Quoting Quiverfull: It’s Not Child Abuse Unless I Say So?

by Lori Alexander from Always Learning - Attack on Traditional Child TrainingEditor's note: Just because you were spanked does not make it right. Lori uses in the full piece the fact that she, her husband and Mr. Pearl were spanked as justification for continuing to hit in the face of overwhelming research that proves it's the exact opposite of what they claim. It does harm. It is abuse. It is banned many places for legitimate reasons. Which makes me thankful she's no longer in the classroom and possibly wielding a wooden paddle. Hitting a child is never right, most people discipline their children by having consequences for behavior that aren't abusive, not yelling. … [Read more...]

Answering ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ – Piercings?

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical,  rational and the best possible solution, in other words 1 … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Praise All Men?

by Lori Alexander from Always Learning - Let's Bash Men and Put Them in Their Place!Editor's note: The graphic that Ms. Alexander used in this piece just gives me pause because it's so highly triggering, a fist coming right at the camera. Very inappropriate even for the subject of 'male bashing'. The other problem is that she's not really addressed the issue of how the original author she's complaining about didn't actually male bash so much as apologize for his specific sins against women and for the general sins of misogyny in Christianity. Yes Lori does hate women. She makes that clear in all her writings. That is the real disgusting thing here. … [Read more...]

Elie Wiesel Would Have Been Disappointed in You

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsI haven’t posted in awhile.  But the death of Elie Wiesel brought to mind this quote the spirit of which has always been at the forefront of my thoughts on my experience with spiritual abuse.“We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.” – Elie Wiesel … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Your Boyfriend is Supposed to Lead You to Christ?

by Raegan Thornhill from Delighted in Him - Wait for the Man Who Preaches You the GospelEditor's note: The purity and courtship crowd come up with some of the most confining rules for friendships and relationships. We see how well this works out when you look at the large number of unmarried daughters like the Botkin girls and look at the fact that Christians have higher divorce rates than non-believers. Why not base your relationship on mutual interests, love and attraction and not worry so much about if you are being lead to Christ? … [Read more...]

The Costs of Quiverfull Part 1 – Open Letter to Quiverfull Readers

by Suzanne TitkemeyerOne of the realizations I've come to over NLQ recently is that there are a lot of women still in the Quiverfull movement that come visit and read at this site. I admit I haven't exactly been nice or welcoming to them, generally running them off the comments the minute they say something nasty. I'll continue to moderate the comments and enforce the safe space there for those in recovery, but at the same time I cannot help but feel we need to somehow be more open to those still choosing to be part of the movement. What we can do is continue to point out the poisonous nature of that theology. This is the first part of a series of posts aimed at showing the reality of … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Part 3 – How to be a ‘Bad’ Church Member?

by Steven Anderson of Faithful Word Baptist Church - 3 Ways to be a Bad Church MemberEditor's note: Several people have noted in the comments of the previous pieces that this all might be a reaction to push-back within Anderson's own church, a way of controlling what he is perceiving as 'bad behavior'. Yes, that's very likely, especially after reading this last piece. Fits with an article I saw this morning called Veiled Threats in Sermons at Spiritual Abuse.org. Anderson did link to his sermon on being friendly so I'm guessing there has to be disunity in the ranks of his followers and possible warring factions. He's written about church unity lately as well. Something is starting to … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Part 7 – Questioning the Pearls

by Michael Pearl from No Greater Joy magazine – But I Wanted to Ask Mr. PearlEditor's note: Last bit from this article. Making a child have real legitimate real-world consequences for bad behaviors is a good thing. But standing there looking smug next to some cracked-out home made sign proclaiming that the child cannot win against the adult is just unnecessary and cruel. Why do you think Michael always as to add a needling needless cruel twist to even decent ways to handle children? It speaks of a sick mind from here. Who likes purposely hurting children? You cannot 'rule with dignity' if you are standing there sniggering or being smug. … [Read more...]

Do Fundamentalist Christians Indoctrinate Their Children?

by Bruce Gerencser cross posted from his blog The Life and Times of Bruce GerencserThanks to Arkenaten for prompting me to write this post.When using the word “indoctrinate” in connection with the manner in which Fundamentalist Christian parents raise their children, objectors say that I am using a word that should only be used when describing cult child training methods. According to the defenders of all things Evangelical, it is Fundamentalist religious cults that indoctrinate children, not God-fearing, Bible-believing, Evangelical Christians. … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Part 6 – Questioning the Pearls

by Michael Pearl from No Greater Joy magazine – But I Wanted to Ask Mr. PearlEditor's note: Oh my word! She's upset that she didn't learn to spank her child early on? I wonder if she's ever considered the 'Love and Logic' series instead of 'To Train Up A Child'? Can Michael give child training advice that does not lead to beating a child with a rod of correction? … [Read more...]