Headline of the Day: Himalayan Kung Fu Nuns

Kung fu nuns teach cosmic energy to CERN scientists

(Reuters) – A dozen kung fu nuns from an Asian Buddhist order displayed their martial arts prowess to bemused scientists at CERN this week as their spiritual leader explained how their energy was like that of the cosmos.

The nuns, all from the Himalayan region, struck poses of hand-chops, high-kicks and punches on Thursday while touring the research centre where physicists at the frontiers of science are probing the origins of the universe.

Sounds like a late night B-movie. Or maybe a really trippy porn.

Unfortunately the title was the best part. I don’t think the scientists and engineers at were impressed by this:

“Men and women carry different energy,” said His Holiness Gyalwang Drukpa, a monk who ranks only slightly below the Dalai Lama in the global Buddhist hierarchy. “Both male and female energies are needed to better the world.”

This, he said, was a scientific principle “as fundamental as the relationship between the sun and the moon” and its importance was similar to that of the particle collisions in CERN’s vast “Big Bang” machine, the Large Hadron Collider (LHC).

The nuns, mostly slim and fit-looking teenagers with shaven heads and clad in flowing burgundy robes, nodded sagely.

I support Drukpa’s mission of women’s equality and empowerment, but I don’t think we need his insight into high level physics.

  • Sunny Day

    I would have said, “Great! I happen to have some of the worlds best instrumentation to detect energy! Lets get you over here so you can demonstrate your energy and we can measure it.”

    “Hey! Where are you going? Why are you running away so fast? Don’t you want to show me your energy?”

    • trj

      It goes without saying that although this energy (or “energies”) is of fundamental importance and has significant effect on us it is unfortunately entirely undetectable by any instrument.

  • Sunny Day

    Well this article sure has energy, large bold font type energy.

    • UrsaMinor

      The comments have acquired the very same energy, at least on my monitor. Weird.

      • Mogg


        • UrsaMinor

          Or an HTML tag error that got fixed. It’s all better now.

  • FO

    “Hey Drukpa, we are a bit low on energy for the accelerator, you think you can give us a hand?”

    Let’s make it practical, let’s see what they say. =D

    Still, it’s cool teaching kung fu to nuns, and definitely a step towards gender equality.

    • Reginald Selkirk

      Still, it’s cool teaching kung fu to nuns

      And marketable too.

  • Reginald Selkirk

    What could be more interesting and exotic than kung fu nuns?

    Catholic Kung Fu Nuns
    (video 02:05)