Ex-gay rally in Washington is a great success…for anybody who likes to laugh at the AFA.

Just this week, Sandy Rios of the American Family Association (as in, Americans who work feverishly to prevent families from forming) was bragging about the coming ex-gay rally in Washington DC.  Oh, it was to be an event for the ages!

Rios confidently predicted that “thousands of ex-gays are descending” on Washington for a press conference planned for today at the Supreme Court. She lamented that when she led Concerned Women for America the media refused to hear “our ex-gay friends” because it “undermined the whole effort of the homosexual lobby.”

Thousands!  From among the millions of church-goers in this country, thousands of ex-gays would descend upon Washington, blocking out the sun with their newfound straightness.

Christopher Doyle (heavy on the “Christ”), the man (let there be no doubt) behind ex-gay pride month and the organizer of the rally reiterated the number, and lamented how ex-gays are in the closet for fear:

Doyle told Rios that “tens of thousands” of ex-gays exist but are “in the closet because of fear, shame and threats from gay activists.”

Yes, because it’s ex-gays that must hide within the welcoming arms of the majority.  Those open gays, who must often fear ostracism from their religious parents, have it so easy.

Well, the appointed day of the rally came.  Behold: thousands of ex-gays:

Less than ten people.

“We’re going to show you a thing or two…or eight or nine.”

If that looks like less than ten people, not a thousand, there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation: because it’s less than ten people.

Kind of gives you a whole new mental image when these same people tell you that “Jesus really performed miracles!”

My father upon reading this post: “This is so right that it is almost enough to make you think there is a just God.”

Almost.  ;)

About JT Eberhard

When not defending the planet from inevitable apocalypse at the rotting hands of the undead, JT is a writer and public speaker about atheism, gay rights, and more. He spent two and a half years with the Secular Student Alliance as their first high school organizer. During that time he built the SSA’s high school program and oversaw the development of groups nationwide. JT is also the co-founder of the popular Skepticon conference and served as the events lead organizer during its first three years.

  • Dave Muscato

    The Family Guy clip at the end is perfect.

  • baal

    Reminds me of some of the “huge ground swell” in support of the tea party rallies. You could get more folks to hang around for 10 minutes with free pizza on a street corner nearly anywhere.

    And just like the fake tea party rallies, it looks like the media numbers are on par with the attendees.

    • invivoMark

      Heh, one of those happened in Madison a couple years ago. Not long after there were protesters circling the capitol square for several weeks, at times over a hundred thousand strong, rallying against our governor’s ultra-conservative agenda and the gutting of public unions, none other than Sarah Palin came to our little town to give a talk.

      About 50 people showed up for that one. Whenever there was a pause in Palin’s speech, they would play an audio recording of applause to make it seem like they had a bigger crowd. They also had screens set up around the attendees so that the anti-Walker protesters (still estimated in the thousands at this point) couldn’t be seen by the cameras recording the speech.

      I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything so pathetic.

      • baal

        Little known detail about Ms.Palin is that she grew up in Potemkin Village prior to becoming mayor of Wasilla.

  • invivoMark

    Yes, I’m sure these poor souls are disowned by their parents and families when they come out, and are stalked, threatened, and beaten to death by people for no reason other than for being who they are.

    I’m awed by their bravery.

    I’m reminded of never-nudes: “There are dozens of us!”

  • RhubarbTheBear

    I hope they get to do some touristy things while they’re in the city!

    • Silent Service

      I hope they meet each other at their little rally, figure out they have something in common, and then all take advantage of DC’s gay marriage rights.

  • Silent Service

    Looks to me like they found 9 bi-sexuals willing to limit their options. F@#K that. I did that for too long already.

  • Arakasi_99

    Rule of thumb – if there are more members of the media covering your rally than people participating, you aren’t allowed to claim a vast groundswell of support.

  • EvolutionKills

    I wonder who is more embarrassed; the people partaking in the rally, or the news crew there taping it?

  • http://www.facebook.com/ben.tousey Ben Tousey

    Doyle told Rios that “tens of thousands” of ex-gays exist but are “in
    the closet because of fear, shame and threats from gay activists.”

    It must be so hard on these poor closeted ex-homos… what, with organizations firing them because of who they are… oh, wait.
    But they’re being thrown out of their homes and churches because they choose to “be straight” .. Oh, wait.
    Okay, but Congress and legislatures across the country are trying to make everything about who they are illegal… oh, wait.
    Well, surely evangelical Pastors want to “Build a great big large fence, hundred… fifty or a hundred-mile long. Put all the lesbians in there. Fly over and drop some food. Do the same thing with the queers and the homosexuals. And have that fence electrified till they can’t get out. Feed ‘em and… and you know what, in a few years they’ll die out.” … Oh, wait.
    Okay, but they’re being blamed for earthquakes, hurricanes, fires, and other natural disasters… Oh, wait.

    Maybe these “ex-gays” are just cowards, too afraid to face their real selves. So instead, they enable the abusers. Clearly this has gone beyond absurd.

  • Zugswang

    Oh man, right in my schadenfreude.

  • Paul Loebe

    I love how they fall flat on their faces. I can only imagine those reporters being pissed they were covering such a non-story.