This Week's Whipping Boy

A follower on twitter by the handle of JM3virginia pointed me to the twitter feed of Terry Crews the other day.  It was probably because the football-player-turned-actor was throwing out all manner of bad apologetics.  It was like a siren calling to me.

So I tweeted at him asking for his best argument for the existence of god.  The response came back…

@jteberhard that fact that our bodies are miraculously designed. I know mine is. (couldn’t resist)

This would not be just any random argument – this would be his best argument.

For starters, men have nipples.  This makes perfect sense on evolution, but could only be the product of a designer who was an idiot who enjoyed extra work.

Then, as another tweeter (serialmatrix) pointed out, we breath, eat, and talk out of the same hole.  Great design if the aim was to choke us.  Idiotic design otherwise.

Then there’s the appendix, which serves no function aside creating a superfluous amount of white blood cells, but is a ticking time bomb in a lot of people.  Makes sense as a remaining appendage from a bygone time, but absolutely zero sense as the product of design.  Also, wisdom teeth.  WTF?  Whose brilliant idea were those?

There are countless flaws to the human body that look just like the product of random chance combined with selection over a long period of time.  If these features were actually designed, they would require a designer to be a moron with way too much time on its hands, which is not something anybody should call a god.  But I’m going to wrap up with DNA replication.  It’s clumsy as all hell.  Errors in DNA replication produce all kinds of in-born conditions  as well as cancer.

If a designer designed mental retardation and cancer into the human condition (and who calls that shit ‘miraculous’?), I’d like to find that god so I can punch it square in the jaw.  My wrist would probably break because bones are fairly brittle.  I would’ve designed bones made of steel.  I have officially come up with a better design than god.  I rule.

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About JT Eberhard

When not defending the planet from inevitable apocalypse at the rotting hands of the undead, JT is a writer and public speaker about atheism, gay rights, and more. He spent two and a half years with the Secular Student Alliance as their first high school organizer. During that time he built the SSA’s high school program and oversaw the development of groups nationwide. JT is also the co-founder of the popular Skepticon conference and served as the events lead organizer during its first three years.


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