I recently picked up a skill: doing acrylic nails on myself and others.
I am a chronic nail biter. By “chronic” I mean that from the age of about 5, I bit the hell out of my nails. Bit them down as far as they could go, until they bled, usually. In fact, if they didn’t hurt or bleed, I’d bite them until they did.
For about three years I stopped: one day (about 3-4 years ago) I went on a painting/wallpaper removal job with a friend. She and I spent days picking at and peeling wallpaper off walls.
After the third day, I realized that I hadn’t bit my nails in three days: mostly because they were tired, coated with wallpaper glue, and I had satisfied my urge to pick by being paid to pick for 6 hours at a time.
I decided than to quit. Let me tell you, it was a battle. Epic. I painted them. I wore band-aids on every finger. I wore gloves. I carried clear nail polish and a file everywhere I went. I put that nasty-tasting stop-biting crap on them. I managed to more or less stop. Usually I’d have one nail bitten, but amazingly, my nails grew long enough that I actually had to clip them. Forgetting my polish or file resulted in disaster.
Then I experienced a bout of depression. I started biting them more. Or, I’d forget my polish more. I bit them all off. I went right back to my old habits.
My sister Becca had suggested going to a nail salon and having acrylic nails put on. When my friend Tisha suggested it as well, we decided to have a girl’s night out and get our nails done.
This is turning into a long story…
My first set of nails was a disaster. They were thick, the guy made them too long, and he insisted on cutting them square. A week later I went to a new place, where I got the nails replaced completely with a new set.I’m sort of independent. It didn’t take long for me to want to do my own acrylics. I’m mostly ambidextrous! So I started doing them myself.
Let me tell you, those salon girls make it look easy! I’ve been doing them for at least a month and I’m only now reasonably good enough.
ANYWAY! My husband Christopher is an excellent painter of miniatures. One day, I decided I wanted him to paint GALAXIES on my nails.
Here are pics. Are these not AWESOME?
So here’s the thing. Do you want a set?
I want you to have a set. We can either do them on your actual, real nails, or we can do them on fake nails not attached to your body, like this:
and mail them to you.
I’m writing quickly so I’m not sure exactly how we’re going to do this. Should I auction them off? Raffle them off? Put a set on eBay and you can bid for the SSA? In person, they take abut 4 hours to do from start to finish, and off your body they’d probably take about 2-3 hours or so.
This is post 4/24 by Christina for the SSA blogathon in support of the Secular Student Alliance! Go donate to them!