But that wasn’t the end of my conversation with my daughter yesterday. I also told her that her great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother was a Quaker. I had to explain what that was too, of course, but once I did her eyes lit up. “Cool!” she said. We need to bring our children face to face with reality, but we also need to inspire them to be the ones willing to keep going when others stop. Read more

In the time I’ve spent around survivor communities, one thing I’ve noticed is an alternating feeling of euphoria and despair. It is not uncommon for a person to feel they can take on the world one day and to feel like all they want to do is curl up and hide the next day. I’ve watched this happen in various online communities as someone freshly liberated from an abusive home environment will post one day about how incredibly happy she is, as though she is floating, and the next day she’ll post in tears, struggling with PTSD, fear, and self-doubt and asking if it ever gets better. Read more

It’s time for another chatter thread! Read more

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It’s been a while since we’ve gotten a peak into Donna’s personal life. We’ve only met Donna’s boyfriend, Stephen, twice so far: once when we first met Donna waking up in bed with him back in chapter 1, and once when she told him about this particular case while eating lunch after the initial hearing. We know that he’s from a rich family and has daddy issues, and that he just graduated at the top in his class from Gonzaga University School of Law. We also know that he’s studying for the bar exam and will be going to Washington, D.C., to take a job that is a “chance of a lifetime” for the next two years as soon as he’s finished with the bar. Read more

Earlier this week, Hemant Mehta published an article titled We Can’t Ignore the Cultural and Religious Roots of the Cologne Sexual Assaults. While I largely agree with his post’s content, I want to add something to his analysis. Hemant begins his post as follows: On New Years Eve, in the city of Cologne, Germany, what was supposed to be a night of celebration turned disturbing very quickly. We’ve learned that hundreds of women may have been sexually assaulted or had their property stolen that night… Read more

I was raised in an evangelical home. I embraced my parents’ and church’s beliefs wholeheartedly. I was the sort of evangelical teen who hung out in the church library looking for new apologetics books to read. I was dedicated, and passionate, and wholehearted in my beliefs. As a young adult, these beliefs crumbled and fell through my fingers and I looked around, bewildered. How could I have been so very wrong, I wondered? That experience taught me something important—that I could be completely sure I was correct about something and yet be completely wrong. Read more

Last summer Ladies Against Feminism posted an article titled “Speak for Yourself: Why Single Feminists Should Not Speak for Married Mothers.” I’ve been ruminating over this article ever since and it’s still bothering me. For one thing, I’m finding it highly ironic that the author of this piece, Marian Shah, is herself not a mother, while I, the feminist in the room, am a mother. For another thing, the author doesn’t seem aware of third wave feminism. And finally, the author’s words do not reflect my experience or the experience of the vast majority of the mothers I know, even as she seems to think she is speaking for mothers. Read more

Having read through the lawsuit in full, I want to take a moment to mention ten things even I found surprising. Many of the allegations included in the lawsuit have been common knowledge since being posted in 2013 and 2014 by Recovering Grace, a website run by graduates of IBLP programs critical of Gothard and his teachings. However, the lawsuit also includes information I had not seen before. I want to focus on these points because of the questions they raise about why Gothard’s abuse was not recognized and addressed earlier. Read more

It’s time for another chatter thread! Read more

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