The Danger of Dreams and Goals

that's right sweetheart, dreams and goals are Satan's way of distracting you from making dinner

  • Sue Blue

    OMS – This is exactly the message I got as a child and teenager in the early 1970s. In my small town they’d apparently never heard of feminism or the cultural revolution of the ’60s. “Women aren’t supposed to think – they’re supposed to cook (and clean, and pop out babies, and look 25 forever).” I had to hide books about science, especially – gasp! – evolution, under my mattress like porn, and god forbid that I should talk about anything other than god, church, my hopefully immediate post-high-school marriage, how many kids I hoped to have, etc. I couldn’t even be proud about my good grades in math and science because, well, that was just weird. You’d have thought I was hiding a penis under my dress or something.

    • Len

      Be quiet and make me a sammich.

      ;-)

      • T

        I think I just fell in love with Len.

      • Sue Blue

        Would you like a beer with that?

        • Len

          Yes. And make sure it’s cold.

    • Al R

      Sue, maybe not you but there are some guys who are hiding a penis under their dress!

      • Sue Blue

        Al R – It wouldn’t have been so bad if I was hiding a dick – everyone would have just sighed and said, “well, that explains it. A girl could never have wrapped her little head around calculus.”

        • busterggi

          I have a penis and I could never wrap it or my head around calculus.

  • Nelly

    my father’s “sex chat” with me:

    “you won’t like it, it’s going to hurt, but it’s your job as a wife”

    seriously

    that screwed me up until I was at least 30.

    thanks dad, rot in hell…………………………….if only

    • T

      Sigh. I wish I could punch your dad in the junk and give you a hug.

      • http://theotherweirdo.wordpress.com The Other Weirdo

        You know, whenever you talk about punching a guy in the junk, every guy in the world cringes, even ones who have never had a thought like that or have ever oppressed women. I thought there was never a justification for violence.

        • Custador

          Out of interest, can anybody actually back thay saying up? I mean, I’m no philosopher, but I can think of many, many scenarios which I would think absolutely justify violence, or even the use of lethal force.

          • TrickQuestion

            I’m generally a pacifist, but if it were easier to get away with violence sometimes, i surely would.

            for instance, i would show up at every single westboro protest and wail the snot out of everyone over 18

          • http://themikewrites.blogspot.com JohnMWhite

            Also, can anyone back up the assertion that every guy in the world cringes when hearing of or seeing another man hit in the genitals? I don’t. I’m not them. That doesn’t mean I do not empathise to an extent, or think “that’s a shame if it really hurts” but I do not have a visceral reaction that actually affects my body.

            • UrsaMinor

              The proper thing to do is to take a poll of all 3.5 billion men on the planet, although if you limit it to adult respondents, you only have to interview about 2 billion.

              Me, I cringe at the thought. I find it difficult to imagine that any man who has ever been hit hard in the testicles himself would not have a similarly visceral reaction.

        • vasaroti

          Considering the amount of violence perpetrated against women (legal and illegal,) I find it rather quaint that men should be so shocked when women contemplate giving men a dose of their own medicine. A woman’s reproductive parts are actually favored areas to injure, from what I’ve seen.
          Sorry, but I gotta say this- It reminds me of Christians claiming they are persecuted. There may well be a war between the sexes, but women didn’t start it.

          • aishoka

            Your last sentence is going in my Sticky Note reserved for quotes until I find the next great one. Attributed, of course. :)

          • T

            Thank you.

    • Sue Blue

      For a guy like this, I would like to don a 14-inch spiked strap-on, bend him over, and tell to take it like a man, that big boys don’t cry, and that it’ll put hair on his chest – so shut up and spread ‘em.

      Really, I’m a sweet little 49-year-0ld grandma, but not when it comes to the kind of blatant, bullying sexism you endured.

      • Anonymous-Sam

        Can you GET those outside of Japan?

        • Sue Blue

          I didn’t know you could get them IN Japan.

  • Nathan

    Since when does making dinner get in the way of dreams and goals? Now go finish my laundry. ;)

    • UrsaMinor

      For those of us who like to cook, making dinner is itself the dream and the goal.

      • Custador

        Did you see my fourteen feet long spice rack on g+ yet?

