Ebony Dixon tries to save my soul.

Ebony Dixon found my post on the American Bible Challenge and decided to take a stab at saving my soul.

This makes me sad to know that people flat out ignore or try too, the fact that GOD is real and HE is very much in control of things that go on in this life.

You’re probably going to give me a piece of evidence before claiming I’m ignoring it, right?

There is accountability attached to every word you speak

Even more so now since a bunch of people are reading what you said.  Represent Christ well.

and everything that you do. I pray that the Gospel will be presented to each of you in a way that will make you discard your doubts…

Good job.  Use the time you have our attention to type a prayer that someone else will do it.

…your blasphemy, your distrust of the bible…

Give.  Me. A reason.

…and repent of your sinful ways so that you may give your lives to Christ.

Sinning is a lot of fun.  You’d better have a damn good offer on the table.

You are still alive because there is still time for you to change your mind before it’s to late.

That, and oxygen.  Mostly oxygen.

I believe that it is everyone is entitled to their opinion, and I am just expressing mine.

I love how you defend yourself against an accusation nobody made.  Like running into a police station screaming that you didn’t murder someone.

I was trying to find out how to sign up for the American Bible Challenge and this is where google took me… I don’t believe that this was a coincidence.

 

It wasn’t.  It’s analytics.  I’m a popular guy.

I believe GOD allowed it.

Because you don’t know how google’s metrics work.  Like saying god lifted the airplane when you don’t know squat about physics.  When you form opinions based on feelings rather than research and then vocalize them as though you’re reliable, you wind up looking dumb.  When faith appears to be the thing that gave you certainty in stupid opinions, you reinforce my position that Christianity makes people worse.

So…thanks.

This may be the last chance for anyone reading this to except Jesus as Lord and Savior.

Promise?

GOD and man were cool

One human ate an apple.  That fucker drowned all of humanity.  Boy, are we ever the ones who fucked up.

Man disobeyed GOD (which is a sin)

Isaac should’ve been so lucky.

Sin separated man and GOD

Evidence?

Jesus came to be the bridge to connect GOD and man back together

Evidence?  Ever think that maybe we ignore you because you’re more concerned with what you believe than why anybody else should believe it?

Also, let’s chat about what a real savor looks like.

There is no other name where man can be saved

That sentence makes zero sense.

No man comes to the Father (GOD) without going through the son (Jesus)

Thanks for the super helpful parenthesis.

That’s an awfully silly system for a god who presumably wants us in heaven.  Couldn’t god have said, “Hrm, since I intended for humans to be able to live up to my standards, and nobody has lived up to my standards in all of existence, maybe I fucked up the design or set the bar too high?  I guess I’ll just lower the bar without brutally murdering my son”?

 

If you would like to accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior say this prayer…

Dear lord, please make my enemies ridiculous…

Dear GOD, I recognize that I am a sinner and that I need help.

Don’t need help from the guy who thought killing people for working on Saturday made good moral sense.  But go on, dude who worships that guy, tell me how terrible I am and how much help I need.

I believe that Jesus died on the cross for my sins and rose again.

I don’t.  Because people rising from the dead is ridiculous.  Because I treat my beliefs like their accuracy is important, I don’t believe in ridiculous things without evidence.

So I would like for Him to come into my heart and help me to live a new life so that I can live in right relationship with you.

A new life where I can give up 10% of the money I fucking earned every week?  Can’t sign up fast enough!

In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.

Ever notice Jesus doesn’t talk back?  There’s a reason for that.

If you prayed this prayer, you have been born again.

I feel no different than I did thirty seconds ago.

If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that GOD raised Him from the dead, you shall be saved.

Or gullible.  Definitely one of those two.

I pray that GOD will lead you to a church that will teach you the Word of GOD and surround you with people who will be an example of godly living.

About JT Eberhard

When not defending the planet from inevitable apocalypse at the rotting hands of the undead, JT is a writer and public speaker about atheism, gay rights, and more. He spent two and a half years with the Secular Student Alliance as their first high school organizer. During that time he built the SSA’s high school program and oversaw the development of groups nationwide. JT is also the co-founder of the popular Skepticon conference and served as the events lead organizer during its first three years.


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