Don't You Dare Ruin Die Hard For Me!

They’re going to make a fifth Die Hard film?

No.  No, no, no no, no no, no no, no no, no no, no no, no no, no no, no!

This cannot be allowed to happen!  The first Die Hard was my first exposure to Alan Rickman!  The second movie is a staple of my winter holiday TV time!  I have such fond memories of John McClane kicking every ass in the universe and being an acerbic smartass while doing it.  They lucked out in that the fourth one was decent, but let’s not drive this franchise into the ground like so many sequels have done to my favorite flicks from my youth!

Beverly Hills Cop?  The third one blew chunks.

Lethal Weapon?  Managed to string the goodness out for three films.  The fourth one was so lame.

Highlander?  Not even the addition of Sean Connery could rescue the series.  There should have been only one!

Batman?  Michael Keaton and Jack Nicholson were great.  Even Batman Returns was good.  Then it became a cartoon.

The Matrix?  Don’t get me started.  Awesome fight scenes do not a masterpiece make – and they even took the awesome fight scenes out of the third movie and failed to replace them with so much as a shitty plot.

Die Hard is still a beloved set of action movies.  Let’s leave it there!  The Die Hard franchise is John Elway after he won his second Super Bowl – retire on top guys!

PERSONAL: Happy birthday, Hitch.
You guys are wonderful.
PERSONAL: Sorry to disappoint you, Julian.
Update and pics from #AACon15. MST3K cast members were at my talk.
About JT Eberhard

When not defending the planet from inevitable apocalypse at the rotting hands of the undead, JT is a writer and public speaker about atheism, gay rights, and more. He spent two and a half years with the Secular Student Alliance as their first high school organizer. During that time he built the SSA’s high school program and oversaw the development of groups nationwide. JT is also the co-founder of the popular Skepticon conference and served as the events lead organizer during its first three years.

  • VeritasKnight

    You know, if it’s anything like Live Free or Die Hard, you just have to wait for the Director’s Cut and you’ll have an actual Die Hard movie!

  • Chrisj

    They didn’t really make any sequels to Highlander; that’s just a myth. There’s a persistent story about a third (and even fourth) Terminator film, too, but those don’t exist either.

  • Randomfactor

    And may the Force help us if Lucas ever makes any of those prequels to the three Star Wars movies that he’s threatened…

  • Dhorvath, OM

    I, uh, I am absurdly excited at this prospect. I love all four Die Hard movies, save for a little bit with a semi and a jet, and will be salivating until McClane does another turn at indestructible.

  • DysgraphicProgrammer

    If you liked ‘Live Free or Die Hard’ I can deduce that you are not a computer expert of any sort.

  • MattR

    Highlander? Not even the addition of Sean Connery could rescue the series.

    Ummm….. wasn’t he in the first one?

  • ajb47

    Well, McClane hasn’t saved the world yet. In the first (one of my favorite holiday movies, along with Lethal Weapon), he saves some people in a high-rise. In the second (blah), he saves several planes full of people. In the third, he saves New York. In the fourth, the country.

    They almost have to make a fifth one where he saves the world since they already did 5th Element, where he saves the universe. You can’t leave a hole in the story like that.


  • george.w

    Batman? Michael Keaton and Jack Nicholson were great. Even Batman Returns was good. Then it became a cartoon.

    A cartoon? I love cartoons. Batman, The Animated Series is one of the most awesome things ever put into a box set. They got the story and characters exactly right, so don’t dis cartoons.

    Totally agree we don’t need another DieHard movie though.

  • Art

    Bean counters run everything and they, in their tiny dark hearts, know that like ‘reality TV’ one more Die Hard movie is a high return return option. No matter how bad it is, will be, they know that the Die Hard name and star roll will trigger an unavoidable need to go see it. They have every action movie fan by the short and curlies. They could assemble a ninety minute blooper reel from the previous Die hard episodes and twenty million people would still fork out full freight to see it.

    Not producing another one makes sense. Going out on top shows style. But making one is a fifty million dollar sure-thing. And accountants and bean counters are all about avoiding the opportunity cost of not grabbing the low-hanging fruit, even if it is rotten and full or worms.

  • NathanDST

    MattR @6: I think he might be referring to the second movie, which sucked donkey balls, but did have Connery in it.

  • Ray Moscow

    The nature of film and TV is that they keep remaking sequels until they are so terrible that they lose money. One just has to cut them off somewhere and refuse to watch the crap ones, lest they ruin your enjoyment of the good ones.