Gothard’s Sex Rules: Marital Consent? What’s That?

Young woman is in the fair about her future

My family never attended one of Bill Gothard's seminars, and we didn't use Gothard's curriculum. We children were, instead, raised on the outskirts of Gothardism. We knew people who were followers of Bill Gothard, and we imbibed a few of his teachings (umbrella of authority, anyone?), but that was the extent of it. As things began to snowball over the past months and Gothard was exposed as a sexual predator and ultimately relieved of his leadership position, I wanted to learn more about what … [Read more...]

Love Is a Broken Heart?


If you don't want Frozen spoilers, don't read this post, because I can't write it without spoilers. But then, if you don't want Frozen spoilers that means you still haven't seen the movie . . . so seriously, just go watch it and then come back and read the post.Prince Hans is the justification for the entire courtship ideal taught in the conservative Christian homeschooling subculture. It goes like this: There are men out there ready to prey on women, and women are so easily befuddled by … [Read more...]

Christian Patriarchy on Educating Daughters


Okay, let's take a few minutes to hash out Christian Patriarchy's view towards women and education. I think this is necessary because I hear one side saying "you don't believe in educating girls" and the other side saying "no no no, we do educate our daughters, your accusations are ridiculous." So what is really going on here? I can't necessarily get at what the ordinary family on the ground is doing, but what I can get at is what the leaders of the movement say. So let's take a look, shall … [Read more...]

Purity. It’s for Girls.


Growing up, my brothers got purity rings too. They, too, were expected to stay pure until marriage. I have often taken comfort in the seeming egalitarian application of purity teachings in my own upbringing. Or so I've told myself.But I'm getting frustrated. Because let's face it, the emphasis is on the girls.A Swedish photographer attended some purity balls in the United States and took the above picture and others. Within evangelical purity culture, both boys and girls are expected … [Read more...]

CTNAHM: Michael Compliments Himself—by Complimenting Debi

Debi Pearl

By AlethaOriginally posted on Yllom MormonCreated To Need A Help Meet, pp. 165---167After what I'm calling the Great Internet Blackout '14 (turns out backhoes and cables don't'd think the phone/internet/tv people would have realized this prior to digging), I'm back with another review. Because I've been away for awhile, I'm treating all of you lucky readers to an extra-long section! Don't you feel blessed to be able to read more of Michael's inspiring words? WrinkleA … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Men Are Powder Kegs (so Don’t Provoke Them)

Anger 2

Created To Be His Help Meet, pp. 237---238Today we learn that Debi thinks all men are explosive powder kegs who lash out in sudden anger at a moment's notice. I'm not surprised by this, but I sure am sad. How to Minister to a MAD HusbandIt is common for men to react with sudden anger when things do not go their way. They can get mad over a lawnmower, a faulty appliance, or a child talking too much. It is unregulated testosterone seeking a conflict. It is not usually conflict-induced, … [Read more...]

AnotherOne: Stop Invoking the Taliban!


Reader AnotherOne recently left the following comment: Dude, I know I'm beating a dead horse here, but for the love of god, can we stop with the "Talibamerica" crap? The fundamentalism of the Taliban is a tiny piece of an overall picture of what the Cold War did to an impoverished country of non-literate, tribal people. The Soviet invasion and occupation and American arming of the mujahideen resulted in the death of around a million Afghans (in other words, about 1 in 30 people) and the … [Read more...]