Bryan Fischer: gays responsible for Rick Perry’s indictment.

I wasn’t even done having a good ol’ fashioned chuckle at this whole situation when I saw this tweet from Bryan Fischer in my special feed:

Fischer Perry

I’ve just received credible information that the D.A. who indicted Gov. Perry is an open lesbian. Abuse of power, anyone?

Funny story about your “credible information,” buddy: no District Attorney indicted Rick Perry.  Perry was indicted by a grand jury.  But that’s just how insidious these gays are!  They can use their lesbian powers to make a grand jury indict someone.  Clearly, this is Satan at work.  Boy, if that isn’t credible, I don’t know what is.

You heard it from Bryan Fischer: gay magic more effective than prayer.

And even if this were true, Fischer is just a-ok with anti-gay people in positions of responsibility.  But LGBT people?  There’s just no way they can get around their bias.  What’s more, watching Bryan Fischer, who makes a living trying to stop gays from getting married, accuse anybody of succumbing to bias and hate to curb the system toward discrimination…that’s the kind of duplicity for which the grandest pillars in the pantheon of hypocrisy were built.

Because threatening a political rival using your powers as governor, that’s not an abuse of power.  But being a lesbian D.A.?  She’s clearly guilty of working while being gay.  The corruption is just obvious to Bryan Fischer (though not to anyone else, but that just shows how he’s two steps ahead).  I mean Fischer, using only his wits and his inside connections, was able to deduce the sexual orientation of an open lesbian.  However would that information have come to light without Fischer’s sleuthing?  Somewhere Sherlock Holmes is jealous.

What an idiot.

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About JT Eberhard

When not defending the planet from inevitable apocalypse at the rotting hands of the undead, JT is a writer and public speaker about atheism, gay rights, and more. He spent two and a half years with the Secular Student Alliance as their first high school organizer. During that time he built the SSA’s high school program and oversaw the development of groups nationwide. JT is also the co-founder of the popular Skepticon conference and served as the events lead organizer during its first three years.