I Just Wanted Someone to Take Care of Me

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I remember feeling very sorry for my brothers as a child. They would have to grow up to work a job and support a family. They would have to be the one in front with the baseball bat if there was a home intrusion. They would have to make the big, scary decisions. Not me. I would be taken care of. I would stay at home and read books to my children, plant an herb garden and sew new dresses, read my Bible in the early morning and obey my husband. Unlike them, you see, I was a girl.I liked the … [Read more...]

Is the Christian Homeschool World Really Changing?

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Things are changing in the Christian homeschooling world. Vision Forum has fallen and ATI is shaken. People are talking, really talking, and the narratives are shifting.Some are still resisting this conversation. They claim that Doug Phillips' fall had nothing to do with his patriarchal ideology. With both Phillips and Gothard, they argue, the problem was with the leader, not the belief system. These claims are dispiriting, because in some sense these leaders are interchangeable. Old ones … [Read more...]

Upworthy, Duke, and Ableist Slurs

Gay and Stupid

I recently came upon an Upworthy article that asked the following question: Which one of these is not like the others: 1. That's so dumb. 2. That's so stupid. 3. That's so annoying. 4. That's so gay.To me the answer was obvious: The first two are ableist slurs and the last one is a homophobic slur. Only the third one does not personal characteristics like sexual orientation or physical or mental normatively as derogatory slurs. Given this introduction, I assumed the article as going to … [Read more...]

TTUAC: Bad Attitudes Are a Disease


To Train Up A Child, chapter 13, part 3Today we finish the chapter on "attitude training." WHY IS EVERYBODY ALWAYS PICKING ON ME?While I teach a Bible class, my two daughters help baby-sit a house full of children under five (five children under five is a house full). One of the mothers returned to find her three-year-old daughter whining of being mistreated by a little fellow under two. They all confirmed that the stumbling toddler had in fact provoked a class-A-altercation without … [Read more...]

Lourdes Torres, Christian Homeschooling, and Consent


I recently came upon an excellent example of what I was talking about when I wrote my "The Tale of Two Boxes" post several years ago. Homeschool leader Chris Jeub had this to say in a recent blog post titled "Patriarchy Has Got To Go": In a nutshell, Phillips is being sued by his former nanny, someone he knew for over a decade and was very close to the Phillips family. Her lawyers have graphic details of Phillips forcing himself sexually, and Phillips’ lawyers are denying little of it, claiming … [Read more...]

CTNAHM: Sexual Sins as Far as the Eye Can See


By AlethaOriginally posted on Yllom MormonCreated To Need A Help Meet, pp. 159---161Last post we talked about the basics of a wife's spots, wrinkles and blemishes. The next few sections will be delving deeper into each of these. Today we're talking about spots. More specifically, the spots that one's wife has picked up because of sexual impurities. I hope you're ready for a big bucket of bananas, because that's what's being served up today!I apologize if this post is a bit long. I … [Read more...]

When Every Touch Is Sexualized

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Bill Gothard has now admitted that he held hands with teenage girls in his employ, touched their feet, and caressed their hair, but he claims that none of that was sexual. I grew up in the same cohort and culture as these girls. As such, I think I need to share a bit more of my own story, because it sheds light on the significance of physical touch within purity culture. I haven't shared these things because they're quite personal and a bit embarrassing, but duty calls, so here goes.I … [Read more...]