Sergeant Invincible.

A soldier unloading with a huge gun and rage face.The following is a conversation between me and my friend David from this morning.  He’s explaining the Marvel RPG system to me.  (I’m [ADEMA] Zero…ADEMA was our clan tag for Left 4 Dead 1 & 2 and stands for the Alternative Department of Emergency Military Assistance.  Our RP was that we were a band of mercenaries sent in during the zombie apocalypse.  But I digress…)

Drake: yeah…the rules are kind of open.  Its a total story telling game so it doesn’t matter if you’re OP or not
Drake: Black Widow and Thor can team up and its no problem
[ADEMA]  Zero: Sounds leet.
Drake: looks fun.  Trying to play it over Google Hangouts
Drake: since there’s no need for maps or anything
[ADEMA]  Zero: Ok.  I want to make Sgt. Invincible.  He can kill anything he wants and can never die.
[ADEMA]  Zero: Also flight.
[ADEMA]  Zero: He has flight.
Drake: haha okay sweet.  Sounds like an interesting story.
Drake: I’m sure your comic won’t be cancelled immediately.
[ADEMA]  Zero: This is fresh.
Drake: That’s cool. They spent a lot of money buying the franchise so you can play as awesome heroes.  But Sgt. Invincible sounds awesome :P
[ADEMA]  Zero: In the first installment, we need a villain who thinks he can kill Sgt. Invincible by exploiting his weakness (SI’s dashing good looks are mitigated by a tiny scar on his left foot that haunts him to this day) to kill him.
[ADEMA]  Zero: Of course, he won’t be able to, because Sgt. Invincible cannot die.  Or feel pain.
Drake: even emotional pain
[ADEMA]  Zero: He can feel that.
[ADEMA]  Zero: He can even be a tragic hero who wants to die to escape the emotional pain and never can.
[ADEMA]  Zero: BOOM!
[ADEMA]  Zero: Plot device.
[ADEMA]  Zero: Also he can make it rain whenever he wants.
[ADEMA]  Zero: Which is all the time because he’s depressed.
[ADEMA]  Zero: And even sleeping with a different woman every night doesn’t help.
Drake: haha man that sucks to be him
Drake: And that huge pile of money he inherited from his dead billionaire parents only makes him feel guilty about all the starving children
Drake: and all the supermodels he sleeps with only reminds him of his own immortality while they will grow old and die
[ADEMA]  Zero: lmao!!!!
[ADEMA]  Zero: Laughing so hard over here…
Drake: I’m crying tears of empathy
[ADEMA]  Zero: lmao!

And thus, Sergeant Invincible was born.  I expect a fully developed plot line in the comments by the end of the day.

Bonus points if you can spot the Aqua Teen Hunger Force reference.

  • Matt Smith


  • Perplexed

    I have no idea what JT is talking about in this posting. Could someone explain it?

  • Wes
  • Cubist

    Okay: Sgt. Invincible. Invulnerability, death touch, weather control. Damn, that’s a random set of powers. Calls for going heavily metafictional, or channeling the pre-dead spirit of Grant Morrison, or both.

    Origin story… We open in a large chamber with one wall consisting entirely of 68-inch flat plasma TV screens. This is the culturejamming laboratory of Harry Benzene, obscenely weathy media mogul. He’s been working to create the ultimate summer blockbuster movie; his experimental protocol involves mashups between carefully-selected existing movies. Right now, the Big Oracle Wall screens are showing scenes from TERMINATOR and other Schwarzenegger films; the X-MEN series; the first Richard Donner SUPERMAN; TWILIGHT; vintage CAPT. SCARLET AND THE MYSTERIANS episodes; and the FRIDAY THE 13TH series.
    Of course Harry owns mass quantities of high-end supercomputers. The main software running on Harry’s personal cloud is S.A./V.A.T. (Statistical Aggregator / Video Analysis Tool). a jumped-up pattern-matching tool that can identify tropes/motifs/themes in existing video footage, and combine any given set of tropes/motifs/themes in order to create new footage. There is another display, a free-standing 80-inch flatscreen called the Window, in the middle of the chamber, which displays the fruits of S.A./V.A.T.’s labors.
    Harry likes what he sees in the Window, but he’s not satisfied. It lacks something, something he can’t put his finger on. Shrugging, Harry throws WHAT THE #$*! DO WE (K)NOW!? into the cauldron; scenes from that film appear on the Big Oracle Wall, alongside the SUPERMAN, TERMINATOR, etc scenes. S.A./V.A.T. dutifully extracts tropes/motifs/themes from the new film and mixes them together with what it’s already got. Harry’s looking at the Window, and we see his face light up—yeah, that’s what was missing—
    When Harry regains consciousness, he’s in a featureless void—nothing but ever-shifting fog-clumps in/around/over/beneath him…
    Harry has become SERGEANT INVINCIBLE. He has come to recognize that the universe really does run on narrative tropes. He knows his superpowers; he knows that once you acquire superpowers, you are, by definition, either a superhero or a supervillain; given that those are the only two choices open to him, Harry picks “hero”. S.A./V.A.T. has become Harry’s sidekick, and thru the magic of Quantum, That’s Why, it has somehow become incarnated as a svelte, coldly gorgeous fembot who has 100% perfect unfettered access to any skill ever displayed by any of the characters in any of the films Harry has ever given S.A./V.A.T. to work with as raw material. The newly-reborn Sgt. Invincible and S.A./V.A.T. are both extremely genre-savvy; the Sgt. has no compunctions about exploiting this insight to achieve his goals, but S.A./V.A.T. thinks that’s cheating. They fight crime.

    • invivoMark

      … but why is he a sergeant?

      • Brad

        He’s new money, so he was in the military to pay for college.

      • Cubist

        Why a sergeant? Because Sgt. Bilko and Sgt. Fury and Sgt. Rock. Basically, because TROPES.

        • invivoMark

          I buy it.

    • Chris Hallquist

      I love this origin story.

      As for villains… nothing we’ve said about his powers keeps him from being imprisoned. Or teleported into a black hole…

  • B-Lar

    Or being sinisterly manipulated by Proffessor Mind-control to assasinate the president and lose the love and respect of one and all.

    Professor Mind -control has a moon base, and an exposed brain.