot exist without parents having the… Read more

Cultural Disconnection

My parents thought they were doing me a favor when they chose to homeschool me and intentionally shelter me from the outside world, but what they didn’t realize is that their decision would leave me culturally disconnected from my peers. I asked someone who Brittney Spears was some years back, and was rewarded with the most incredulous look I have ever seen. Some years later, I astounded someone else by literally not knowing the name of my state’s prized football… Read more

Diminished Dreams

Many of those in the Christian Patriarchy movement believe that girls should not go to college. Thankfully, my parents did not believe this. My parents both had college degrees, and they believed that a good education was extremely important. Therefore, my homeschool program was rigorous and quite adequate, and I left for college on an academic scholarship. It sounds like I escaped the detrimental effects Christian Patriarchy can have on girls’ educations, doesn’t it? Don’t kid yourself. Every daughter of… Read more

Casting the Pearls back to the Swine

It is a strange reality that Michael and Debi Pearls’ child training methods were driven into me so firmly as a child that I didn’t even think to question them when I left Christian Patriarchy behind. I still believed that children must be trained to obey their parents unquestioningly, that children should be spanked starting as young as six or nine months, and that if parents did not break their children’s wills those children would grow up to be miserable,… Read more

Sons of Patriarchy

Yes yes, I know I just said it’s about the daughters, but it’s actually about the sons too, and here’s why: Christian Patriarchy may say its about creating the perfect godly family, but, at its heart, it’s about control. Yes, that sounds kind of harsh! Let me explain. In Christian Patriarchy, parents don’t let their children grow up and leave and make their own decisions. Instead, parents seek to control their adult children. The system only works if everyone stays… Read more

It’s about the Daughters

When it comes to the multitude of problems with Christian Patriarchy, it is the position of the daughters that I am most passionate about. The patriarch has it pretty good – he’s the one who gets to call the shots. The sons usually don’t have it so bad either – they’re patriarchs in training. The mothers may spend their lives having baby after baby and they may believe that they’re to submit to the patriarch in everything, but they generally… Read more

The Beautiful Girlhood Doll, p. 7: Submission and Obedience

The Godly Woman recognizes that “the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man…” She willingly and joyfully submits to him in everything as she would unto Christ. What other women view as a burden and degradation, she views as an honor and a blessing. My parents believed in male headship and the umbrella of authority. They believed that the husband is the head of the wife and that the wife must submit… Read more

The Beautiful Girlhood Doll, part 6: Joy and Friendship

The woman of God is joyful and seeks companionship with those who share the same vision. For the daughter who has embraced the beauty of Christian girlhood, the richest friendships begin within her family, where she learns to love and honor, and first learns the joy of belonging to another. I had a lot of friends growing up, and they definitely all shared my vision. In fact, they were all exactly like me! All of my friends were white, middle… Read more

The Beautiful Girlhood Doll, part 5: Home and Hospitality

One of the defining qualities of beautiful girlhood is a love for home and hospitality. A young girl watches her mother and looks forward to the day when she, too, will have a family. While other girls are driven by wanderlust, the hospitable girl finds true contentment at home. I loved being at home, and I never wanted to be anywhere else. My home was my father’s castle, and I loved it. While some of my siblings sometimes chaffed at… Read more

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