A similar committee: Microsoft in 1978
We finally have discovered, beyond any shadow of a doubt, how our universe was been created. No, it’s wasn’t by some all-powerful eternally begotten long-haired hippy. Nor was it from an Invisible Pink Unicorn (bless his holy hooves). It ends up the universe was created by committee.
Doesn’t everything make so much more sense now?
The most extensive analysis yet undertaken of the structure and contents of the universe conclusively proves the universe was created not by a single entity, as has been widely suggested, but by “a fractious and disorganized committee or committees given to groupthink and petty infighting”, according to Drs. Karl Pootle and Yumble Frick, co-authors of the study. The analysis is expected to have profound implications on the theoretical underpinnings of many popular religions….
“Biodiversity is the primary stumbling block,” said Dr. Pootle. “Whoever created this cacophony of species would have had to be infinitely powerful and infinitely creative, but also infinitely schizophrenic to come up with the myriad different solutions to identical problems that the creators of the universe have. Either that, or we’re looking at a different kind of process altogether”….
“If you’re one guy designing a universe, why come up with twenty different ways of tackling the same issue?” Pootle said. “If you’re omnipotent, presumably you know perfectly well whatever the one solution is that will work best, and you go with that. The fact that the world obviously doesn’t work that way is what led us first to the committee theory. The plants and animals that inhabit the Earth show the kinds of random and incoherent thinking that can only otherwise be found in the products of design committees where there’s a lot of CYA and turf protection going on.”
that’s not overly complicated at all.
why don’t they use the evidence they admit to seeing to come to the simple conclusion that the universe wasn’t ‘created’ at all?
maybe if they had done the research individually instead of by comittee . . .
I wouldn’t be so surprised to discover that microsoft had something to do with the design… I’m waiting to see the blue screen at any moment
Oh my gosh, that was awesome. I wonder if that’s the screen you see when you die… just blue forever?
“A fatal exception has occured. The current application will be terminated.
Press CTRL+ALT+DEL to restart. You will lose any unsaved information.”
That’s the Buddhist version.
rofl, now THAT is funny!
Well, I thought so!
I don’t want to be the guy that doesn’t get an inside joke or something, but… I don’t think those two doctors are real.
Now I WOULD conclude that this was irony, tongue firmly in cheek – but having been exposed to creationist websites I’m never quite sure when complete tripe is meant seriously.
Irony? From a site with articles like “5 Easy Ways to Quash Roomba Sentience” on how to dumb down your robot vacuum-cleaner and “In Wake of Dr. Tiller Murder, Pro-Life Movement Sets Up Camp in Pakistan” because there’s a lot of baby killing taking place in those mountains, and finally “Somali Pirates Hijack International Space Station”?
Naaaaaaaaaah. They’re dead serious.
And don’t forget Rapture Delayed Due to “Technical Issues”
Maybe we should let Pat Robertson and co. know about it.
Must be running on a Windows Server system.
Feh – I don’t question the data but I do question Drs Pootle & Frick’s analysis. Their data can be equally explained by a single creator suffering from some form of Multiple Personality Disorder. I can only think of two religions in the world that fit that category. One is Hinduism (or rather certain strands of Hinduism) and the other is Trinitarian Christianity. Frankly, I think that the Discovery Institute should cut some big grant checks for Drs Pootle and Frick and find them a collaborator in Psychology and have them get to work on that MPD Creator hypothesis immediately.
(And yes – the article is intended as humor. Any time you wonder about a “news” website, go to its main page and look at the other headlines. Right now the same website is flogging stories on ” Maine Voters Outlaw Homo Sapiens Marriage in Referendum”, “Somali Pirates Hijack International Space Station”, and “In Lucky Coincidence, Errant Spy Satellite Strikes Osama”. Sometimes you can’t tell from this simple check – some people create really, really good Poes and some “news” sites are just plain crazy. But most Onion-lite websites like this one will be easily sussed out by this tactic.)
I assumed this was a joke until I followed the link…. I don’t think it’s Poe, you know.
It’s definitely satire.
It was the name “Pootle” that gave it away for me.
Also, the publication date is in the future… “tomorrow’s news today”…
Slartibartfast designed the coastlines.
This proves nothing! God can do anything, so he’s perfectly capable of inflicting multiple personality disorder on himself.
lol yeah and God is also perfectly capable of making things “appear” like everything was random chance, complexity evolved, and that there doesn’t “seem” to be someone up there caring and micromanaging everything. He is a true mystery.
But he couldn’t have lied when he wrote the Bible…oh…wait…
“His holy hooves”? Blasphemy!
I’m glad someone else picked up this offensive slander.
Some funny articles on that site:
grrr
http://www.avantnews.com/news/315709-study-finds-less-to-be-less-not-more-than-more
these fake news websites are created to confuse web bot