I stumbled on this the other day while doing some research. I love it when I find absurd stuff like this — it’s fascinating what some people can actually believe.
On a message board, Kathy asks “BibleProbe” what heaven is going to be like and what our heavenly jobs will be. Here’s his answer. And, yes, he is serious.
This will be your assignment in heaven, should you accept it.
You will be on the comittee to recommend to God what new dimensions you want to see God create. In order to perform this job efficiently, you have to become an expert on the dimensions that already exist beyond the veil of this present earth dimension.
As a collateral duty, you will be in charge of the angels who constantly travel between earth and heaven carrying tears in bottles, which get deposited in the great depository in heaven known as the “Hall of Tears”. Every tear that a Christian has shed is stored there.
On your day off you go “creation gliding“. This is where you zoom at the speed of sound throughout all creation. What’s unique about this creation gliding is that as you ask questions in your mind about what you see — you instantly are told the answer via a special “back channel” link to God. Time is no barrier for a “creation glider”.
You can stand with Jesus as He meets with Moses and Elijah, you can watch as the Red Sea gets parted, and marvel at all the demons who immediately just understood their predictament and doom as Jesus says; “It is finished”. Or, you can watch the small Spartan band hold off the Millions of Persians at Thermopylae in 480 BC. You will marvel at their skill, courage and patriotism. The next time you “creation glide” you may even visit George Washington and his troops as he slips out of Brooklyn and from a sure annihilation by the British under the cover of a miraculous fog. What you really want to see is if God “fixed it” for old George to insure Israel had a friend later on down the line.
That’s, uh, quite an imagination he has there. Maybe he should have considered a career in writing fiction. Though I suppose theology is pretty close…
Update: Many of you are having a hard time believing this is real. Check out his site. He’s seriously insane.