        • UrsaMinor

          I did. Sweet, if you’re tall enough to reach it and have less than fourteen linear feet of spices. I’m afraid it would be impractical for me on both counts.

        • Kodie

          I don’t even have 14 spices.

        • Jer

          Oh, look at that adorable spice rack! Eight spices? Some must be doubles. Ore-GAH-no? What the hell?

        • UrsaMinor

          Hmmm. Interesting. I take it, then, that no one else here has cubebs, long pepper, grains of paradise, galingale or saunders in their culinary arsenal?

          • Kodie

            Salt, pepper, mustard, celery salt, cinnamon, “italian seasoning,” turmeric (I bought by mistake), popcorn cheese, hot pepper flakes, vanilla extract, sesame seeds, assorted color toothpicks, and a coffee creamer of quarters for laundry. These are the contents of my spice rack. That’s 13 spices.

            • UrsaMinor

              It’s a start. I have three kinds of cinnamon (cassia, Vietnamese and Ceylon, all with very different tastes). And several kinds of pepper, from different species of tree.

              I must admit, though, that my spice cabinet is lacking toothpicks or quarters.

              If you don’t know what to do with the turmeric, it’s good in Indian and Middle Eastern dishes, and a small pinch of it in western-style chicken soup is excellent.

              Spice trivia: turmeric and galingale are both closely related to ginger. The powdered versions of all three of them are finely ground dried roots (well, technically they’re rhizomes, or underground stems).

              And cinnamon is just ground tree bark. This becomes glaringly obvious from the soggy-sawdust texture you get if you put too much in your cinnamon rolls. Don’t try this at home, folks.

            • Kodie

              I can’t remember the last time I used the cinnamon. I do remember the last time I used the turmeric, since I tried a recipe of muffins that called for nutmeg. I say those muffins were edible in spite of it all, but they didn’t go over well. It might have taken me another year to go by to wonder, “when the heck did I buy turmeric? Why did I buy turmeric?” and another year to remember I picked it up instead when I thought I bought nutmeg, because I’m like, “whatever happened to that nutmeg I had?”

              As far as “it’s a start” – that’s all the space I have on the rack. As far as apartments go, I’m kind of surprised I have a spice rack. It looks like someone made it in shop class, but it’s the first time I’ve ever had a spice rack.

            • Jabster

              Can’t say I use that many dried spices as I’m more a fresh herbs and other stuff man myself! So I’ve got quite a few by it’s just not often that I use them … maybe some paprika, cinnamon, cloves or star anise but that’s about it really. On the other hand I go through large amounts of fresh rosemary, thyme, sage and mint. Then there’s also the garlic, ginger, mirim, soy sauce, fish sauce, shrimp paste, chillies, red wine vinegar, rice wine vinegar and anchovies amongst others… who needs dry spices?

            • UrsaMinor

              Dried spices are the tip of the iceberg. And let’s face it, some things were never meant to be dried. Sage, for example. And parsley. And rosemary. I grow my own. The sage is just outside the back door, where I can cut a sprig even in the winter. The rosemary isn’t quite so hardy in our climate, so mine lives indoors on the kitchen windowsill. The parsley, alas, is seasonal.

              I’ve had abominably bad results trying to grow my own onions or garlic, but chives and leeks do extremely well for me.

            • Mogg

              I have a rosemary bush named Lazarus because it came back from the dead several times before eventually finding a happy home by my back doorstep where it thrives. On the other hand, I am apparently the only person in the world who can consistently kill parsley.

              Galangal and ginger are both found in my cooking supplies, and I have ornamental ginger in a pot on the front porch which comes from a rhizome which was in the Melbourne Botanic Gardens for over a century. It’s kinda cool to have plants with a history that long.

  • Bertrand T Russell

    These people should be beaten, around the head, with a bible………..

    • aishoka

      Why is your solution to everything violence alone? Seriously, have a think about it.

    • trj

      Ironically, your namesake, Bertrand Russell, was a knowledgeable pacifist. Whereas you just seem to be a mindless thug. I don’t remember you ever making a comment that didn’t say someone should be maimed or beaten up. Grow up, already.

  • vasaroti

    This picture reminds me of Historic LOL, a cheezburger site that used to be amusing, but has become steadily more unfunny, in no small part due to misogynist captions.


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