Meanwhile in Africa…

This is the dumbest thing.

First, it’s bullshit.  It’s a straight up lie.

Sports marketing experts have said Douglas, who became the first African-American woman to win the all-around gold, could earn between $2 to $3 million dollars with endorsement opportunities. Douglas has no idea.

“I just Googled my name and I read, ‘Gabby just signed a $90 million contract!’ What? They were saying she’s worth, two to three to four million dollars,” Douglas said poking fun at all the online fiction. “I need to stop, when money gets involved, I have to go on Twitter and don’t read anything about myself.”

When you have to lie to defend your position, it’s probably time to abandon that position.

Second, even with the lie this is a terrible message.  Does god not give a shit about people working three jobs to support their kids unless they’re the best in the world at something?  What an ass.  And I mean *best*; because let’s not imagine that all those other gymnasts didn’t bust their asses too.

What’s more, where was god while her mom was working the three jobs?  Did he provide Gabby with the off-brand corn flakes?  Fuck no.  He didn’t even hand her the 90 mil!

And lastly, how shitty to give god credit for the hours each day that Gabby put in!  Even if you’re a Christian, you can credit freewill or god for making it happen.  You don’t get both.

And hey, you can’t expect god to feed the millions of starving kids the world over when he’s so busy bestowing so much on Gabby, amirite?

Christ, these people are so eager boast the carelessness and pettiness of the god they worship.

About JT Eberhard

When not defending the planet from inevitable apocalypse at the rotting hands of the undead, JT is a writer and public speaker about atheism, gay rights, and more. He spent two and a half years with the Secular Student Alliance as their first high school organizer. During that time he built the SSA’s high school program and oversaw the development of groups nationwide. JT is also the co-founder of the popular Skepticon conference and served as the events lead organizer during its first three years.

  • logicpriest

    People do love to give credit for people’s hard work and time to a deity that never even bothered to help pay for the time spent. Makes me very glad I am not something like a surgeon. Spend 16 hours carefully putting someone back together, their mom comes in and praises god for your effort.

  • MLR

    Sadly, I bet Gabby herself would agree with the message. I saw a brief cringe-inducing interview where she was rambling about what “Scripture” says. Oh well, she’s still an amazing athlete in her own right, regardless of who or what she wants to give the credit to.

  • tubi

    In her interview after winning the all around she gave credit to God, and then said how great it was that “all the glory goes to him and all the blessings fall down on me.”

    So yes, she herself fails to give herself credit for the work she did.


    • Chris L. Robinson

      Yep, she’s a 16-year old moron…. Sometimes people can be so fucking flip about these Olympic kids. We’ve got goddamned octogenarian physicists believing in God, but teenagers busting their asses everyday and heading to the Olympics to beat the best in the world are stupid for believing that the god that’s been fed to them in their very limited free time might have had something to do with it.

      Some people need to have their fucking smug stupidity read back to them.

      No, god doesn’t give a shit. But she’s a kid. You want to give her a chance to take freshman biology before taking shots at her?

    • anteprepro

      I concur with Chris. It’s not like she is going around pushing her faith using half-assed apologetic arguments. She is a teenager who was undoubtedly indoctrinated into her faith by a family and larger community that was similarly indoctrinated. By a culture that is god-soaked, by people who succumbed to the same emotional blackmail that they subjected Gabby to. She is no more a moron than the other 95% of this country that believes in God, especially since she is still young and probably had the God bullshit forced upon when she was even younger, when she was far less capable of applying a critical eye to it.

      Rule of thumb: At least let them get through college years before you mock a person for believing shit that their parents and their entire culture pressures them into believing.

      • JT Eberhard


    • tubi

      Fair enough. I retract that part of my post. She was raised by morons.

      • John Horstman

        Yes, and despicable morons who have convinced her that it’s not the combination of her hard work and the support and sacrifices of those around her who helped her win, it’s the imaginary friend of a 3000-year-old desert cult. Denying people credit for their own hard work in favor of ridiculous fatalism is downright misanthropic. Seriously, what the fuck is the point of all those hours of training for a decade if one’s success is ultimately up to Yahweh’s capricious fancy? (I think this one’s in Greta’s book – not this example, specifically, of course, but the whole giving god(s) credit for human achievement; it certainly pisses me off.)

  • Jasper of Maine (I feel safe and welcome at FTB)

    You can’t tell me God isn’t amazing! Hard work really pays off!

    What do these two sentences have to do with one another?

    “The fire chief is amazing! I studied real hard for my test and got a good grade!”

    “My car gets 47 mpg! I finished raking my lawn!”

  • Loqi

    I haven’t been to church since I was a kid, but isn’t there a commandment against lying? Or does it not apply to lying for Jesus? Must be one of those nuanced rules that have some hidden “context” that makes it ok when christians do it. Like that commandment against killing. Killing? Bad. Killing for Jesus? Smashing!

  • iknklast

    Loqi – many people consider a difference between lying and lying for Jesus. That goes back at least to the 4th century, when Eusebius published arguments in support of the pious lie. It’s not really a lie if it promotes Truth. OK, that may sound like an oxymoron, but then, if you can believe that 3=1 and 1=3, why not believe you are telling a lie for the Truth?

  • eric

    Its in comic sans. That right there makes it likely you’re going to be fed a load of baloney. Its sort of like getting a letter in the mail that says “open immediately!!!!” – examining the content is practically unnecessary at that point.

    • Loqi

      It’s the font of truth!

      • John Horstman

        I believe you mean “Font of Truth”. Inappropriate capital Letters are how the Holy Spirit manifests in the Digital Realm.