Rest assured, Steve Lonegan is a man.

The other day I wrote about Newark mayor and senate hopeful Cory Booker fighting homophobia as a political figure.  The Republican opposing Booker, Steve Lonegan, wants everybody to know that he is most certainly a man who likes man things.

“It’s kind of weird. As a guy, I personally like being a guy,” Lonegan said. “I don’t know if you saw the stories last year. They’ve been out for quite a bit about how he likes to go out at three o’clock in the morning for a manicure and a pedicure.”

Lonegan then brought up nail care again.

“I don’t like going out in the middle of the night, or any time of the day, for a manicure and pedicure,” Lonegan said. “It was described as his peculiar fetish . . .I have a more peculiar fetish. I like a good Scotch and a cigar. That’s my fetish but we’ll just compare the two.”

Truly a man of the people, this Lonegan (emphasis on the MAN).

Look, being a man is just your gender, dude.  It doesn’t make you better or worse than anybody, and your manhood isn’t augmented by the alcohol you drink (regardless of what Keystone Light commercials tell you).  It also doesn’t dictate what you must enjoy.  Being a man means you were born with a Y chromosomes, it doesn’t mean you’re obligated to like cigars more than having nice nails.  The only recourse Booker has to win over some of the voters in Lonegan’s camp now is to bring out the big guns – no more talking about policy or equality.  Instead Booker needs to talk about how he likes football and repairing cars and dressing any potential sons in blue rather than pink, lest the boys grow up to enjoy theater instead of wrestling.  Then, perhaps, the voters who care more about that shit than Booker’s intellect or moral fortitude will consider him ready to run the country.

What a petty person Steve Lonegan is.  How do so many Americans get swayed by the game he is playing?

About JT Eberhard

When not defending the planet from inevitable apocalypse at the rotting hands of the undead, JT is a writer and public speaker about atheism, gay rights, and more. He spent two and a half years with the Secular Student Alliance as their first high school organizer. During that time he built the SSA’s high school program and oversaw the development of groups nationwide. JT is also the co-founder of the popular Skepticon conference and served as the events lead organizer during its first three years.

  • Matt Dillahunty

    A cigar, eh?

    • tubi11

      Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

    • JTEberhard

      A cigar drizzled in MANaise.

      • Artor

        Did he blow a seal, or is that just mayonnaise on his chin?

  • Criamon

    It’s like in a comment thread when someone is called immature and responds, ‘I am too mature’. Lost the battle once you decided you had to point it out.

  • unbound55

    I can hear Tim Taylor grunting in the background…

    • Loqi

      I read his quotes in the voice of Lord Flasheart from Black Adder.

  • Art_Vandelay

    I bet he hates scotch and has never smoked a cigar in his life.

    • iamgog

      cigars are truly awful. scotch, on the other hand, is wonderous.

  • EvolutionKills

    Anybody want to take bets on how long it is before he’s found propositioning another dude in a public restroom?

  • Zinc Avenger

    The fool, he’s just opened himself up to a successful challenge by a man with XYY syndrome!

  • BobaFuct

    I don’t think fetish means what he thinks it means…

    • Umlud

      I would like to challenge his usage of the word “fetish” by asking him why he felt people were accusing him of carrying around inanimate objects that are supposed to be imbued with magical powers.

  • Loqi

    Personally, I doubt his manliness. I mean, he’s communicating using words. Real men communicate entirely through grunts, snorts, and headbutts. And how does he have time to campaign? Real men are out killing wildebeests with their bare hands and don’t have time for such whimsical endeavors. And what’s his campaign slogan? Probably not a hip thrust, which would be the manly man option. Until I see him out on the plains in a loincloth hunting buffalo with a club while eating handfuls of bacon as the “Now You’re a Man” song from Orgazmo plays on repeat, he’s not earning any support amongst the real manly man men.

  • Highlander

    Even having a Y chromosome doesn’t always make you a man, most trans-gendered women were born with one but do not identify as male.

    • Umlud

      As well, there’re de la Chapelle Syndrome in which an individual is born XX, but with the X chromosome from the father containing the male sex-determination gene (which can happen when there’s a cross-over error between the X and Y chromosomes during meiosis).

      But in both the case of XY transgender individuals and XX de la Chapelle Syndrome individuals, the physical presentation of their primary sexual characteristics are as sexually male.

      Gender identification, though, is a different thing altogether.

  • iamgog

    > and your manhood isn’t augmented by the alcohol you drink

    True though this is, my perception of one’s sense of taste and fashion is heavily augmented by the alcohol they drink.

    Seriously, if I see you downing a Four Loko we can’t be friends.

    • Feminerd

      What about fun, fruity girly drinks with enough punch to make that whiskey look like a weak drink? Those are fun drinks!

      • iamgog

        I will admit to enjoying appletinis from time to time.

        • Feminerd

          They are soo delicious. They are my favorite, in fact.

  • al

    HE is an asshole, i know that by watching one of his ads that is just short of fraud