Before You Meet Prince Charming: Part 1 Chapter 5

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideAll quoted text from Sarah Mally's book 'Before You Meet Prince Charming' in blue text.At the end of Chapter Four's allegory, Sir Eloquence disappears from the story.  I find that disappointing for a few reasons. … [Read More...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Jesus Should Be Your Only Tattoo?

by Doug Wilson from Blog and Mablog - No Baptismal ScarEditor's note: Doug Wilson says that the shame of abuse drives women get to tattoos, piercings and participate in cutting themselves. According to Doug because Jesus was pierced and cut on the cross you should not do any of those three things because you just need to 'come to Jesus'. So much of this series Doug wrote on the aftermath of sexual abuse is just disgusting and wrong! … [Read More...]

Questioning the Pearls – No Matter How Much I Beat Her She Cries!

For well over a year we’ve been running a second Answering ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ on Sundays, filled with questions by young ladies trying to get ready for marriage. Since we’ve run through many of the questions on their site it’s time to shift Sundays to something else, like perhaps examining the cornucopia of probably fake emails and questions that Michael and Debi Pearl of No Greater Joy post on their website and the possibly poisonous answers they give. … [Read More...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Be Grateful For Dirty Socks on The Floor You Selfish Woman?

by Lori Alexander from The Transformed Wife - Leaving His Socks on the FloorEditor's note: So it's now more important to have a husband than it is to have some self-respect or to have your own needs met? While being thankful in all things isn't bad necessarily, being thankful to the point of having no needs is pretty sick. Since I know that Lori never allows even the slightest push back in comments on her blogs or on her Facebook page that she insists on calling a 'Chat Room' (totally different thing btw) just sound off in our comment what you would say to Lori about this idea that you should be grateful to have a husband in the first place. … [Read More...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Be the Woman Behind the Man?

by Debi Pearl from No Greater Joy - New Book! The Hidden Help MeetEditor's note: Aha! Now we have an idea of what Debi's new 'Help Meet' book is about. It's about being the little woman standing behind the great man doing the grunt work, unthanked, unpaid, and unacknowledged. If that's your desire in life, great, go for it. But, don't make a rule for everyone out of this idea. This is just a rehash of all the ways that Ms. Pearl herself has accepted her role in her husband's life with a grimace she wants everyone to mistake for a joyful smile. The Denny she's speaking of here is Denny Kenaston - a speaker and author out of Pennsylvania. … [Read More...]

How to Encourage Your Husband: Part 2 – Verbalize

This is a series looking at the marriage advice given in Nancy Campbell’s book ‘How to Encourage Your Husband’.While packing for a move I have turned up are books, terrible idiotic books filled with toxic advice. One of those books is by Nancy Campbell of Above Rubies ‘How to Encourage Your Husband’. I think I ended up with this book in the aftermath of leaving my old church, given to me by one of my former friends that thought it would ‘help’ my marriage since in her eyes my husband leaving our old church meant that I wasn’t doing my job of wife well enough. Reading through this book now I cannot help but laugh at some of the suggestions. The book is entirely written by commenters and co … [Read More...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Modern Women Are Rebellious?

by Lori Alexander from The Transformed Wife - She is Loud and StubbornEditor's note: Lori is citing yet again from her 1828 Webster's Dictionary to make determinations if women are living up to the standards she has gleaned from her Bible reading. Loud and stubborn aren't always bad characteristics to have. Loud and stubborn women got us the right to vote here in the United States. Loud and stubborn got Civil Rights for all races in this country. Loud and stubborn got this country unions, the 8 hour work day and labor laws that dictate that children must be in school instead of work as ages as young as six. Loud and stubborn is what ended the the US involvement in the Vietnam War. The … [Read More...]

Using Halos to Cope With Horns? Objectification as a Double-Edged Sword

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much GraceAll images by Cindy Kunsman and Under Much Grace used with permission.Just a reminder that the purpose of this discussion aims at stimulating thought and self awareness as tools to help those in recovery from trauma learn how to make safer choices. To make the discussion more jocular, we've defined Cognitive Biases as “CranioRectal Inversions” (CRI).Here's a radical thought as we continue to consider the trappings of the Halo Effect. (I've dubbed the other side of the idealization coin as the Horn Effect to describe cognitive bias that results in the demoralization of others.)People don't like to think that thinking v … [Read More...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Properly Seducing Your Husband?

by Larry Solomon from Biblical Gender Roles - Why God Wants You To Seduce Your HusbandEditor's note: Please have a barf bag or bucket handy when reading Larry comparing sex to drinking water. The Biblical formula for sex is a woman makes herself affectionate “as the loving hind” and beautiful as the “pleasant roe” and available“at all times” and she ties her affection, her beauty and availability together to make herself sexually intoxicating to her husband.  In other words – in the Biblical model of marriage a woman seduces or sexually entices her husband to come to his well and drink of the waters of her body and by doing this she intoxicates him, or ravishes him with her sexual love. … [Read More...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Raped? Don’t Stay Angry at Your Rapist Overnight?

by Doug Wilson of Blog and Mablog - The Manna of AngerEditor's note: A little good does not leaven or dismiss the toxic in Wilson's continuing advice to this supposedly fictional abused young girl. Be angry, acknowledge your anger but don't keep being angry is no answer! While volunteering and helping others can help you in recovery the most critical helpful bit that Wilson and others miss is ongoing counseling from a licensed mental health professional. … [Read More...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Your House MUST Stay Full?

by Nancy Campbell from Above Rubies - A Full HouseEditor's note: Wow, so it's not enough that you stay home, keep your house spotless, perfectly decorated and raise the kids. Now you must pack your house with others and keep them fed and entertained in the name of Jesus. That bar just keeps getting higher and higher, doesn't is? … [Read More...]

Answering ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ – Immunizations?

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 18 … [Read More...]