Masturbation: A Selfish, Addictive, Vicious Cycle

The biggest argument in both videos seems to be that masturbation is selfish. Indeed, this is very much the argument Josh Harris made in his 2005 book, Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is). In that book, he argued that masturbation within marriage is wrong because sexual pleasure within marriage should always be mutual. As someone who is married and masturbates, I have to disagree. Sometimes it is masturbation that is unselfish. Read more

Maintaining a Relationship with Difficult Parents

I’m not sure I’m the best person to give advice on dealing with controlling, manipulative, abusive parents. If this is your situation, what you do will be determined by your desires and the details of your specific situation. I’ve learned some tricks—for example, responding to attempts to begin a conversation you don’t want to have with “I disagree, mom, I disagree” and then refusing to say more can be very effective—but that’s about it. The biggest advice I can give you is to set boundaries with your parents. And if they can’t respect those boundaries? Well, what you do then is up to you. How much are you willing to put up with to keep them in your life? Read more

Are Creationists Withholding Information from Children?

In the end, arguing that creationists are withholding information from children to keep them from understanding reality isn’t going to get you very far, in large part because creationists are arguing in favor of presenting children with more information (i.e. information about creationism alongside information about evolution), but also because creationists believe they are teaching children about reality (i.e. they truly believe the earth was created in six days six thousand years ago). We need to find other (and more effective) ways to combat misinformation and promote good science. Read more

Michael Farris Doesn’t Read the Bible (Apparently)

As a young woman with a good Christian upbringing rich in Bible reading and memorization, Farris’s comment leaves me confused. More than that, it leaves me wondering if Farris reads the Bible he claims to adhere to so closely. Surely I am not the only product of a devout evangelical upbringing to note the close resemblance between Price’s situation and a certain parable told by Jesus in the Bible. Read more

Lesbian Duplex 27: An Open Thread

It’s time for another lesbian duplex thread! Read more

Part of Parenting Is Letting Go (School Edition)

School approaches, and in my Facebook feed I’ve seen many posts by moms sending their children off to kindergarten for the first time. They’re worried. They’re scared. They talk about crying over their impending separation, and about wondering if maybe they should keep their children home a few more years—homeschooling is better known, now, especially among the more progressive hippie types who grace my friend list. Read more

Anonymous Tip: In Which Dr. McGuire Cackles

If Farris wanted to present this story that could happen “to anyone,” he would have been better off leaving out the bribery and over-the-top corruption. He could have made this book much more powerful by focusing on the ways good intentions held by good people can go wrong. Or he could have had the psychologist object to Gwen’s spanking and parenting patterns, but without the bribery. But a cackling psychologist who takes bribes? That feels much more like the subject of a book than the subject of real life. Read more

Evangelical Author Shaunti Feldhahn’s Misleading Work on Marriage and Divorce

The issue is not that divorce rates were never close to 50% but rather that they’ve come down, thanks to feminism (or rather, thanks to changing patterns and approaches to marriage). But you’re not going to see that in Feldhahn’s book. There is a lot of really good really interesting sociological research out there on marriage and divorce, but the Christian press’s misleading portrayal of Feldhahn’s book as authoritative because it’s written by a Harvard-trained expert will make evangelicals only less likely read any of that. Read more

When Positive Parenting Doesn’t “Work”

If all you’re after is obedience, corporal punishment is probably your best bet. But if your goal centers more on acting with compassion, kindness, and understanding, and on teaching those traits to your children, obedience becomes less important. Don’t get me wrong, this can make parenting frustrating—sometimes very frustrating. I really wanted that nap the other weekend. But when it comes down to it, I would rather treat my child with kindness and miss a much-desired nap than use force to bend my child to my will and get that sleep. Read more

No, the African American Womb Is Not More Dangerous Today than during Slavery

This entire conversation ignores the fact that it is absurd to compare abortion and child fatality, because aborted fetuses (remember that the vast majority of abortions occur during the first trimester) never have a conscious thought and thus don’t know what is lost, and women who have abortions do not typically suffer the heartrending horror of losing a child. Any attempt to compare abortion today to the absolute horror of antebellum slavery is absurd to the extreme. The only reason I took the time to lay out the numbers in this post is that I wanted to show that Wilson loses even on the terrain he has set up. Read more

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