Don’t Go In the Basement

This video has been making the rounds and it … wow, is it bad …

That’s Matt Pitt, founder of a youth ministry called Church of the Eternal Douchebag the Basement, so named because it was started in his basement. It has grown to be a very large ministry in the state of Alabama, which honored him as an “Alabama Difference Maker.”

This video was shot in August. In May, Pitt was arrested for impersonating a police officer. His car was equipped with flashing blue lights and a siren, and he was using these to clear the road as he shot through.

Apparently he thought – or claimed to think – that he was deputized when he was made an “Alabama Difference Maker.” Along with Damon Thompson‘s career, I think this proves that if you’re too dumb for anything else, you can always make a living as a youth minister.

  • J-Rex

    Since when is “chocolate” thinking outside of the box?

    • trj

      Sometimes it comes in a bag.

  • Artor

    I had a housemate once who was a Methodist youth minister. He seemed like a nice guy, and he never tried to push his religion on me, so I thought all was cool. Until I found a blank CD laying on the mantle. I thought it might be one of mine, full of music mp3′s, so I put it in my computer to see what was on it. Lo & behold, it was full of bestiality porn, and dear gods, I hope that girl was of legal age! And I’m pretty sure neither the horse nor the dog involved really consented. I threw it out & never mentioned it. Not surprisingly, he never asked about his missing CD.
    Later, I had to look in his room for the house landline phone. I discovered every horizontal surface covered in cups full of fermenting piss. Apparently, it’s too much trouble to climb a single flight of stairs to take a leak after a night of drinking, or even in the morning after to pump out your bottles. These were drinking cups from the kitchen, mind you. I’d been wondering what the weird rings etched into the plastic cups were from…
    Funny thing, this guy’s room was in…THE BASEMENT!!!

    • Kodie

      It is like your own little horror movie right there.

  • Hitchslapper

    Time to crucify that bitch………..

    • FO

      You are creepy.
      Seek treatment.

      • kessy_athena

        Don’t feed the troll, FO.

        • FO

          You are right, sorry.

  • FO

    I’m much better at making sums…

  • Keulan

    If that clip was supposed to make me laugh, it failed miserably.

  • kessy_athena

    Are we 100% sure this isn’t from the Onion or something? That clip looked like really bad stand up comedy to me, not, errr, whatever it was supposed to be. The really sad thing is that he probably hasn’t removed himself from the gene pool with that.

    My only explanation for this is that Basement Cat must have decided he needed a scratching post / plaything in between harvesting souls. ;)

  • http://www.worldsworstmoms Tammy@WorldsWorstMoms

    He must be an awesome boyfriend.

  • Darren

    If Justin Beiber and Larry the Cable Guy had a baby.

    Really, though, growing up going to Youth for Christ rallies every week, that looks all too familiar.


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