It’s Not Possible to Mock This Enough

Via Joe.My.God., it seems that New York State Senator Marty Golden is branching out from his usual anti-gay rhetoric to help out those poor unemployed women folk get jobs by teaching them how to be ladies.

Later this month, Republican State Sen. Marty Golden’s office is holding a career-development event for women in his southern Brooklyn district teaching them “Posture, Deportment and the Feminine Presence.”

That’s according to a taxpayer-funded mailing being sent out in Golden’s district, which an offended reader passed along. The taxpayer-funded event – presented by a “certified protocol consultant” – is part of a series teaching women in Brooklyn “what’s new in the 21st century as it relates to business etiquette and social protocol.” More details are also available on Golden’s Senate website, including the fact that women in attendance will be taught to, “Sit, stand and walk like a model,” how to, “Walk up and down a stair elegantly” and “Differences in American and Continental rules governing handshakes and introductions.”

I didn’t know that I could *facepalm* that hard. I think my wedding band is lodged in a sinus cavity.

Chris Bragg at City & State reports that the event has been canceled.

  • Milton Zmijewski

    This is how the party of nimrods are going to win the woman vote – very insulting.

    • JohnMWhite

      Honestly, I think it is, and I truly think they are too dense and self-centred to understand why it is a problem. That’s frightening, because a good proportion of women are still going to vote for them, so there never is a significant corrective pressure to force the party to realise how warped their relationship with American women is. Somehow we have grown adults in a position of significant political power who are essentially running the He-Man Woman Haters’ Club and think they’re doing women a favour at the same time.

      • Kodie

        Thing you have to understand is that one of the (many) ways to be a woman is to be the woman who upholds certain standards of femininity and is judgmental of women who don’t comply. In some ways, nobody hates women more than other women.

        • greyseal

          True that, Kodie!

        • Mogg

          Unfortunately true :-(

  • mikespeir

    This guy’s a fool. It’s not possible to walk up and down stairs elegantly.

  • Ryan

    Too funny. Looks like the most recent update at Joe. My. God. says it’s been cancelled.

  • vasaroti

    Actually, I confess to having fantasies of sending my Daughter to some sort of brief ‘polishing’ class – although I don’t think walking like a model has much impact when one lives in Crocs and Mass Effect T-shirts.

    • Kodie

      I took a poise/modeling class when I was 15 or 16 – waste of money. Well, I do have pretty good posture, I think, but not because of the class. Kind of got the sense that this was stuff only old ladies think about. I don’t know if that’s just me, I know my mom probably thought I needed some remedial help. Basic manners on how a lady behaves, how to apply make-up, an awkward “modeling” shoot (the photographer recognized me 5 or so years later at Sears though), and how to walk (glide; one foot in front of the other, not like a man would; pick up your feet and no clomping), how to sit (knees together but not crossed, unless you want veins), how not to be trashy – if there’s one thing I really remember from this class is that it’s trashy to stop and have a conversation with someone on the sidewalk. I never knew that. Maybe young ladies today would benefit from at least the lesson how to pick up your feet and not clomp. Women’s shoes are louder than men’s, maybe, or something about how strong they feel in their shoes. Alternately, shuffling is gross and infantile. It’s totally possible to pick up your feet when you step and not sound like a horse.

      I guess tell your daughter that.

      • Ken

        While I scoff at the political aspect, I do recognize a need for better manners among some women, and men, for that matter. Certainly there is an overbearing prissiness in this proposal, but I can sympathize with a program that tries to curb the indiscriminate use of the f-bomb for every trivial occasion in public. What Kodie describes is 100% true in terms of old-lady rules, and deserves ridicule. But I still see people of all ages who think screaming “motherfucker” in the mall is just a hearty greeting — the mind boggles at the thought of their workplace or job interviews. And let’s not overlook that the most severe critics of women are often other women: checking out each other’s clothes, makeup, belly fat, skirt length, hair cut, nail polish, cleavage exposure, etc. The catty things my wife and co-workers come up with continually rattle my brain — things I either never noticed or thought were actually kinda attractive. I live in a college town, and it is funny to see the “individuals” expressing themselves by all getting tattoos, wearing boots in the summer, and having piercings. It’s all about conformity, so I can see Senator Golden’s presumption that “they” need to be roped into looking and behaving more like “us.” I just think he was a little heavy-handed here, and maybe picked the wrong approach to it. Now if he had approached the issue as a job-interview skills seminar, there would have been less of an odor or condescending sexism.

    • FO

      Any formal dancing style will give your daughter all the poise *she* wants.
      Not the one *you* want, though.

      • vasaroti

        I don’t think you know what I want. I am not overly concerned about her movement skills; I’d just like her to hear that basic manners s are not my personal idiosyncrasy, and that her idea of dressing up is everybody else’s “casual Friday.”

  • busterggi

    That’s an awful lot of words to say, “Just shut-up and bring me my coffee”.

  • Artor

    My ex, being a tall woman, (6′) used to have a pretty bad slouch. * years of intensive martial arts and one black belt later, she now has perfect posture * poise. Anyone suggesting she’s not sufficiently ladylike might find their own posture problematic, as it’s hard to stand up straight when your head is jammed up your ass.

  • UrsaMinor

    So, who’s going to pick up the slack and get after the guys to work on their personal grooming, posture, and social skills?

    • Kodie
      • UrsaMinor

        Hurrah. We are saved.

      • FO


  • Thin-ice

    You know an event is doomed to failure when the advertising flyer uses the font “Mistral”.

  • Carlos Sutter

    You know, seeing this ignorant sexist misogynistic man-in-charge carry out his duties (and similar Republicans), is actually a wonderful opportunity for us to easily understand why macho ignorant and misogynistic men, 3000 years ago, when creating a god, thought He would also be preoccupied seriously with fashion as to the correct way and number of tassels a man should wear, the mixture of textiles, length of hair and beards, etc. Rape, mass murder not too concerned, but DON’T YOU DARE mix textiles in your clothes!!! Notice the lack of development/growth once you place yourself within certain mental channels.

    • vasaroti

      I’ve always wondered if the mixed fiber thing was a sumptuary law or maybe some sort of concession to the wool lobby.

      • Artor

        I think it was because the sheep-herding, wool-wearing Hebrews didn’t like the uppity Nile-dwelling linen & cotton wearers, those decadent bastards.

  • The Other Weirdo

    My irony meter exploded when I read that. “What’s new in the 21st century…” Seriously? You’re gonna teach a class on what’s new in the 21st century when you use words like “deportment”?

  • Buffy

    What’s new in the 21st century? 1950′s style “training” for women.

  • Not Completely Useless

    Do you think the senator would attend a class on how to be a decent human being?